
二十年前——560Please respect copyright.PENANA29phG6lQO0
560Please respect copyright.PENANATu6ypiHyi4
小荷是個人見人愛的六歲小女孩,胖胖白白的臉配上一雙水靈大眼。她每天穿著荷媽親手做的一雙由彩色布碎拼湊而成的小鞋子到處玩耍,有時會跟同村的孩子們跑上山頭採菇,有時會為獨居老人送上新鮮採摘的漂亮花朵,有時會在湖邊遊蕩。560Please respect copyright.PENANAN0HAd2MHGS
560Please respect copyright.PENANAeYWfxSD0m5
荷媽曾多次提醒她切勿走近湖邊,但小荷偏偏喜歡看蓮花,說蓮花是仙女的化身。荷媽忙著預備晚餐,不甚耐煩地反譏小荷幼稚。小荷不堪被譏諷,激動嚷著會帶蓮花仙女回家,然後頭也不回衝出家門。560Please respect copyright.PENANAbQBkKL9ur3
560Please respect copyright.PENANAlO2zq6VaJC
傍晚,晚餐備好了,小荷還沒有回家。荷媽心緒不寧,深怕小荷遇上意外。她挑燈外出,急步走往湖邊。560Please respect copyright.PENANAB7z8JPwhTj
560Please respect copyright.PENANA4ptG77uDWz
小荷不在。560Please respect copyright.PENANApdZp85QsAH
560Please respect copyright.PENANA7jWjUceklm
荷媽的心頭涼了大截,連忙前去村長家求助。沒多久,大伙兒在湖邊叢林間搜索。560Please respect copyright.PENANAvnZ5L9kp1o
560Please respect copyright.PENANAaylawAs8VV
無發現。560Please respect copyright.PENANAECGInDSEnb
560Please respect copyright.PENANAupUATfUM7d
村長打算重新部署搜索行動之際,有人指著湖中央的一朵蓮花大叫:「看!湖中那朵蓮花上有一隻鞋!」560Please respect copyright.PENANA3ix6XvyX8M
560Please respect copyright.PENANA0GChm5Csjp
大伙兒定睛細看,卻因光線不足而未能確定那是否一隻鞋。荷媽救女心切,不理眾人勸阻跳入湖中游向那朵蓮花。游著、游著,她的身影突然消失了。560Please respect copyright.PENANAWMwAtOSGGe
560Please respect copyright.PENANAxDXR3y8BnG
為免有更多人命犧牲,村民只得待天亮才落水找荷媽。不出所料,荷媽的腳踝被水草纏住,溺斃湖底。村民認得蓮花上的鞋子確是屬於小荷,但找遍湖底亦找不到她的身影。唯有繼續在林間搜索。無果。個多月後,眾人認為找到小荷的機會渺茫,於是停止搜索。560Please respect copyright.PENANARXwCXIqRkm
560Please respect copyright.PENANAbforpExzGy
村裡開始流傳蓮花仙女帶走小荷的傳聞……560Please respect copyright.PENANAWZ6Q9SHrHL
560Please respect copyright.PENANAqaA5LJLyrP
「那是在你出生前發生的事情?」阿夏一邊聽得著迷,一邊望著車窗外的油油綠草地,驚嘆著這寧靜山村背後竟有這種可怕事。560Please respect copyright.PENANAhhHCACJ3ZF
560Please respect copyright.PENANAQ4BCicyChH
「不。當年我十歲,和小荷挺熟絡。」芙兒沒心情欣賞風景,逕自倚著椅背,微微仰首凝視車廂天花那色調偏冷的米光燈。560Please respect copyright.PENANAjie0uOXNl2
560Please respect copyright.PENANAGuodwTQCmv
「小荷失蹤一事是你當警察的原因嗎?」阿夏與芙兒作伴數年,不難看出芙兒心事重重,尤其今趟「回鄉之旅」是離鄉別井十多年的芙兒主動提出,可見其別具意義。560Please respect copyright.PENANAVe2PI81JEh
560Please respect copyright.PENANAjF1AgJ2bQs
「嗯……一部份吧。不能說是完全因為她,也不能說是與這事情毫無關係。」芙兒苦笑,些許後悔無故主動提及這大煞風景的陳年往事。回鄉目的不是向各位鄉親苦老宣佈自己與阿夏的婚訊和設喜宴嗎?不是要歡天喜地、眉開眼笑嗎?560Please respect copyright.PENANAD1at5fyAF0
560Please respect copyright.PENANAFU549XCiOV
「不管如何……」阿夏是個聰明人,明明對案件內容細節有興趣,但也知道要適可宜止。他輕拍芙兒的手背,安慰道:「事情已然過去,多想無益。」560Please respect copyright.PENANAgyKZfRoBLW
560Please respect copyright.PENANAU2xi2STRca
「是的。過去了。」芙兒吁一口氣,似是釋懷,奈何揪心的感覺難以單憑幾句安慰說話連根拔起。560Please respect copyright.PENANAqUykyRoddW
560Please respect copyright.PENANAZD1ZewXytQ
顛著、簸著,好不容易來到村口。大城市發展一日千里,隱世小村亦逃不過時間巨輪的輾壓,已然根據政府的規劃建議打造成「山村旅遊區」。生來就是城市人的阿夏未曾到過農村,覺得這地方別具風味,但在村內待了十多年的芙兒卻嗤之以鼻:不也就是電視劇裡的假農村嗎?560Please respect copyright.PENANA1X1xIlpoqf
560Please respect copyright.PENANAEIKrJkukMS
驀地,一個想法在芙兒腦海掠過。560Please respect copyright.PENANABWA9QTwnhj
560Please respect copyright.PENANAaM55VpP6ut
「阿夏。」芙兒拉拉阿夏的手袖:「我們先去蓮花池那邊看看吧。」560Please respect copyright.PENANAw0E5iOzGIP
560Please respect copyright.PENANAC8qZ4nUr80
不出芙兒所料,蓮花池已面目全非。池邊的泥地與草叢變成了磚路與涼亭,上了漆的鐵製圍欄整齊繞池而立,蓮花換了個品種,顏色更亮麗奪目,尺寸亦比以往的大上數倍。唯一不變的是頭頂上的烈日,仍然熾熱得惡毒。560Please respect copyright.PENANA1RmVPn7Dt4
560Please respect copyright.PENANA9fgm6JSPmi
芙兒逕自繞著蓮花池逆時針方向拐圈踱步。時間彷彿隨著步伐逆行,日落月出,瞬間回到二十年前那個夜晚……560Please respect copyright.PENANAeCwV77uNDr
560Please respect copyright.PENANAyNDg861pnI
「我帶芙兒外出散步散心。」晚飯後,芙爸病懨懨地對妻子說。560Please respect copyright.PENANAOlKrVIKSRO
560Please respect copyright.PENANAE2McyMuiWJ
「嗯。」芙媽忙於照顧病兒,分身不暇。560Please respect copyright.PENANADtfku5Ukql
560Please respect copyright.PENANAseqFYruAVK
夏夜有月,月下有蟬,蟬聲擾人又煩人。路上,芙爸眉頭鎖得更深。芙兒乖乖不作聲,默默尾隨他快步走。560Please respect copyright.PENANA8A3ti3wavF
560Please respect copyright.PENANAwDYPJvzYNl
「芙兒,你愛媽媽嗎?」560Please respect copyright.PENANAqVoAxsWM2F
560Please respect copyright.PENANARhUS0Zvsol
「愛。」560Please respect copyright.PENANASiHxLdWZak
560Please respect copyright.PENANAL6H1qHSFSd
「你愛爸爸嗎?」560Please respect copyright.PENANATwbqt2GlSS
560Please respect copyright.PENANAh3yYv3B60g
「愛。」560Please respect copyright.PENANApsyhwQ7BuG
560Please respect copyright.PENANAKMzuqCrQLV
「你愛哥哥嗎?」560Please respect copyright.PENANAaP4AZvHgYg
560Please respect copyright.PENANAhyhvaBOYkM
芙兒心裡一寒,不自已停下腳步——她早前無意間發現爸爸向前任村長秘密查詢有關人口販子的事。難道爸爸為了替哥哥籌措醫藥費而打算賣掉她?560Please respect copyright.PENANAipSYpAPmox
560Please respect copyright.PENANA08BAoKGNtH
「你愛我嗎?」芙兒無力反問。560Please respect copyright.PENANANBnKqZ7jr9
560Please respect copyright.PENANAzKrZ5So6Qi
芙爸沒有回答,繼續低頭開步走。560Please respect copyright.PENANATt3dbsc2RF
560Please respect copyright.PENANA8IhtIqwhuR
芙兒想要跑回家去,雙腳卻不由自主隨著爸爸走,縱然明知那是不歸路。560Please respect copyright.PENANAu9PsaSVLKm
560Please respect copyright.PENANAQEdkJdLtdD
途經蓮花池,巧遇小荷。芙爸倏忽衝前打昏小荷。芙兒明白爸爸的意圖,連忙拉住他。560Please respect copyright.PENANAAHY6kKkI3O
560Please respect copyright.PENANA3Swf7JXa5Q
「小荷是無辜的!」560Please respect copyright.PENANAqfOU25JRcX
560Please respect copyright.PENANAZezNKMsb26
「但我捨不得你啊!」560Please respect copyright.PENANA7CMiPmM0JO
560Please respect copyright.PENANAjFCvPnru7i
芙兒不期然鬆開了手——她聽得出話裡的割捨與堅決。爸爸向來善良老實,日子艱難亦不會做鼠竊狗偷的勾當。奈何今次關乎兒子的生命安危和女兒的命運!他寧可割捨良知,亦要保住家人。560Please respect copyright.PENANAQfhJoPcc48
560Please respect copyright.PENANALCHAhssLNc
芙兒理解了、妥協了,芙爸眼神反倒更為悲憤不安。他脫下小荷的一隻鞋,使勁拋向蓮花池。鞋子剛好不偏不倚落在池中央的一朵大蓮花上。560Please respect copyright.PENANABUFG6vTCRz
560Please respect copyright.PENANA74xqMP4Bx7
父女兩人不約而同望向那朵大蓮花。純白蓮花被夜色沾污成帶有瘀青的淡灰色,悉才看來色彩繽紛的小鞋子亦被迫融入夜色,成了一個若隱若現的小黑點。560Please respect copyright.PENANA8NOuRPy2Va
560Please respect copyright.PENANACoj6HaCmBY
小黑點,人生裡的大污點。560Please respect copyright.PENANAD84VkjYXtp
560Please respect copyright.PENANAgSVxi2SVz3
來到約定的地方。人口販子沒有芙兒想像中的鼠頭獐目。他相貌平凡,打扮平凡,舉止平凡,有如田裡的一顆穀粒,獨一無二卻平凡普通。560Please respect copyright.PENANAJZRe1Oqr4v
560Please respect copyright.PENANACAa7PDx1g2
二人無聲的奉上小荷,默默的收下金錢,不能見光的交易在無光的樹林中順利完成。560Please respect copyright.PENANAt061X28xG7
560Please respect copyright.PENANADVgkIEYJ2P
芙兒自此在這夜池邊中無限輪迴。560Please respect copyright.PENANASpn22Lrcux
560Please respect copyright.PENANAk2S1vFxAgj
晝如夜,夜是夜。此人是小荷,那人是小荷,異裝同臉。池中有蓮,家中有蓮,路中有蓮,蓮上有鞋。560Please respect copyright.PENANA30EXdyao8G
560Please respect copyright.PENANADctwUWfucK
瘋了。芙兒的世界瘋了。560Please respect copyright.PENANA5pzlqe3u94
560Please respect copyright.PENANAl9ndH01IRg
需要救贖。無人能救。只得自救。560Please respect copyright.PENANAoWzhHdBTXM
560Please respect copyright.PENANArmtWdhOtYh
救哥哥,犧牲小荷。救自己,犧牲誰?560Please respect copyright.PENANAItD599XPAa
560Please respect copyright.PENANADdzTaDOj09
「記住,賣掉小荷的人是我,不是你。」560Please respect copyright.PENANARrNil3pSpS
560Please respect copyright.PENANAdUvasIMopj
「我沒有阻止你。」560Please respect copyright.PENANASm1jTxPuVg
560Please respect copyright.PENANA24L2klFoJr
「阻止得了麼?」560Please respect copyright.PENANAfRfe1KKBAc
560Please respect copyright.PENANAaFefv3ueYO
「至少,我該要嘗試。」560Please respect copyright.PENANAMi4yYBzcF1
560Please respect copyright.PENANAcrYBR5fSIB
「嘗試有用麼?」560Please respect copyright.PENANAh7KoHavqou
560Please respect copyright.PENANAnsvYNpSANv
芙兒如夢初醒——芙爸企圖獨自扛起一切責任,救贖芙兒。她不自控笑著流淚,內心得到救贖的同時又跌落另一深淵——自己得救,爸爸犧牲。560Please respect copyright.PENANA9L87vyX7q1
560Please respect copyright.PENANAUBUGU84zz1
真的得到了救贖嗎?不肯定。560Please respect copyright.PENANABRiMmlBVzV
560Please respect copyright.PENANAHUiWO0QWnW
她離鄉到城市尋找工作,輾轉當上警察。對失蹤案尤感興趣。找人,找救贖。找到人,找不到救贖。560Please respect copyright.PENANA4UYNFrZ9Xd
560Please respect copyright.PENANA3tZMykKVaz
收到來自家鄉的信,提及哥哥病逝。她丟掉信件,假裝未曾收到。根本沒意義,根本誰也沒能得救,無論犧牲多大。560Please respect copyright.PENANA7caE1QsV2k
560Please respect copyright.PENANAQUSmkz0sYK
芙媽來了,問芙兒為何不出席哥哥的喪禮。她說不知道哥哥逝世一事。芙媽低頭掩面大笑,笑了很久,然後哭了很久。「你爸說你不會為此回來,我說你不是狠心的人。原來我們都錯了——你根本不知情。」560Please respect copyright.PENANAxFhu6qkI45
560Please respect copyright.PENANAa8fRJGTyIc
有甚麼值得笑或哭?芙兒不明白。或許媽媽也不明白,純粹為笑而笑、為哭而哭,無謂卻有為。至少她的情緒得以紓緩,面容不再繃緊。560Please respect copyright.PENANAVodIj52JMv
560Please respect copyright.PENANAkp6UmuZev5
數年後,芙媽死了。芙兒同樣沒有出席喪禮。她向上司請假數天,躲在家裡,足不出戶。不斷憶起媽媽當日又哭又笑的癲狂模樣。真羨慕。沒有隱藏,沒有秘密。560Please respect copyright.PENANADqg4MBILQM
560Please respect copyright.PENANAsnnD1txTcL
假期完結後,芙兒重投工作。警局來了一個新丁,名叫阿夏,比芙兒年輕數載。他長有一張孩子臉,胖胖白白,水靈大眼,像小荷。芙兒的目光離不開阿夏,主動接近他、勾搭他。二人由相識至同睡一床,僅是三天內的事。560Please respect copyright.PENANA2NyGbbccSr
560Please respect copyright.PENANAmPYvN5RjSR
阿夏不解。560Please respect copyright.PENANAOmpEFIw8ep
560Please respect copyright.PENANASMroLPoUmP
「你不似是水性楊花的女人。」560Please respect copyright.PENANALfxlQgBgjr
560Please respect copyright.PENANAqhpJDxOWlv
「你不似是諸事八卦的男人。」560Please respect copyright.PENANAmgfkAZF4wB
560Please respect copyright.PENANAIMV3XqGpZW
阿夏開始追求芙兒。芙兒不接受,卻偶爾與他同睡。為何不愛他卻會與他睡?是發洩,是鬱悶,或是對往事的情感投射?芙兒解釋不了,亦不想解釋——找到解釋之時,另一個問題就會隨即出現。560Please respect copyright.PENANAqIH7zEazCn
560Please respect copyright.PENANAWHoeXDhrC4
繼續同睡,繼續被追求,繼續找人找救贖。生活不過如此,平平凡凡,無無謂謂。560Please respect copyright.PENANAHQVmv879vl
560Please respect copyright.PENANA0dWjrEkPd6
數年後的某天,芙兒收到來自兒時鄰居的一通電話。對方說芙爸病重,行將就木,希望她回鄉探望。560Please respect copyright.PENANAI9qskBoSCc
560Please respect copyright.PENANAE5RbEK1XVN
「是他希望我回去,或是大家希望我回去探望他?」560Please respect copyright.PENANAsUJ3iYsvzf
560Please respect copyright.PENANA4ttUNegWSR
「他堅持不要通知你,但大家還是決定要告訴你。」560Please respect copyright.PENANADcv1fLaRTg
560Please respect copyright.PENANAeZHiNNj09e
「我明白了。」560Please respect copyright.PENANApZYU6qRaxv
560Please respect copyright.PENANAHqfz7V2okw
當晚,芙兒跟阿夏說要盡快回鄉宣佈婚訊、設喜宴。560Please respect copyright.PENANAVN4RmipnmD
560Please respect copyright.PENANAc3FEjCLi0J
「你跟誰結婚?」阿夏詫異。560Please respect copyright.PENANARIDKzTCEGP
560Please respect copyright.PENANAeTUU7QDgrn
「你。」芙兒明白阿夏的不明白。560Please respect copyright.PENANAT2TIEEqv1F
560Please respect copyright.PENANAo8dalOeOCv
顛著、簸著,好不容易來到村口。大城市發展一日千里,隱世小村亦逃不過時間巨輪的輾壓,已然根據政府的規劃建議打造成「山村旅遊區」。生來就是城市人的阿夏未曾到過農村,覺得這地方別具風味,但在村內待了十多年的芙兒卻嗤之以鼻:不也就是電視劇裡的假農村嗎?560Please respect copyright.PENANADD7h2r1w22
560Please respect copyright.PENANALWy2ChOJby
驀地,一個想法在芙兒腦海掠過。560Please respect copyright.PENANA4Q1JqBMA4L
560Please respect copyright.PENANAOKrz39LOuj
「阿夏。」芙兒拉拉阿夏的手袖:「我們先去蓮花池那邊看看吧。」560Please respect copyright.PENANAbqEwTTdTTQ
560Please respect copyright.PENANA0F5lgABe9C
不出芙兒所料,蓮花池已面目全非。池邊的泥地與草叢變成了磚路與涼亭,上了漆的鐵製圍欄整齊繞池而立,蓮花換了個品種,顏色更亮麗奪目,尺寸亦比以往的大上數倍。唯一不變的是頭頂上的烈日,仍然熾熱得惡毒。560Please respect copyright.PENANA6toGDNDUPU
560Please respect copyright.PENANAHVts0cq0yf
芙兒逕自繞著蓮花池逆時針方向拐圈踱步。踱踱踱,時間有可能隨著步伐逆轉,帶她回到二十年前的那個晚上嗎?若明知結果,她還是會不阻止爸爸賣掉小荷嗎?560Please respect copyright.PENANA58E5EwZNrw
560Please respect copyright.PENANA3haHTJn0mr
老家陋宅裡,趁著阿夏上廁所的空檔,芙兒湊近芙爸耳邊直接問:「若明知結果,你還是會賣掉小荷嗎?」560Please respect copyright.PENANAhPpvtxCNt0
560Please respect copyright.PENANAYQzgHniTg6
「會。」氣若柔絲的芙爸斬釘截鐵:「因為我是當爸的。」560Please respect copyright.PENANAct38tHJvje
560Please respect copyright.PENANAi8nvT3frvd
「若沒有遇上小荷,你會賣掉我嗎?」560Please respect copyright.PENANAomr9JRTgjk
560Please respect copyright.PENANA1eKywqXu8c
「會。因為你們兄妹倆都會活著。活著才會有希望。」560Please respect copyright.PENANAeHtQZTguwF
560Please respect copyright.PENANAC08M1KnxcW
芙兒大受刺激,轉身奪門而出。560Please respect copyright.PENANAfeHCnWjERE
560Please respect copyright.PENANAhEW8O8ecAu
夏夜有月,月下有蟬,蟬聲擾人又煩人。路上行人疏落,卻異裝同臉,小荷的臉。路中倏忽生出白蓮朵朵,蓮上皆有小彩鞋一隻。芙兒知道自己瘋了,眼前盡是幻覺。理智脫軌,她不再恐懼,像個十歲的少女那樣跳脫輕盈,一步踏一蓮,來到池邊。560Please respect copyright.PENANAnXUBaDE8NQ
560Please respect copyright.PENANAnLjYYvdF2m
池邊有人,像小荷,像芙爸,像人口販子,像阿夏。她握著一隻彩色小鞋,木無表情直盯池中那朵大蓮花。芙兒走近女子,女子報以微笑,遞上手中小鞋。560Please respect copyright.PENANATWkjgBxSxE
560Please respect copyright.PENANAYRlIc6texw
芙兒接過它,模仿爸爸當晚的姿勢,以完美的拋物線弧度拋出小鞋。小鞋不偏不倚剛好落在池中央的蓮花上,有如二十年前的那夜。純白蓮花被夜色沾污成帶有瘀青的淡灰色,悉才看來色彩繽紛的小鞋子亦被迫融入夜色,成了一個若隱若現的小黑點。560Please respect copyright.PENANAK2f7vrsFp2
560Please respect copyright.PENANASUFgRrg8n9
女人哈哈大笑起來,笑聲豁然開朗。芙兒腳下的白蓮和小鞋驀地消失隱去,唯獨女子依然完好站在面前。笑過以後,女子轉身離開,身影沒入林間不復見。560Please respect copyright.PENANAOLe6tI5uGq
560Please respect copyright.PENANADg80RPd5ir
芙兒惘然——她不肯定對方是幻覺或是確切存在的真人。560Please respect copyright.PENANAi1MjkVRYBf
560Please respect copyright.PENANAeGzE48kB2W
數日後,芙爸與世長辭。560Please respect copyright.PENANAIjWRn7pzlA
560Please respect copyright.PENANAH26QAyYIl4
「既然不需要沖喜,你還會跟我結婚嗎?」560Please respect copyright.PENANAXEqkevJYFs
560Please respect copyright.PENANAwCPnAU1qjJ
「你想跟我結婚嗎?」560Please respect copyright.PENANArd8jhlHlYF
560Please respect copyright.PENANA5jeX0G2Vql
「想。我愛你。」560Please respect copyright.PENANAyeUpBRdaEu
560Please respect copyright.PENANAPO8AWufvod
「那就繼續吧。」560Please respect copyright.PENANAbaYknUBXap
560Please respect copyright.PENANA2Q9RxUCRKh
喜慶夜,大排筵席。此人是小荷,那人是小荷,新郎是小荷,老爺是小荷,奶奶是小荷,滿堂皆是小荷。芙兒帶醉喜極而泣,感激小荷前來祝福她。560Please respect copyright.PENANAPtlfQOuMYR
560Please respect copyright.PENANA8IoAIoPNzY
宴後,賓客散去。醉得幾近失去意識的芙兒被攙扶到新房去。滾燙的臉龐忽爾涼涼的。她知道有人為她用濕毛巾抹臉抹汗。560Please respect copyright.PENANA2M2ioWKx6M
560Please respect copyright.PENANApxkky0RgIc
「謝謝你……小荷……」560Please respect copyright.PENANAmC2D90SNvl
560Please respect copyright.PENANAvCNCBgW3J1
「不用客氣……」560Please respect copyright.PENANA1e0q0XgiEU
560Please respect copyright.PENANAbK5R0bhKt9
說著說著,阿夏哭了。晶瑩淚水沿著胖白的臉頰下滑,水靈大眼楚楚可憐。像小荷。