Chapter thirty-five
"Novah. Wake up." I wake up to a female-sounding voice. I lift my head out of my arms and look up. Its Skylar. "Novah, what in God's name are you doing out here? Our room is right there. She gives me a hand in getting up and leads me into the room. "Don't you dare tell me nothing happened." I sit down in front of the vanity. "You've been crying. What the hell happened?" Just thinking about that awful moment makes me want to vomit. "If you don't tell me right now, I will go to every single person in the school. Matt made you cry again, huh? Yesterday at the frat house. The carnival. What the fuck is wrong with him?" How did she know about the Frat house? I have too much on my mind to think about that.
"I don't want to think about it. I'd rather you not bother me about it, please." She huffs and grabs her phone off of the dresser.
"Hey. Where is Matt?" she says to the person on the phone. I groan in annoyance. I pick up my phone and car keys and storm out of the room leaving a bewildered-looking Skylar. I run down the hall, down the stairs, and out into the pouring rain. I unlock my car and quickly get inside. Shit! I didn't bring my purse or bag for school. Fuck! I dry my phone off with the gray hoodie I'm wearing and remember Matt. I quickly brush it out of my mind before I get sadder and more disoriented than I already am.
I turn my phone on and see a missed call from Josh. Fuck! Josh. I've forgotten about literally everything since......my recent situation. I really don't want to talk to anyone right now. I'll call him later...definitely. What time is it? I look at the time and see that it's nine o'clock. Shit! Why is everything going so wrong? I still don't have my purse or bag for school. How am I supposed to get food if I don't have any money?
I take the car keys out of the ignition and stuff them in my front pocket along with my phone. I get out of the car and dash the building, trying not to get more soaked.
Fail. I speed-walk up the stairs, out of breath when I reach the top. I walk down the hall and open the door. Skylar is still sitting on the bed on the phone. I don't look in her direction, as I'm not trying to get interrogated. I grab my school bag and brashly exit the room.
When I get to campus I get out of my car in the parking lot and I have to suppress the urge to scream out. I'm fucking soaked. I'm sweaty under this big ass hoodie, which Matt gave me, I'm hungry and my phone is almost dead. Is there a god? At least I'll be on time for class. Not only, that I look a hot ass mess. I walk to my class and see Ben. He waves energetically but when he looks me over once his expression changes. I sit down next to him.
"Hey, Ben."
"Why the long face?"
"I am having the worse day, possible."
"Talk to me."
"I'm hungry and sweaty and disappointed and I fell asleep in the hall next to my dorm room. I look a mess and I'm emotionally a mess."
"Well, not to sound corny but I think you're rocking the sweaty-gym look. It's hot on you." I smile weakly at him.
"Why are you emotionally a mess?" I can't avoid talking about this. I really can't. I need to get it out of my system.
"It's a long story."
"You wanna go get breakfast? You can tell me all about it."
"But what about class?"
"You and me both need a break." I smile at him and picks up both of our bags off of the floor.
We walk to a little coffee shop that's on-campus. As soon as we walk in I get a strong waft of delectable bakery scents and coffee flavors. We walk up to the counter. He looks at me, waiting for my order.
"Umm...an egg and cheese wrap and a glazed donut." I give the server a friendly smile while I pull out my purse.
"No. I got it." Ben tells me.
"Are you sure?"
"Yep." We go and sit down at a vacant table and in the corner of my eye, I can see a white t-shirt. That reminds me of someone. I look behind me and see Matt sitting at a table behind us drinking coffee. Nice to see he doesn't give a shit about me. I look at Ben worriedly.
"What?"
"Nothing," I reply hastily.
"Okayyyyyy," he sounds concerned for my health. "So, tell me about your day." Shit. Not with Matt here. What if he hears us? I don't want him to hear me talking shit about him. He said that you mean nothing to him! You should talk shit about him loud and proud, my mind informs me. That's true. He ruined my day yet again. This is the third time he's thoughtlessly insulted me.
"Well, I was talking to a friend that I met a few days ago and he said something alarming."
"May I ask, who the friend was?" I sigh and lower my voice.
"Matt."
"Why are you whispering?" he asks and then realization washes over his face. "Oh. If looks could kill, I'd be dead. Anyway, go on." he says, focused on Matt's face in the background.
"He said something that I found, ....sad, so I asked him to come over. I wanted to talk to him face to face about the thing that I'd found sad." Ben looks at me, warning.
"I'm gonna go get the food." he gets up and I just wanna plead, don't leave me, like a needy child but it would be just that. Needy. He grabs the food and walks back to the table, looking over at Matt, angrily. "Keep going."
"He came over and we were talking and......hugging." How do I include the part about us fucking?
"So are you guys more than friends?"
"Well, we were talking about that when he came over. He and I were texting."
"Novah, I'm your friend, and I have to tell you this is not the first or, even, the third time I've heard about this damn guy. I've heard complaints about this guy from about four different women. He's an asshole and you need to stay away from him."
"Well, It's not that easy. He's not exactly...ugly. He's hot...as hell and I can't seem to stay away from him."
"He's toxic, babe." He blushes at the word. "My bad."
"Well, we were talking and I was just telling him about how I think he's a beautiful person."
"In what world?" Ben mutters. I glare at him. "Sorry."
"It seems like he doesn't get told good things about himself very often. It seems like he puts himself down a lot and I was just telling him how I felt about him and he snapped on me. For the third time since I've met him. He said that he doesn't want me....." I wipe a tear from below my eye. "And that I mean nothing to him after I said that I care about him." Ben is just sitting there, agape. "Say something." I croak and wipe the moisture from my eyes.
"He said that to you?" he whispers.
"Yeah. And this wasn't even the first time he's said something like this. The first time he basically called me a slut and the second time he told me to leave him the fuck alone. His words felt like fucking acid when he said them. And we're supposed to go on a date tomorrow." Ben's eyes are bulging, his mouth is wide open and his eyebrows have risen. Ben gets up, abruptly, and pushes his chair under the table loudly. He walks over to the table Matt is sitting at and sits down across from him. I follow him over. "Ben, no. I'm fine. I don't need you to talk to him." Matt looks up at me despondently and then looks over at Ben.
"The fuck's your problem?" Matt asks.
"You're an ass, that's what. You broke the girl's heart. She was fucking sleeping in the goddamn hallway. Skylar told me. She was fucking sleeping in the goddamned hallway, Matt!"
"She doesn't concern you!" Matt yells.
"Maybe you don't want her but other guys do. And the fact that you threaten other guys to stay away from her. I mean, you would think that you would actually be taking care of her. You don't fucking deserve her. You're a piece of shit. You're doing the same thing you did to Frankie, Alessie, Dani. Countless other women. What the hell is wrong with you?" Matt lunges across the table at Ben, grabbing his neck. The next thing I see is Ben underneath Matt and Matt showering Ben's face in punches.
"Matt, stop!" I yell. I grab Matt's shirt but it's not enough strength to pull him off of Ben. Ben is lying there while Matt is just punching his face repeatedly.
"I already fucking told you to stay the fuck away from her!" he yells.
"Matt, please," I say through my tears. He looks up at me and his anger diminishes like sugar in water. He gets off of Ben and walks over to me, his expression now docile and unthreatening. He cups my face in between his bloodied palms.
"Baby, don't cry. I'm sorry. Please, don't cry." He kisses my lips ever so gently. Like a dewdrop on a flower petal.
"Why'd you have to hit him?" I say to Matt. I look at the spot Ben was lying in and see that he's no longer there. I look around and there he is, that he's walking out the door. I run after him, leaving Matt standing there. "Ben!" I shout. Ben turns around and I see the full damage of what Matt has done. I get closer to Ben. His left eye is swollen. His lip is busted and bleeding. His cheeks are shades of pink, purple, blue. Black.
"Ben, I am so, so sorry. I...I'll talk to him."
"No. Novah, It's not your fault that your boyfriend is an asshole. I chose to go and talk to him. I knew the consequences. I knew I was gonna get my ass beat. Just one thing." He's talking carefully and softly because his lips are bleeding and swollen. I put my hand on his face.
"Anything."
"Please, stay away from him. Matt Walker is bad, bad news" With that, he turns and walks towards the parking lot. I turn around and walk back into the coffee shop to get me and Ben's backpack. Me and Ben's backpacks are sitting next to the table which is now upright. Everything looks pretty normal now. Like nothing happened. A dark guy with curly hair is mopping up the spot where the fight took place. I pick up the two bags off of the floor.
"Do you know what all that was about?" The curly-haired guy asks me.
"Yeah. A whole bunch of shit."
"It was about you, huh?" I look up at him confusedly.
"I guess," I say lamely.
"Was the guy on top, your boyfriend?" I contemplate his question. I mean, no. I am so mad at Matt right now. Ben called him my boyfriend. Is that how Matt acts around me?
"Umm....No."
"Well, he must want to be if he's willing to fuck someone up like that. The guy on the bottom, too. He got his ass beat. He must really like you." Ben? Ben doesn't like me. Either way, I'm tired as hell right now.
"Have a nice day," I say lethargically.
"You too," he says, chuckling. I walk out of the coffee shop and make my way to my car. I'm not even gonna bother going to the rest of my classes. I mean, I only had two today, anyway.
"Novah," I hear somebody say. I recognize that husky voice. I see Matt approaching me, not a scratch on his face. His eyes are red and his hair is disheveled. How can he be so hot, even when I'm mad at him? I ignore him and continue walking towards my car, bags in hand. Matt follows me to the car.
"Can we please talk?" he asks, for once, politely. I turn around and face him, fury coursing through my veins.
"What do you want from me, Matt?! I poured out my heart to you and you turned around and rejected me! How many times are you gonna make me feel like shit?! I fucking hate you." I open my bag and look for my keys, noticing that they're not where I put them, in the front pocket. Matt jingles them in front of me. "Why the hell do you have my keys?" I ask angrily.
"You left them on the table at the coffee shop."
"You're such a creepy fuck," I said nastily. I hold out my hand.
"You're not getting your keys until you promise that you'll talk to me." I cross my arms.
"Why should I? You looked me dead in the eye and told me that I mean nothing to you. That you don't want me. What would you do if I said something like that? Your words.....hurt, Matt" My eyes water up again. I quickly swipe underneath them. I don't want Matt to see me crying, yet again. Too late. He stuffs the keys in his pocket and pushes me against the car. He cups my face in his hands. Wiping away my tear with his thumb. "You say you hate seeing me cry, yet you've made me cry every day. How hard is it to love me?" I turn away from him. "But of course. You don't want me." I look down at my feet. I'd look anywhere to avoid seeing those precious green eyes boring holes into my soul. Gently pleading. Angry at times. Loving at times.
"I didn't know you wanted me to love you," he says in a low, guilty voice.
"I want you. And I wanna be able to care about you. I want you to fuck me day in and day out. Anything but what you did today."
"I'd be anything for you."
"You'll say that now and then you'll throw me away like garbage tomorrow."
"I won't. Let me show you that I can be good...for you. Please. You're the only person that's had faith in me. I need you. I want you. Please, Novah. We have our date tomorrow. Please. I'll try to be what you need. I've never done this before but I swear I'll try." I don't know why. I believed him. I believed those words. I had faith in him. At that moment I was so happy that he would finally try to be something. For me. "You make me want to be good. Please. Give me another chance. Let me love you. We can go on our first date. We can do things together. We can fuck anytime you want." I smile a little bit.
"If you do this again, that's it, Matt."
"Let me love you," he says again.
"I was never stopping you," I say quietly. Little droplets of water start to drizzle down on my face. "If I forgive you, you have to apologize to Ben." He picks up the bags and puts them in my trunk.
"He deserved what he got," he replies coldly. "Talking all that shit."
"Matt." He crosses his arms.
"Fine. Only if I get to stay with you tonight."
"This isn't a negotiation. And I never said you were spending the night with me." He stands there with his mouth open in disbelief. I walk to the driver's side of the car and get in. He gets into the passenger side.
"Please, don't do this to me."
"You made me feel like such shit today, Matt."
"I wanna make you feel good," he says lasciviously. I can't say anything back to that. I want him to fuck me so badly. I just don't think that he deserves to, after today. Yeah, I'll give it another try but I can't let him in that quickly again.
"You said you wanna fuck day in and day out," he adds.
"Where are we going?"
"Stop ignoring me."
"I'm not. Not everything is about sex."
"But we both want it."
"Matt, one step at a time." he sighs and runs his hand through his hair.
"Okay. Were you on your period the last time we had sex?"
"No."
"Really? Cause' there was blood on my sheet afterward."
"Well," I don't finish because I don't want him to be mad that I kept my virginity a secret.
"Wait," he pauses and runs his hand through his hair, exasperated. "I took your virginity?"
"Yes."
"Why didn't you tell me. I was being rough."
"Not really. It barely hurt. It felt really good."
"I'm glad. And I'm honored to have taken your virginity. You're all mine."
"I am so not."
"Yeah? Has anybody else made you scream like I did?" I smile a little at the memory. Him pounding into me. I want that again. I didn't get enough of him that night. I start the car and back out of the parking lot.
"Did you really threaten people?" he sighs and runs his hand through his hair.
"No. Not really. I simply told a few people to stay away from you." I sigh.
"Why? You're making me sound like a monster."
"I didn't want anybody to take you away from me."
"I don't want to talk about this right now. I want to have fun with you." I say with a smile. He smiles back.
"What type of fun?" he asks smugly.
"I don't know. Surprise me. I want something wild."
"Fuck. Novah, I want to bury myself in you," he says, eyes darkening. I bite my lip. He licks his bottom lip.
"Matt," I say trying to focus on the road.
"Focus on the road, baby. Before I don't fuck you right here." I moan softly.
"Baby, stop. You're making me so goddamned horny."
"Do you want me?" I ask softly.
"I want every fucking inch of you. I wanna eat you out right now." I pull into the parking lot of the dorm rooms and pull out my phone.
"What're you doing?" he asks.
"Texting Skylar to see if she's there. If not, we're going to your room."
Hey, are you home? I text Skylar.
Nah. with Jon. be back in a few hours. Luv ya.
Luv u too.
I look over at Matt excitedly. "She's with Jon." Matt smiles.
"Fuck yeah," he mutters. I grab my bag and phone and get out of the car. Matt walks over to my side and pushes me up against the side of the car. He smashes his lips against mine and lifts me, cradling me in his arms.
"I'm gonna show you a night you'll never fucking forget." He walks into the building, up the stairs, and to my room. The door is open. He sets me down on my bed I put all my stuff on the floor. He locks the door.
"Baby, I want you," he says. I toss off his hoodie.
"I'm sweaty as hell right now." his eyes narrow at me and he smirks. He takes off his shirt. I stand in front of the bed waiting for him. He comes over and shoves me on the bed.
"I like it when you're rough with me," I say breathlessly. He unclasps my bra and rips off my panties.
"If you keep saying shit like that then I will be rough with you." he forces my legs apart and slides two fingers inside.
"You're so wet for me, baby" I moan out loud. He buries his face in between my legs, sucking on my swollen clit. I clench the sheets.
"Oh, Matt! That feels so fucking good!" He kisses me straight on the mouth, biting my bottom lip.
"See how good you taste?" I can taste myself on his lips. The saltiness. He kisses me on the neck and then abruptly flips me over. He quickly slips the condom on and slams into me. I cry out.
"You said you wanted it rough. You'll take every single inch of me from the back."
"Yessss....." I moan. He thrusts into me over and over. The pressure building inside of me makes me want to scream out.
"You're so fucking tight!" he says through gritted teeth.
"Faster!" I moan. He starts to thrust faster.
"Come on Novah! You're fucking killing me, woman!" I find the sexual tension is almost at its peak.
"Cum for me, Novah," he yells.
"Mattttt" I moan just as I come. Matt groans and releases just as I double over in pleasure. He falls right next to me, out of breath, just as I am. I revel in the pure bliss of my orgasm. Matt is just staring at me with a smug look on his face.
"I'm not finished with you," he says libidinously.
"What?" He pulls a condom out of his pant pocket and rolls it onto himself.
"I want you on top. Now," he orders. I won't tell him, but I love it when he orders me around. I lower myself on to him and he lets out a long sigh. He places his left hand on my hip and with his other hand he starts to massage my clit.
"Matt," I begin. I throw my head back and start to bounce on him.
"Yeah. Just like that, baby." His erection goes in and out of me and I scream out in delight.
"Matt!" I cry out. He starts to rub my clit again and I feel a burst of pleasure spread through my body. A warm liquid squirts out of me.
"Fuck," he curses as he spills into the condom. I combust on top of him, sweaty and spent. He kisses the top of my head and caresses my back.
"Are you finished with me now?" I ask complacently.
"Only if you want me to be, baby," he says in a low voice. I feel him growing hard underneath me. "I really want to take a shower with you," he admits. I look at him, confused.
"You've never.....Oh. How are you so goddamned innocent?" I cross my arms poutily.
"Hey, I'm not innocent."
"Yes, you are." He smiles from ear to ear and flips me over so that he's on top of me.
"We can go to your place," I say with a goofy grin on my face.
"Whatever you want, baby." He says and leans down to kiss me. "You found me," he says with a solemn expression.
"What?"
"Before I met you, I was lost. Now I have somebody, who cares." I don't know what to say. "You do care?"
"Of course," I say and smile at him. He beams back at me. He lays down, beside me on his back.
"I wish.....I could say what I'm thinking."
"What is that?"
"I want to say it but it would be very unethical. And I know you hate unethical." well at least he knows something about me besides what will make me come. I'm starting to doubt our relationship. We barely know each other. "Do you really want to go to my place?"338Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfFzydHb7F2
"Yes."
"It's safer here."
"Why are you so damn paranoid? I'm not gonna cheat on you with another frat boy. Just trust me." I get up and look around for my clothes.
"Novah, I know what I'm talking about. Better safe than sorry."
"Okay, well, I feel safe with you. I know that nothing will hurt me when I'm with you." I can tell that I've boosted his ego and given him some reassurance.
"Are you hungry?" he asks. He gets up and looks for his pants. He bends down to pick up his pants and I admire his back tattoos. A pine tree, a clock, some small words that I can't read. My eyes move to his lower back. Two names are tattoed there, in cursive. I squint my eyes to see clearer. He stands up and his back straightens, making it easier to read the names.
Maggie and Maritza, my mind automatically goes to, Ex-girlfriends? No. Why would he tattoo two ex-girlfriends' names on his back? He doesn't date, anyway. You don't know that, my mind counters. I really don't know him. He could be hiding anything.
ns3.15.151.234da2
