[bgm music to read to]
644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiyyzeTU4We
"I don't remember myself being this pathetic before...644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1z815QyP26
I have no motivation left to try, I don't have any patience left in me...644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfmq5Ixlhrj
I feel like I'm becoming more and more useless each day.644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiCzWwVlc3P
And I know that i don't even try, but I get so anxious when I think about exams..."644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOWLt0CG07I
644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡk18TcHAEsp
"I'm scared of being left behind... forever."644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoUbvvF1MLE
644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUxytaoSB42
"I'm scared that I might give up on myself."
Have I already given up on myself?
"It's rough, it's lonely... and I don't see a way out."
"Time waits for no one."
"I don't have the willpower to change, and I'm a master at justifying myself." 644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqEnwi8b6G3
644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSeCREDVi8J
But...644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡThDNMXOydl
644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaI36xhYKUK
"We all have our ups and downs. We're human. It's incredibly hard to be consistent, since we're not machines (ISTJs go brrrr though). As long as we think, we'll keep on making excuses for ourselves... and that's normal. Everyone does it. 644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaL68LUKWuA
At the end of the day, you're worrying and thinking about your own future. 644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBE0Zwew0re
A person who thinks about changes, and is willing to change...644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2ccZZ0wTv5
Is absolutely not pathetic.644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1jlh8adYMb
You're not garbage."644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyr3DTegETB
644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5lBH8Prfln
"Being strong enough to get up and fight every day is a special talent. You never know, there might be someone very close to you doing it... just for you."
I know I don't work very hard, but I hate being told that more than almost everything. I hate it when my parents remind me that I've done nothing. I hate it when they tell me to do work. Stupid, isn't it?
I once told my parents that I would continue to feel inferior, worthless and unsuccessful if I don't make a decent salary in a few years. You know what they said?644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAv3z7eJ5UH
"It's okay. You don't need to make money. You can live under our our roof forever."644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkQiOn4GDuz
644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRwZDOTHhxb
I don't want that though. Despite everything, I want to live by my own efforts. I'm a mess, yet I don't want anyone's help. I mean, I can ask for help when I need it, but...644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡabnhXKJu0A
644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡY0qX1omNna
Sorry, mum. Nothing's working out for you huh?644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAlq410qcLA
You wasted all your money on all the sports, instruments, tutoring lessons on your son. 644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZioyHQfQbC
Your son didn’t meet all your expectations.644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlvMl5roPHD
Your son doesn't want to get married.644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp7O1R5pMjt
Your son might just end up a broke loser on the street.644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuOesqtIptH
644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGeSYUTkHuz
You know, you paid thousands of dollars for my overnight contact lenses, only for me to be too lazy to wear it.644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhFtb83gGo8
You paid another thousand for me to do that Duke of Edinburgh challenge, though I never submitted my report and ended up never getting the certification. I still never told you... to this day.
Sorry, dad. 644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlli9VfP9FS
I know I said I'd pay you back for everything you've given to me, but I don't know if I can.
I might just be the worthless child you tried so hard to prevent me being.
Hahaha.
I'm sorry, I'm just a coward, so I just want to run away. Take the easy way out.644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWZSGXqjWCm
I'm scared of failing, so.
644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVaLLaPQdPz
But today, too, I'm still alive. So even though I've accomplished nothing, even when it looks like there's no escape, I'll keep going. I have to keep going. I'll finish my degree. If I get a full-time job, so be it. If I don't, then that's fine. I might regret it. But at the end of the day, I'm alive. No matter how afraid I am for tomorrow, I'll have to face it. The main thing keeping me unhappy... is me.
Thanks for loving me. I'm sorry I can't love you back as of now, or maybe for a long time to come. But maybe one day, I will.644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvE9wVqU6EU
644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5k8Q2wMdFw
Sincerely,644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdgklWsAmcj
Your son Charlie.644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP8evFiJsEh
644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLkopCBa42n
P.S. Screw you sis /j.644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTDCCL3kLdb
644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQbVBgIFns7
[I remembered the existence of this song midway through writing this]644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIv0hmllRt1
... And on a whim, I sent a voice message containing all of this to my parents (it's 3am right now, but my parents are on vacation elsewhere). Saying it out loud is really something, huh.644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlJP22If6RP
644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡR9eAmRes1L
My mother just sent me back a hug emoji and "goodnight" as it was the last word of my voice message as well. Not going to lie, I think that's the best thing she's ever said or texted. I wonder if she'll write a long paragraph or send a long voice message back later.
