事情要回到幾個月前。394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIGxSwqzv7z
394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡU64EKKcj1l
「豺姐，我想跟妳道歉。」394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBnsHCsOUVo
394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0JzMMq3Ju4
聊著聊著，他突然傳來這樣的訊息。394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaV8AKAgoPI
394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOM65M55zI5
「幹嘛道歉？」394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFubfbQDfbI
394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOxxTSbDVbS
「前一陣子，是不是有人密妳的skype，問妳想不想穿高跟鞋踩他？」394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsmxw95fI2y
394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnnggNqf4CG
我想了一下，好像有這麼回事。394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡepoOUPgf8u
394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLPNynwiRlz
「那個人就是我，但我應該馬上就被妳封鎖了吧？」394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡL1pT5rrrbB
394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVmwOdkDIB2
「呃，因為skype是個常常會被陌生人亂加的程式，所以看到奇怪的訊息，我都是直接封鎖啊。」394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUSkbwy3cqI
394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDwZcZa3heA
「拜託妳現在不要封鎖我。」394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsLjsUmKd2o
394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPBkMqPzj3i
「不會啊，都是朋友了還鎖什麼，不過你是在惡作劇嗎？」394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuwG1Y34WqU
394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlvtA2nmcnY
「不是。」394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ12P4NfSmxe
394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ62GaLzNgZx
然後，他開始和我說起，他的秘密。394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHuFt8GzFyn
394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpA6xv8p1LQ
作為一個M，又稱「臣服者」（也有人說是「受虐者」，但我不喜歡這個稱呼），加上「戀物」及「戀足」，他從很久以前，就知道自己的喜好及性傾向，但沒有讓人知道，包括以前交的女朋友。394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgumIoFvYQa
394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTnlafBKgiF
看到高跟鞋會興奮，產生被虐的幻想；女孩子只要稍微兇他，他也會心癢，更別說是聽到一些汙辱謾罵的詞彙了，那只會讓他更高興。
在他意識到自己的性傾向時，還是個小孩。他下意識的覺得自己不正常，隨之而來的厭惡自己及沮喪情緒很快吞沒了他。394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvbvXNmntVS
394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWg6wiM2MqF
所以他掩飾、逃避，逼自己過「正常人」的生活及性生活。
直到過了幾年，進入資訊爆炸的時代，Google大神開始顯神威，在網路上發現同好的時候，他才漸漸接受自己。394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuf0u5f3dqS
394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGHmPBbYir7
「只是接受了自己，不代表別人肯接受這樣的我。」394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpx9finDwcJ
394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPlj0vnweJ7
所以他還是持續隱瞞這件事，也許是過於刻意隱瞞，在戀愛的過程中，他反而像個大男人，所交到的女朋友，也都是小女人類型的，這讓他更不可能坦白自己了。394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgMSMN6Bue4
394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOWCddFibGS
那天晚上，我幾乎聽完了他到目前為止的人生。394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKuF8iimmR7
394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNFaGbxaXLP
「壓抑」，若要下個結論，就只有這兩個字。394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsEeozBJd6u
394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTJRSY23qed
394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdVL89lndua
「為什麼告訴我？」
不過是朋友的朋友，一群朋友一起出去過幾次，我真的不認為我們有那麼熟。394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrek79JMooE
394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCaI559rucV
「我信任妳。」394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuXEFpsXGah
394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7VjxAqU9u3
「噗，你也太容易相信別人了吧，萬一我是大嘴巴咧。」394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQeJOdDGhSl
394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE2Db7MdSNs
「妳應該不是。」394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNlrfgBNPs8
394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgkcD6WMQiW
「這麼有信心？」394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡigVyOXQwl1
394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8bYAdwH31D
「有一次去唱歌，那個誰不是在說某個人的八卦嗎，說她和哪個歌手有一腿，還墮胎怎麼的。」394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNeGj550xZU
394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6dEnlcGXVl
「嗯？」394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJkMTkdC0lL
394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjZfLfLcJse
「妳本來在跟大家聊天，聊到這個就自己喝起酒來，也不搭話。我記得那個當事者跟妳有過節。」394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrFlRHyclOY
394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeDg6VVUVFV
「是有一些無聊的過節，你怎麼會知道？」394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ54n4lpXlZK
394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwgdhotFY5S
「因為別人是大嘴巴。可是妳當時什麼都沒說，也不參與話題，所以我信妳。」394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfE6J1ZQ8P7
394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiJtXgMC14n
竟然被偷偷觀察了啊。394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHB2zgM6iiZ
394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMS5MQtoBTx
「說不定我只是口渴了想喝酒啊。」394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhXHw3LlS33
394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡY9lOQWDB60
「妳是大嘴巴嗎？」394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCpvBTgU1so
394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKALwh7ricr
「我不是，但你的故事可能會成為我的創作題材。」394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvAZmIuEPYU
394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡd2I2SvidDs
「哈哈哈。」394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyh4gUMcexA
394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPB5T5siq6l
「哈哈。」394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8iDlKA67sn
394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQpFqb6n2uB
394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPN2sbgfoPw
394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡObmjlKprIe
他捧著高跟鞋，或許是我的錯覺，他的手彷彿在微微的顫抖。394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCDcz7KF2XS
394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWQJH2ArndD
我看著他小心翼翼的，將自己的臉側過，慢慢的貼在鞋頭的鞋面上，一秒，兩秒，三秒，然後離開它，看了看鞋，抬頭，盯著我。394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfdJctrTrUr
394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXO6mCn48zN
他放下高跟鞋，頭低著，對我伸出手。394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqv87AVyiIb
394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡI3mt2DTrou
我有點緊張，所以動作也很遲鈍。394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlddYZCuZwK
394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡccNiTt135Q
把右腳放進他手裡的時候，我意識到自己的雙手緊捏著床沿。394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZb19KNsl3w
394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5o3PZHil7O
他微微抬頭，眼神落在我的腳背上。394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpbCxg4sL4Q
394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGtlGnGqFeu
就像電影裡演的紳士，在女士的手背親吻那樣，他也這麼做了，只是把手換成腳。394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGq07YNKnH2
394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHE3ZRks53e
他輕輕地吻了我的腳背，就一下子，沒有停留，沒有聲響，我也沒有感到不舒服。394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTW5SiGrzTI
394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHRvttR79aQ
他拿起高跟鞋，從我的腳尖套上，再合上腳跟，確認高跟鞋穿好後，放下我的右腳。394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2ftn73sBzp
394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡibAsix7SJA
接著，換左腳。394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPJbCJLFwqF
394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1fuJ1rgfnM
因為他的動作一直很溫柔，所以我的緊張感消失了大半。394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxgGIbcAL6y
394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaF2yesMLfp
同樣的模式（或儀式）結束後，我的雙腳都穿上了高跟鞋，而他恢復了原本的姿勢，低著頭，跪著。394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg3EUv3SvQw
394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIJFXNj6O0Z
「頭抬起來。」我說。394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhviYEfnOA4
394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ060L1WnxB9
命令的語氣。394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡye4jvoE3wt
394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq6rZ07Ys9y
394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ58Or1qjvjb
394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpoq77L54zU
待續。394Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡU3gzzAltbG
