我和傾姐坐在沙發上，一同蓋在被子下。675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡytNdPFPWJF
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1RpsnyzyQ9
拉上被子，右手拿出麥提莎，放進口裡。675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIeBoBo7w53
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPmcoQbuhD6
「咬下——」明白了。675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2w0rhZSKcl
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ197CWBXCFh
目前，我知道了她和蔣少的關係。基本上，蔣家和家裡給予她的壓力，使她過著一個沒有自由的人生。675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp19QTLS1cH
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMkOgJhYXqG
難怪，她會向神許願，祈求能夠脫離現有的生活。675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuMNziKxXqy
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi41d8OhsPi
脫離現有的生活？慢著，那不正是我做過的，最誇張的一件事嗎？675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkyK5CCk2zh
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEMrypTcwbg
封閉自己的內心，流落孤島，徹底地脫離原本的生活。675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkGQEeGwe3A
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw9bKvyH5et
神是不是故意的？675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxpmQQ3jkmi
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN7kJ0E0z8Z
竟然……安排這種測試給我。675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqWVSAh7IcC
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwTsuAzQUlr
我望望時鐘，時間奇怪了。675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLJyxSONw0Y
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZeiJu5Wl74
牆上時鐘還沒到達兩點，顯示著一個奇怪的時間。675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGTmERfLDau
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb7QoK2m6xG
「雖然你好想幫我，但其實我唔係一個值得幫嘅女仔嚟。」傾姐訴說。675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEvoUdhe9HV
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZJ66wi3oZp
「點解咁講？」我問，準備再取下一粒。675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIQCK9Y2del
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJDJ2hDKFrn
「因為欺凌同學嘅人，唔止得蔣少，我都有份。」她自白。675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnXn9PXeSmU
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGZIgxyX8Wq
「唔止有份，我仲縱容陳菲菲佢地去蝦其他人。」她繼續說，「就好似之前，要逼李可兒除底褲咁。」675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡs9wMlgIQlm
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzj3fqL7ws6
「我做過嘅壞事，一啲都唔少。」她說，「如果唔係，啲人都唔會咁驚我，我都唔會有傾姐今日嘅地位。」675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjsR3WB6ntK
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkSKrm7ON64
「有一次，中六蔣少啲friend想約女仔出去玩，希望我介紹幾個畀佢地，我都介紹咗。」她黯然說，「雖然……我明知會發生咩事。」675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡn4SUBLkeHW
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡL225xb4Abe
「唔好再講喇。」我說。675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbXa4uNUFhR
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4BYsUS5PCe
「如果你係想幫我嘅，至少，我想你知道真正嘅陸傾兒係一個咩人。」她認真地說。675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkwl6MnuaeO
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAUMFd7CZCq
然後我沒有再阻止她。675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9UMAAglych
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjBWyOvooGR
讓她一直說著自己的壞，說著自己欺負了多少人，威脅了多少人，傷害過多少人。675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoZ6ZOv5Dgt
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmFV6zDkg19
聽著，我聽到了熟悉的聲音。675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlKJEMDUp4h
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9BLKzYstfa
不是我也做過這些事，而是我也說過這些話，一些自責的話。675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7yDllujXfY
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡODcevBlkmi
透過用言語來責罰自己，讓自己好過一點。675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzAOtzL9cZD
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDebusL4QyI
除此之外，在寂靜的夜裡，受著海風的吹襲，以虐待自己的方式來受罰；透過惡言惡語，破壞別人對自己的印象，讓別人討厭自己，也是懲罰自己的方式。675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZUnVp4ldIs
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡk3KdyBblUu
如今她正企圖破壞自己的形象，破壞她在我心中的印象。彷彿期望著我拒絕她，同時又期盼著我接受這樣的她。675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlSDGKPWnXQ
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBtspyLzUUE
聽著，聽著，聽見了哽咽。675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlUR97qTpjs
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5SErJ75IEe
「Sorry。」她垂下頭，「你聽完，覺得點……仲想唔想幫我？」675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡar42MICpKY
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzXfpSASbiH
「定係……」她自我形象低落，幾乎抽泣，「你已經想即刻趕我走？」675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdsiSvxIv8Z
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkyRl6adBWq
「做咩唔講嘢？」她問，終於望向我，「喂……」675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe1vQwjWeag
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJu4XGXt2Jz
我也正在難過。675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUF5oCSsuB4
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfJRijLMNVM
「啜泣……」我哭了，抹抹眼睛，「Sorry.。」675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6IAhWNqtxa
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8iBMCBgBpT
「你做咩喊？」傾姐問。675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoq666O78rl
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPdq6RYFRph
「因為我好擔心你。」我照直說。675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtBMl5Zdk8Z
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVZGD3ARJpT
「點解？」她問。675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ91gPJIsmOk
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCbuWPuksYg
怕你走上跟我一樣的路。675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIV9ARpwOej
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjHcx28mlQE
「我驚你太過自責，之後會做傻事。」我說。675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiZ5XUIG1vN
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9fT2qxP3SQ
同是做壞事的人，同是不原諒自己的人。675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHfh5H1gAAh
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡo1oHsrtdpN
但是困在孤島的人、封閉內心的人，有我一個就夠了。675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5ga7Zo3BsB
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpOHEB3qRbk
「我亦都好感動，你肯講畀我知。」我說，收住了淚。675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh5KT1TOPpL
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGLS0mDlJA3
只要說了出來，就不會鎖在心上了。675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXwblSPEfPW
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡo4CAioxDOB
「其實我已經做緊傻事。」陸傾兒說，「我上網識男仔，或者可能……都期望緊會發生意外。」675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxZgyrRjGCa
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLBJiPKcNzJ
「如果我畀人非禮、姦咗，出咗醜聞，蔣少一家人可能就唔會再鍾意我，我就可以解脫……」她說，「從此唔再需要理屋企人嘅指示。」675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8NVYNa3MXP
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡL9a0BKwI9Q
這是……什麼爛方法？675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE3LBSKEVZr
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG1mpkYPLGY
即使要折磨自己，也不是這樣的吧！675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxrn686ghwN
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0nI7xpA7P9
在被子裡的手，握緊了拳。675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1SiUDx9Qfd
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRd1tHexs9U
「哩個都係一個方法嚟嘅。」我漠然地說，「只係，有一個條件。」675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMy6Q0ofnft
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaQ393lQMG8
「咩條件？」她問。675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ1C1x0g320
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7xKDHjWpYz
「搞你嗰個人，要係我。」我說，「除我之外嘅人，你諗都唔好諗。」675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhy0HXjOPQv
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEu4cAaNnPe
陸傾兒笑了，哈哈地笑了。675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlmF4WBoapU
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOKUXQ36siz
「點解？你同其他人有咩分別？點解要係你先得？」她笑著，笑容漸漸僵硬。675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCKnCskQowr
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQv8vqQUyCI
「因為其他男人搞完你，就唔會理你，而我會繼續幫你。」我說，「雖然我未必可以長期係你身邊……」675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUUktDOy1Jq
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGRqCYLAJNJ
但即使我身在遠方，我都一樣會擔心著你，為你的人生而牽掛。675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8Y0tWhjQbU
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLeREkCYfHH
「你可以點幫我？」她問，「撇除哩個方法唔計，你有咩方法幫到我？」675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1vv7CzqQ8Y
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHZNhaZSm3t
「我已經答咗你好多問題，你已經知道咗我好多嘢。」她繼續說。675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEvy0mpNhGz
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbPXWYVqeJA
「孫正直，你可以點幫我？點幫陸傾兒？」她問，很想知道。675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJvxaFYj9JF
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbw0wllNf20
鬆開了麥提莎，我輕放在地上。675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgQEcNfae45
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJKgnUqR0W8
「我唔係神，冇可能幫你解決所有問題。」我說。675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLkcK2dHN9n
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwSRkwn7VXL
「咁你可以點幫我？」她追問。675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxQXl6PaTRr
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuwcHQZhNAN
她遇上的困境，不是耍一點小聰明就可以解決的。675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡygHU7hZWBE
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrXJe8ZyDOO
也不是叫她離家出走、自食其力、無視家人等，就可以過上美好的生活。675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNMIfRSM8C7
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAXmszcrD3s
「我都冇咩方法可以幫你。」我說，淚水情不自禁，「但係……」675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD6NSgnpmyE
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe3ONn2UmQO
「當你凍嘅時候，我會幫你戴一條頸巾。當你想講嘢嘅時候，我會靜靜地咁聽。當你想喊嘅時候，我可以借個膊頭畀你。」675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLzRX2CIDQM
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQ0Xl2Xht6F
「今晚嘅我，只係可以……今晚嘅我只可以……做到咁。」我抽泣地說，「對唔住。」675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtOPmiSb2Qu
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWwP72q4Ttn
說完，她聽完。675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCXnuRLdzK5
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpxPWR05jB2
「明白，我明白。」她說，「好多謝你今晚可以陪我，好多謝你，可以為我喊。」675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYgQlneoFVb
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvbsZXWPUVA
「我成世女，都冇人為我喊過。」她誠懇地說，準備離開，「好多謝你，孫正直，我有少少感動。」675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvqf6oKDyre
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuDjxKGwCUw
等等，時間還沒到兩點，仍然是1點35分而已。675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoZmMs7phNx
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiiWMRAJvWa
「你係第一個為陸傾兒喊嘅人。」她看著我說，「你值得我，畀一個獎勵你。」675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcDB9FpCDGW
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8Cc0y2owhw
被子從她身上落下，露出了她的頸巾、衣服，和手上的電池。675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoIGzTJMqYe
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNin3OuOfog
「個鐘粒電，我係你去廁所嗰時拆咗。」她還給我，「唔好意思，因為哩個係唯一阻止時間流逝嘅方法。」675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡClIHJOjYdv
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDrUYOQr6BS
「但我依加要走喇。」她說，「實在太夜喇，聽朝仲要早起。」675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnwWsu25R8D
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ02ePyj5hjx
「陸傾兒……」我說。675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLVBiYDDHps
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEnp3tKDccj
「我畀你揀啦，一個獎勵，當最後一回合係我輸咗，而我揀大膽。」她睄一眼空酒瓶。675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTiaKsXHT1O
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVaTmu4Ytbr
「揀咩都得？」我問。675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBBfKRdvzoD
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡV19ou3jxX8
「你揀之前，我仲想講一樣嘢就係，你雪櫃根本有勁多啤酒，我搵到嘅開瓶器，就係係你雪櫃個蛋格到搵到。」她說，「但你唔想我飲，寧願呃我話冇酒。」675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAmY5qyfpx3
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBad18i3kKV
「哩個世界點解會有你哩啲咁嘅人？」她泛淚，卻微笑。675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1EmoVwxsDO
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡI2Kz3zsIDw
而我不懂回答。675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡy8zbO95G5J
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6OPKHaZIoz
我是知道有酒的，昨天就知道了。我也知道時鐘被拆了電池，只是不說破而已。我猜她也知道我知道，才會在默契之下，延長了時間。675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9XXDuEsQGs
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFfrLAPWYK6
「陸傾兒，我揀……」我準備說。675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdhVYwJNDbW
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJP0mHIOQ3B
「你會唔會想揀錫我一啖？」她先說，站在我的面前。675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMYYrY1V4vv
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdBkKck6zhn
我展露微笑，問，「你覺得我敢唔敢？敢唔敢揀哩樣？同傾姐錫一啖。」675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEgo51Nn7hI
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0w1KFRxE2u
「視乎你驚唔驚死。」她說。675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYbr0obZq3y
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡM7r4yKZB5X
「我驚死，我當然驚死。」我說，慢慢翻開被子。675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ05OGSNAkUi
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWQN923h1MG
「但唔係今晚。」我也選了大膽。675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJFiDJJSBqM
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBj3YlInsph
過後——675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEYOy4kjXiY
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJqaG85gNc6
沙發上只留下一條米黃淺啡間條頸巾。675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPCGDtecULz
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9dcx85yCGS
屁股坐下。675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLz4H2rrRdf
675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGZPIEx7rIl
還有開了一瓶啤酒的我。675Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKRdIVZDQd4
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