我依家一直都諗住Zoey,尤其是被班長噉挑動底下,我收工嘅時候諗,返到屋企嘅時候都諗,就連喺沖涼嘅時候,沖下沖下,就不知不覺邊諗佢邊自摸。射出嚟之後,就開始諗啲冇噉膚淺嘅事情。我一直疑惑佢嘅家庭出身底下,點樣可以栽培到佢呢種性格。Zoey係個好好嘅人,我可以羅列一堆優點出嚟。但令我不解嘅係,佢嘅家長,老竇同老母,都唔係啲乜嘢好好嘅人。我仲好記得喺家長日嘅時候,我向佢父母解釋DSE啲嘢嘅時候,佢老竇無啦啦兜巴星咗一巴畀佢個女。正當我驚訝得合唔上嘴嘅時候,佢老母一輪嘴噉大聲閙個女,佢嘅口臭傳染都我度,大聲到連隔離班嘅老師都走嚟問需唔需要幫手。我心諗冇乜理由因為成績而對個女大打出手,尤其是喺Zoey嗰個學期成績有進步嘅情況下,分數都算體面。但佢父母講嘢語無論次,我唔太明白佢哋個邏輯,一時話個女成績差,但我同佢哋佢今次個成績唔算差,佢哋就改口話運動比賽哂大量時間。但我提醒佢Zoey今年已經冇玩校隊,最多就係陸運會會上場噉解。佢哋就轉講第啲嘢,總係有嘢鬧個女,直到最雞毛蒜皮嘅事情都講哂出嚟,先肯罷休。
42Please respect copyright.PENANA0xAfobTGiG
我一直以為父母嘅教養同子女嘅性格息息相關,今次我見到反例。之於我自己,係唔係都喺⋯⋯媽媽嘅影響下,塑造我嘅性格,我唔知道。但我忽然諗起呢件事:
42Please respect copyright.PENANAuYz7FH26b1
多年前嘅嗰一日,我返到屋企,打開屋企門之前,我見到門口擺咗對皮鞋。入到屋企,聽到入面有人聲。我好驚,因為屋企應該冇人喺度嘅。但我仔細噉聽,發現聲音係喺房入面傳嚟,而門係鎖住嘅。正當我唔明白發生乜嘢事嘅時候,我隻耳貼住棟門,偷聽究竟係邊個。
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「Tiffany啊,你副偈真係好正,畀我索下你畀黑絲包住嘅雙腳。」
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「你咁鐘意我對腳咩?」
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「冇錯⋯⋯啊——你對腳,嚟,用對腳嚟磨我條Jer。」
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「啊——」
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雖然我唔應該聽呢番說話,但我第一反應係搵咗條房嘅門匙出嚟,偷偷打開房門。我靜靜雞噉打開一道罅,足夠我偷睇入面嘅情況。我見到佢着住一身空姐嘅服裝,用着住黑絲對雙腳,幫一位全祼嘅男人打飛機。
我知道我唔應該睇,但係我對眼冇離開佢哋。而我條下面,亦不自覺噉硬起嚟。
42Please respect copyright.PENANAeWkqpn8vaA
呢一刻,我感受到官能嘅愉悅,伴隨偷窺嘅羞恥感,呢兩樣感覺都帶嚟性興奮。我忍唔住將手放喺褲入面,稍為摸兩摸,同時擔心佢哋會發現。
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「啊,你對淫腳真係好撚正。」
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「你條Jer好硬,我夾得好舒服。」
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「繼續!啊——繼續!」
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我見佢對腳熟練得就好似雙手噉樣,喺磨擦條陽具時,仲不時用腳尖撫摸龜頭,又識得用腳指按壓陰莖周圍,就好似按摩噉。
42Please respect copyright.PENANAqjJ94N8tLl
唔使幾耐,嗰位男士嘅陰莖隨住一陣抽畜,就吐出白精液出嚟,射向黑絲襪度。
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「噉快就⋯⋯」雖然佢極細聲噉講,但偏偏畀嗰位男人聽到。
42Please respect copyright.PENANAty2Ku5m5HE
「你講乜嘢?你個賤女人?」
42Please respect copyright.PENANA4mFNNPZ4ui
嗰男人掌摑咗佢一巴。
42Please respect copyright.PENANAigG1D4DUbP
嗰一巴好響,響到就好似喺我塊面度摑嘅噉。
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同時我條陰莖硬到已經頂住條校褲,就好似畀蟻咬噉,已經被性欲刺激得全身難受。
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「我⋯⋯算,畀多五百你。」
42Please respect copyright.PENANAEkiFLWpSB3
我拿拿臨離開我屋企,但同時細細聲鎖起門離開,唔畀佢哋發現。我出到去,跑啊跑,唔知要去邊。跑下跑下,我開始停止思考,任由身體主宰我嘅精神。當我回復思考時,我已經喺殘廁入面,呢度乾淨,闊落。我即刻除低條褲,本能噉將隻手放喺下體度,捽下捽下。而個腦全部都諗緊頭先偷窺到嘅嘢。我特別留意套上黑絲嘅一對修長嘅腳,同埋嗰套正正式式嘅空姐制服。我邊諗住呢啲嘢,邊自慰,就好似我對手係佢對腳噉。當我合埋眼,我感覺佢就喺度幫我打飛機。
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直到我射精。
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但將一切都吐出嚟後,一切性欲化作空洞,然後,內心就畀罪惡感所纏繞,乃至我亟力想將射出嚟嘅精,放返春袋度。但我做唔到,我眼都唔眨噉望住地上灘精,專注到連呼吸都唔記得。
42Please respect copyright.PENANACB7SrKIEuC
出嚟之後,我見到每個人都望住我,佢哋我似有嘢同我講。我加快腳步,遠離殘廁。但到另一個地方,仍然見到其他三唔識七嘅人望住我,就好似見到犯人噉。有啲人講我個名,我唔係真係聽得好好清楚,但我聽到有啲音節,同我個名差唔多。而我唔識佢哋,我唔知道佢哋點知我個名,佢哋點解要講我,佢哋點解要望住我,佢哋點解要指住我,佢哋點解不斷提起我,佢哋點解不斷望住我,佢哋不斷指住我,佢哋點解要講我,佢哋點解要望住我,佢哋點解要指住我,佢哋點解不斷提起我,佢哋點解不斷望住我,佢哋不斷指住我,望住我,護我,笑我,我唔識佢哋,我唔識佢哋,我唔識佢哋,我唔識佢哋,我唔識佢哋,我唔識佢哋,收聲⋯⋯我想叫佢哋收聲⋯⋯收聲!收聲收聲收聲收聲收聲收聲收聲收聲收聲收聲收聲收聲收聲收聲收聲收聲收聲收聲收聲收聲收聲收聲收聲收聲收聲收聲收聲收聲收聲收聲收聲收聲收聲收聲收聲收聲收——
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當我回復理智時,已經坐咗喺麥當勞度,買咗杯新地食。我一坐就坐到藍天褪色成淡紅,先至返屋企。我一入到門口,就見到媽媽。
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「今日我哋出街食飯吖!我今日返part time賺咗啲錢。」媽媽話。
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「哦。」我細聲答。
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佢依家着緊嘅係日常便裝,化咗淡妝。佢對眼望住我,而我迴避佢嘅眼神。
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「做乜嘢個樣噉唔開心嘅?係唔係有心事?」佢話,「細佬,唔好睇電視啦,要搵下書。我哋一陣要出去食飯啦。」
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我呆望佢面頰,呢塊面好似仲係新淨噉,冇畀任何嘢糟則過。而佢對腳,冇着絲襪,好似從來都只係用嚟行路同企,別無他用。
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「做乜嘢啊?」佢笑住講,搭我膊頭,「係唔係有唔開心嘅事?講出嚟聽聽?」
42Please respect copyright.PENANA7IP0WDsCA5
我仲可以講啲乜嘢?同佢講我見到佢哋喺床上嘅一切?同佢講我唔單止睇到,睇到你着住平時工作嘅空姐衫,用對腳去幫男人洩欲。我仲要同你講⋯⋯仲要⋯⋯
諗住你嚟打飛機?42Please respect copyright.PENANAs1RTDTdWQm
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回憶到此為止。
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雖然曾經嘅感受係幾咁強烈,但以人類記憶力短暫嘅好處嚟講,時間足以洗刷所有不堪同埋屈辱。依家我諗返呢段回憶,仲可以記得啲乜嘢?呢段回憶就好似即將燒成灰燼嘅日記,我就快唔可以從回憶中搵返絲毫細節。好快,我甚至會唔記得佢曾經同嗰啲男人做過,更加唔會記得我對呢啲事情亂倫般嘅着迷。
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難堪嘅唔去諗,去諗痛快事情。42Please respect copyright.PENANApXAMP8Frf5