事情要回到幾個月前。386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡC1etyGviqC
386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdXPUpRTEid
「豺姐，我想跟妳道歉。」386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDLXH3SMXPd
386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqPwtTy9t8Y
聊著聊著，他突然傳來這樣的訊息。386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmvnHiatpqa
386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSxvuQi6SaZ
「幹嘛道歉？」386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQ8QASiYnlR
386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD550fhAqno
「前一陣子，是不是有人密妳的skype，問妳想不想穿高跟鞋踩他？」386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4UkU6JJfRC
386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLoScVN8jg5
我想了一下，好像有這麼回事。386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUFClsVW4Oo
386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvWyhWRZMSG
「那個人就是我，但我應該馬上就被妳封鎖了吧？」386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtdQMRFzzGC
386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhxm37XilE9
「呃，因為skype是個常常會被陌生人亂加的程式，所以看到奇怪的訊息，我都是直接封鎖啊。」386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡn5l9PZWfX3
386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWn9KueqK7R
「拜託妳現在不要封鎖我。」386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh6us1j0ipO
386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvQUIRhFK77
「不會啊，都是朋友了還鎖什麼，不過你是在惡作劇嗎？」386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXdUxd5gIIy
386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjPXOW5yGhc
「不是。」386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjRu3OOeaEH
386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7INjQNL5rn
然後，他開始和我說起，他的秘密。386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡz7T5ahoPwF
386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpdXmyxlv4X
作為一個M，又稱「臣服者」（也有人說是「受虐者」，但我不喜歡這個稱呼），加上「戀物」及「戀足」，他從很久以前，就知道自己的喜好及性傾向，但沒有讓人知道，包括以前交的女朋友。386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTtqkpq80YQ
386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyvtQYGWoUy
看到高跟鞋會興奮，產生被虐的幻想；女孩子只要稍微兇他，他也會心癢，更別說是聽到一些汙辱謾罵的詞彙了，那只會讓他更高興。
在他意識到自己的性傾向時，還是個小孩。他下意識的覺得自己不正常，隨之而來的厭惡自己及沮喪情緒很快吞沒了他。386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡc3TlnS0D1K
386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡExuBPW3hIO
所以他掩飾、逃避，逼自己過「正常人」的生活及性生活。
直到過了幾年，進入資訊爆炸的時代，Google大神開始顯神威，在網路上發現同好的時候，他才漸漸接受自己。386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMcN3wEGegt
386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkY0XKhQgzx
「只是接受了自己，不代表別人肯接受這樣的我。」386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIoQxetqrsF
386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeQmsO8pSwY
所以他還是持續隱瞞這件事，也許是過於刻意隱瞞，在戀愛的過程中，他反而像個大男人，所交到的女朋友，也都是小女人類型的，這讓他更不可能坦白自己了。386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBACLDSpUU4
386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXnGPBzgQ0f
那天晚上，我幾乎聽完了他到目前為止的人生。386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwVS0v4cTuV
386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQCSfBGIcUZ
「壓抑」，若要下個結論，就只有這兩個字。386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsov9Bo1s4J
386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡM5tN57ihKz
386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡctdd2HYvb5
「為什麼告訴我？」
不過是朋友的朋友，一群朋友一起出去過幾次，我真的不認為我們有那麼熟。386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcGP12zhRkz
386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAV2gYaVylH
「我信任妳。」386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ51XQl32sGr
386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoEwIorLCs2
「噗，你也太容易相信別人了吧，萬一我是大嘴巴咧。」386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMUTQE58ozJ
386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡojL0qr6cJM
「妳應該不是。」386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡctetMRHzlI
386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDQHFRcHENz
「這麼有信心？」386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIyisUBJ44n
386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8W5FH1WTRz
「有一次去唱歌，那個誰不是在說某個人的八卦嗎，說她和哪個歌手有一腿，還墮胎怎麼的。」386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK3q3x6oky0
386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡABdDinQ3MI
「嗯？」386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡem2AXdYhHE
386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhX8gaK26OJ
「妳本來在跟大家聊天，聊到這個就自己喝起酒來，也不搭話。我記得那個當事者跟妳有過節。」386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsfshSqa509
386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ74AiD1UdU5
「是有一些無聊的過節，你怎麼會知道？」386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmDSAlDqc1x
386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRBlr72YiXu
「因為別人是大嘴巴。可是妳當時什麼都沒說，也不參與話題，所以我信妳。」386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMIZFFtZluV
386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsGa4YxWRMs
竟然被偷偷觀察了啊。386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5HRy5cBgFH
386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsln0ZeIGjV
「說不定我只是口渴了想喝酒啊。」386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe0btfO9g7j
386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡts4frvZgTa
「妳是大嘴巴嗎？」386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuWzCqhf2N2
386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK2tGDo3ivc
「我不是，但你的故事可能會成為我的創作題材。」386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOg77w9S0QY
386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ53i7cC4Jag
「哈哈哈。」386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyFojqWAsZI
386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡI0lc7NP15V
「哈哈。」386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8vKprBzCmV
386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNc1l2BsuSa
386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcqEI3XQopH
386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxqeplQpgpb
他捧著高跟鞋，或許是我的錯覺，他的手彷彿在微微的顫抖。386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCS0JvyfkfA
386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZfoiAUKkFx
我看著他小心翼翼的，將自己的臉側過，慢慢的貼在鞋頭的鞋面上，一秒，兩秒，三秒，然後離開它，看了看鞋，抬頭，盯著我。386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡccwy9xxWBC
386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQT8pEpCk5o
他放下高跟鞋，頭低著，對我伸出手。386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyKQ04CkN0P
386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡW0FUrKSQOP
我有點緊張，所以動作也很遲鈍。386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8yY3XZtvQa
386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2MkELb5Ye1
把右腳放進他手裡的時候，我意識到自己的雙手緊捏著床沿。386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlt33udYg7n
386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXkQatkdlE4
他微微抬頭，眼神落在我的腳背上。386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ20avJeXwqL
386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡL4JiZ3MlDH
就像電影裡演的紳士，在女士的手背親吻那樣，他也這麼做了，只是把手換成腳。386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFmwDRcCxeu
386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwAmBVJcFMc
他輕輕地吻了我的腳背，就一下子，沒有停留，沒有聲響，我也沒有感到不舒服。386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu5e3Iweg16
386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTNlNAMlbki
他拿起高跟鞋，從我的腳尖套上，再合上腳跟，確認高跟鞋穿好後，放下我的右腳。386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkFtGhTvnMq
386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0cUP4PVKu3
接著，換左腳。386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqJhiwkDR6Z
386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡomPQtknJy9
因為他的動作一直很溫柔，所以我的緊張感消失了大半。386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ6aIccttGB
386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡogq3BJkDc9
同樣的模式（或儀式）結束後，我的雙腳都穿上了高跟鞋，而他恢復了原本的姿勢，低著頭，跪著。386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRwsQCL1TYY
386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhtb2vObaUm
「頭抬起來。」我說。386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbJAYE4YA51
386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwxyTsw2NNo
命令的語氣。386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNzrD8oKPT8
386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6WxZnQ2gfK
386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡl7wQ7YqMrY
386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbDZVFwGO9Y
待續。386Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0Ual0ipk5M
