Kat648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHhmxtgLXSj
648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe79OiLt5cW
January 1, 2005
*
Same day
*
648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRUkucsHNGk
"That's... not... I wasn't..." I try to explain, but now that the lust haze is gone, I am unable to rationalize my actions. 648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBOPLCqcKrg
Was that what I was doing? I wanted to stop thinking about everything and I figured with what I heard about Ben, he wouldn't complain. 648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsYTZ34tGUK
"Ugh... I'm such an idiot." I cover my face with my hands. I just want to get out of here. Laying next to him in my underwear after being rejected is so embarrassing. I need to leave.648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLwzY1spCeb
He pulls my hands away from my face. His eyes meeting mine. "No, you aren't. You are just hurting."648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡldwzugEmvc
Is that it?648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE77ZMIjXDR
When I caught him with that whore, I was almost relieved. Maybe I'm just not processing my emotions properly... 648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr1Cl7kG1i2
I should be devastated. I mean, I am really upset, but I feel more like I'm mourning the life I lost, not the person. 648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoIwnE0DRqD
I think he wanted to get caught. He probably hoped I would join in or something.648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡql0bfbf7wK
What a creep. How could I give so much to him? I cannot let myself get wrapped up in another man like that again. 648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaFou7WwIqE
I need to be strong. 648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLn8750RDe3
648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT8C1jcGHLM
I need to be independent. 648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeR2d3buwZw
648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡphMbN9QgvQ
I need to make better choices. 648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlahpeoEG9V
I need to... not be here. Crap.648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡI6b1qlEWGt
Ben makes me feel weak and vulnerable.648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTYtkry95hL
But also powerful and wanted. 648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr2zRTeKql6
Ugh... I am so confused. 648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEITBnwPSVR
I do know that hopping from one guy literally onto another is not a good choice.648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxWn67qUvrH
I also know that nothing casual can happen with my best friend's boyfriend's best friend. That would be all kinds of complicated. 648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlxLbnIbkA3
Hopefully I haven't made things too awkward. Oh god, what if they get married? I will have to see him all the time. I will be reminded of this night forever.648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGM0Bmhb3m2
He smirks, tucking my hair behind my ear. "There she is, the wheels are turning again." 648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWjP59r74m8
I can't help the laugh that bubbles up. I probably sound insane, but this night is all sorts of messed up. 648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNkydY4havy
His face lights up and his dimples emerge. Crap. His smile turns my insides to jelly.648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbNnaFiydDK
"Come on, Katarina, give the poor little hamster a break. Tell me your thoughts." He gives me a reassuring smile. I'm not sure I like him using my full name, it makes my heart flutter.648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ70JIJCMREX
"I think..." I need a light topic. I just want to ignore my problems. "I think this has been the weirdest night."648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ47Pzg5MYqq
He nods in agreement. "Weird good or weird bad?"648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiwo85szNDy
"Hah... Both?" I wince, knowing he's going to prod for more and I don't want to go any deeper.648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIkcv8VwNmP
"I am going to have to agree with you." I was not expecting him to agree. "Although, I think yours had a bit more bad than mine." His hand caresses my cheek and I can't help but lean into his touch. 648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUe4xxK6jNz
I am so weak. 648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg4ZdhaZAF5
"Hmm..." His touch is relaxing and I feel the day catching up with me. The emotions and tears taking their toll on my body. 648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgjQbZriBUR
"You falling asleep on me, Kitty Kat?" I can hear the smile in his voice, but I'm having trouble keeping my eyes open.648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡj7TZgpBy1f
"I am not a cat." I say, as sternly as I can muster, but it comes out weak. 648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuiBye41dtt
"Meow." He chuckles at his own joke.648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg569AaUoAo
"You are so not funny." I mumble.648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsqFyqhYqM9
"Oh come on. You're no fun." He tries to tease me, but he doesn't realize just how accurate he is. 648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUHYWQaNwXJ
Maybe if I were more fun, things would be different. 648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYlDGGW83DK
"If only you knew..." I snuggle into his hard chest, hoping he won't ask anymore questions. 648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7E8gBd1QNP
I know I should leave, but I just can't bring myself to part with him. I'm sure he's filling some void and I'm being pathetic, but he hasn't thrown me out yet.648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHk8ytlGb99
In fact, he pulls me tighter. Resting his face in my hair. 648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLgC8CvcUG1
"Don't worry, I will protect you." He whispers and as I drift off into oblivion, I actually believe him. 648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡShEtxdHfYK
I awake to the sounds of muffled shouting. There is a heated argument somewhere nearby. 648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7P2aCxtOKE
When I try to move, I bump something hard with my elbow and freeze. I hear a groan and feel the bed move slightly. I am not alone.648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9UwDm958zD
Oh no. 648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPhidfMri4e
What did I do? 648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD8oeUuz8NW
Scanning the room, I realize I have no idea where I am or who could be behind me.648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡos3cJPTXlT
Unless Vanessa is having a really rough morning, that was definitely too deep to be her voice.648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX2d6mYQsbF
Crap. I am too afraid to look, who could it be? Bits and pieces from the night come to me, but not enough to piece together anything solid.648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNt4PnvdFa8
I remember crying at some point.648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMOOrY5bq49
648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡja0LKUzyAO
I remember drinking more than I should have.648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFxtTYhYN0X
648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ288iJKS2ON
I remember Vanessa being her usual self. 648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRA0nr92Y31
648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhKzYjKpSPk
I remember her new boy toy stuck to her side. 648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFoOEIUFKyZ
648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT99LBNzMZ3
And I remember... Uh oh. 648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsF20dy8WYy
It couldn't be... I wouldn't... Would I?648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7ZouRV68sE
Am I really asking myself this after waking up next to some random guy? Well, maybe not so random...648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGs5RrFS4fE
Oh god, this is all sorts of complicated. 648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡddHeA4w6uz
Okay, I just have to know... I try to roll over gently, without disturbing him. 648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHC7017JJAR
I find a pair of amused green eyes staring back at me. A gorgeous grin with dimples on his stupid perfect face. 648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGN3HNBlxnQ
Crap. 648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYltpKnA7vn
I know I'm blushing hard, I can literally feel my face burning. 648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeL6D8yGXRt
How did this happen?648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVPPJV5CFrl
"You done freaking out yet?" He asks with a chuckle. 648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWZAg25yzbD
Is he... laughing at me? 648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8NEJuXbGnp
"Uh..." And just like that, he has short circuited the connection between my brain and mouth. 648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡU0Sr9UGcCx
"Don't panic." He talks softly, like I am some wild animal that might bite him.648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5eAECGV4UW
I am totally panicking. I just can't decide if I want to run out of the room or stay and figure out what exactly happened. 648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQ9ZhEGkk8h
My curiosity wins, just barely. 648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhCylVdhNaQ
"Nothing happened." I must look really confused, because he feels the need to explain further. "We didn't have sex."648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUb8T9pY4IZ
"Oh..." I'm not sure if I should be relieved or hurt that he was naked laying next to me.648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpLJ3cuSxFg
Nope. Not letting my mind go there.648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvIeLtXlBAR
I choose to feel relief. I wouldn't have remembered it anyway. 648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9tDUpOEXRp
"Not for lack of you trying, of course." He flashes a cocky smirk at me. 648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCBWV5Bu2YM
I feel a frown tugging at the corners of my mouth, despite my attempt to keep my face neutral. No, I didn't throw myself at him, did I? 648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDLAv8v2qGu
I vaguely remember waking up and thinking I heard my name through the wall and then... 648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3vY4L4o8bL
"No way... I... Oh god!" My eyes pop open so wide, they begin to hurt.648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFoGcsx12TH
Crap. Did I really climb on top of him? Yep, I was totally grinding on him.648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNrblvI8QC1
I gasp, my gaze running down his body before I can stop myself. I take in his muscles, but his bottom half is covered in a sheet. 648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1lCmDoqvBZ
His eyes meet mine. "Reminiscing?" 648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7mFDpQYmun
"What! No!" My voice is too high and rushed to be convincing. 648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvG9vQpwoEz
I remember licking his defined chest.648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡy3i9cFBtLU
648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtf2B8xPkVq
I remember... 648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGlMcD8jnVO
he was naked!648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfltiNQ1Xms
I inwardly groan. I totally touched him. I know how big he is and... 648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh9MhXty5HA
Oh god! I know how he tastes. 648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkozeKk0QiE
"Shit." I know it's inelegant, but I can't think of anything else to say.648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEjNgYzVuN7
His mouth pops open as his face twists in shock. "Did you just... I can't believe you just said shit!" 648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZDsdlCmBCH
"What? Why not?" I sit up, feeling defensive. 648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyPKUEhh0xH
Why is he so shocked? He barely knows me. Why does he assume this? Did I say something weird last night?648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgfzYHPOErS
"You seemed kinda offended when I cussed, so I guess I just assumed..." He looks shy, almost like he was caught doing something wrong.648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmzSUfegMTp
"Based on?" Sure, I don't make a habit of using curse words, but it's more an ingrained reflex than an actual choice. 648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3Tk2z1vvfy
He hesitates, like he's afraid to say and I begin to feel slightly nervous. Crap, what did I say?648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZREByMyvLm
"You... uh... kinda flinched." He blushes and looks around the room. Insecure Ben is totally adorable. 648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfWULw8n0D9
"Oh." I'm honestly not sure how to respond because I definitely can't tell him the truth. "Well, I wasn't offended."648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTjRMyGAdjQ
"Okay." He blows out a breath, looking up at the ceiling. "If you say so." 648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2xsM2Ju2cA
He looks completely unconvinced but I can't give him more than that. 648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3gQZyExUNb
"So." He clears his throat. "Not to be totally awkward here..." His gaze drops to the tent of his crotch before his eyes scan the floor. 648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXUjg79zSBy
"And not that I would mind laying in bed with you all day." He looks down my body and winks. "But, maybe we should get dressed?"648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyHNltHsl70
I look down at myself, just now realizing I'm sitting here in lacy underwear. 648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoSqjsjWdHE
When I don't respond, Ben flashes his smile. "Or not, I mean you look great." 648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwqFnSvXHTz
I am unable to hide the look of shock on my face before I snatch the sheet to cover myself. 648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsQKq8EMu9g
Which is no longer covering "Little Ben", if you can even call it that.648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwgv5TBn5tu
Oops.648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEDCgTIAQP8
Of course that would happen to me! I take a moment to look at it in the daylight and wow, it's like a sculpture. 648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJtDPtG6vOk
Unable to stop myself, I have apparently lost my filter completely around this man. 648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡs58jSNDpuz
"Well hello, Big Ben." I try not to giggle like an immature school girl, but Ben's laugh makes me laugh harder. 648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJtMp49iIRS
"Big Ben, huh?" He grins, making my stomach flutter. He shakes his head, amused. "What am I going to do with you?"648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRoMIZC7RLB
My mouth goes dry as my mind conjures up all kinds of things he could do to me. It feels like all the air was sucked out of the room as I struggle to control my breathing. Is it hot in here, or is it just me?648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBX9I2mPlf7
My gaze returns to "Big Ben", as it seems to grow, straining to reach me. 648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4o4OtWs4EQ
Prying my eyes away, I meet his green gaze. He's no longer grinning or teasing, in fact, it looks like he's in pain. 648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡO3cDevP6Pk
"So, you like what you see?" His eyes never leaving mine. I try to close my mouth and steady my breathing. I need to keep my composure, but my head nods without my approval. 648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNczwQKcuB0
I lick my lips, remembering last night. I can't get my mouth to form words.648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvyHCMvJRvu
"Because I wouldn't mind seeing a little more." He reaches forward, tugging down the sheet. 648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeR8x2cTsLg
He sucks in a breath. "Fuck, Kat."648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9aTwQIDIAR
I close my eyes, my insides turning to liquid fire. I love his cussing, like he can't control himself. Maybe it's because of my background and it makes him seem like such a bad boy, but it turns me on, like crazy.648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxnYYeS6H48
He caresses my breasts through the sheer fabric. "God damn, you are beautiful." 648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2OANCmwXA1
I absorb his words as another wave of lust hits me. I know this is a bad idea. I know we should not be doing this, but I'm not sure I could stop it, even if I wanted to. 648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9U2xHbrZfp
His hands move down my body as his mouth meets mine. His kiss is hungry and desperate and I can't get enough. 648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCqmsOz1CrY
His hand grazes me where I'm aching and I nearly explode. I need him. Now. 648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyDJDJnW7Dg
"Do you have a condom?" He has to have one in here somewhere, right?648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvNEzIey2x1
He blushes and looks slightly uncomfortable. "Actually..." We both freeze as the sound of yelling grows closer. 648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqFJNnpBXky
I pull the sheet up to cover myself just as the door bursts open. All I see Vanessa's fiery hair flying around as she takes the scene before her. "What the fucking fuck is fucking going on in here?" 648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqySWRfvm1e
I know her well enough to know when she can't think, she drops f-bombs. Her gaze drops to Ben's crotch, before he grabs a corner of the sheet to cover himself. 648Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnOqCI1OJ7k
I can't help the laughter that bursts out of me at the sight of her craziness. "Calm yourself, Vanessa."
ns18.117.114.211da2
