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我在書枱前呆了大半日。熱茶已涼，但我未嚐半口，心思都在眼前電腦屏幕上——剛輸入的文字不停被刪。字越少，心越亂，人越躁。428Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBcNzTYpZVt
428Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrZdsGAWvFD
不了。受不了。我離座往廚房換茶去。428Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHOYE5HWpo8
428Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmMUTSGD1nN
廳中老妻瞄我半眼，大概知道發生甚麼事，沒有作聲，繼續看電視。我對她的不表態不勝感激——她以最聰明的方法維護我的尊嚴。428Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDZOagY7n67
428Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0hVxn3zGcX
滾水撞上茶葉，水仙香氣隨著冉升白煙溢散開去。428Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQUcRgmukSH
428Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGuI3sotSU4
壓力似乎一併消散。428Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIya7oDoaDp
428Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpkmQbaql9o
茶盡。我再續杯。428Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4bs69LEUZp
428Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4Jcy4yfNAW
添茶不是長遠之計——屏幕白頁上始終沒有片言隻字。428Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAW7BYrGrWi
428Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ74K2hxvnid
嘆一口氣，慨嘆自己太天真可愛。怎麼會相信自己有寫作天分，而且一信就是幾十年。幾十年來，不停寫，不停發表，不停被無視。我只得不停安慰自己說旁人不識貨。428Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRuisVvSbVb
428Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡF4gn2ZBnbj
口不對心。心裡其實清楚自己料子如何。但我還是堅持寫下去。428Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA67ZOK1ADs
428Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡM6M6J31hYO
是習慣、面子、尊嚴緣故，更是不想承認自己做了一個長達幾十年的白日夢。428Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEOepPfIb3o
428Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSVM5mM8MxJ
夢醒一場空。428Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRYOYB6vaPn
428Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv4mqQeP04Q
我本平庸，無甚專長，唯獨寫作能力相對身邊友儕略高丁點。丁點而已，卻足以讓我樂透幾十年。428Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeidUoS9qkT
428Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzVaTBXgXfi
工作不順利時，我會告訴自己——我的專長不在工作上，所以被罵亦是無可厚非；人際關係不如意時，我會告訴自己——如果世人只能用文字溝通，我該是表達能力最好的人；走倒運時，我會告訴自己——我正在為快要誕生的偉大作品累積靈感……428Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP2bYa4eYPg
428Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqck66cqpuV
一切都是有意義的。如果我真有寫作天分的話。428Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6wicWThMwT
428Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkcC7WcT2uL
捧著熱茶回到座位。身在心在能力不在。428Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6fFwVqsmGD
428Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNrCpxzRuTn
在刺眼的屏幕白頁前，我又嘆一口氣。428Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡed8LGOTbjr
428Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBZHaFzx8D8
我不曾長大，仍是幾十年前那個我，沉浸在中文老師讚賞的我。同學們紛表羨慕我的寫作天份，請教我如何想出精彩故事、練出動人文筆。428Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQkV9VwVAWJ
428Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw6fXIDTUps
我沾沾自喜。428Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhVYyYAKMvE
428Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4PsJJ0teD2
細心回想，我當時已覺竅門不在天分，而是努力。努力鑽研文字的運用，努力細味名著佳作當中的韻味，努力思考故事情節起伏，努力觀察分析人世百態……名副其實的將勤補拙。428Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB7JWE236vX
428Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtWInXWc3yM
但我沒有向同學們坦白。428Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1AVcUi1uFO
428Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6w2e1NFTqI
因為我喜歡被讚賞的感覺。428Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFpC0JNUQDe
428Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ50paxTTA3X
努力，努力，努力。428Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9SzL0PPGLc
428Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGWLjnoDFm3
我的寫作技巧與日俱增，亦在多個學屆寫作比賽中獲獎。428Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVp8pvkdAmI
428Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjcbMnHmRzz
我以為自己將來鐵定能夠成為作家。428Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡz75F34FSfx
428Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlHbLYuISpP
以為。428Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtqrAGMBdJj
428Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoiaMkBPgDk
告別校園後，我成為一個普通文職。普通收入，普通打扮，普通生活。428Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT7R6HJdKkN
428Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx8hD8njxsi
普通得輕易被取代。普通得難以承受。428Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdKV5HifZ6l
428Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡS3b0EvnLbX
我不得不告訴自己我是多麼的有寫作天份！我是多麼的獨特！428Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPlVBQqCiyf
428Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMcJDmpzaPd
某夜下班回家，我泡了一壺水仙，乘著茶香全情投入寫作世界。沒有外物打擾，我的世界只有我。一切如願。那麼順心，那麼安寧，那麼快樂。428Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMuJqptG8yx
428Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWllNjPRiIB
我的作品感動了我。428Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh420CvMDxe
428Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhfAlPfRYjO
我希望藉此找到更多懂我的人。428Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0z3kXbhPDg
428Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQEEoWqOad2
幾十年來，不停寫，不停發表，不停被無視。我的世界與真實世界不斷相互碰撞。面對無止境的打擊，我不曾問自己為何堅持。因為一旦心生此等疑問，變相在內心種下「自我質疑」的根苗，一發不可收拾。428Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwRVFfZBMXh
428Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcBE86Zefu1
無法接受自己幾十年堅持建基於一個沒可能實現的夢想。428Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡk2EaaaNCcP
428Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5FklXpGWbv
無法承受自己生來就是如此普通、平凡、平庸……428Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjnAdwiwNqD
428Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnHknAN8RTd
熱茶又涼了。428Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmW7s1NSBP1
428Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡO1dPkTMILU
屏幕白頁上始終沒有片言隻字。428Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡF1Sme6kes1
428Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3y6TLgLk8M
老妻繼續以不表態維護我的尊嚴。428Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnjzuFYlbEj
428Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMHfdUo4ji1
我的作品只感動了我。428Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIX4ArPNsPu
428Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZj1uso0ZLz
因為我的感受只有我讀得懂。428Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8RTqH5xy4m
