->>>你是風兒我是沙,我想和你一起賞花賞草,看星星看月亮,從詩詞歌賦聊到人生哲學,然後就嘿嘿嘿……紫髮小魔星曰:雞泥上司,小兔哥不是「瘋鵝」,不過尼確實蠻「傻」的~
【凌家動物園 I 花心豹吃兔計畫】小兔不吃回頭草
By 喵芭渴死姬
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6. 看花看草,從詩詞歌賦聊到人生哲學……
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這段日子來的不斷挫敗,讓付墨痛定思痛,他千想萬想,沈思良久,發現一些可疑的現象,比如:每每在公司稍有接近之意,小兔子總會刻意避開;下班時,小兔又經常匆匆離開;週末打電話過去時,家裡似乎總有各種事在忙。905Please respect copyright.PENANAL4DZJ7TsKC
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最後,他終於做出一個結論—一定是小兔子臉皮太薄了!不然他明明已經表現得這麼明顯了,小兔怎麼會還一直不敢接近他呢?肯定是這樣的!905Please respect copyright.PENANAv1bDLbWG0a
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啊!害羞的小兔子,真可愛~905Please respect copyright.PENANAbQS4JnyGO3
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於是,他擦了擦想像中的口水,決定來個週六一日員工旅遊,然後找機會支開其他人,與小兔單獨賞景談心、培養情調,順便一展自己對於山水花草的淵博學問,絕對迷倒兔生啦!905Please respect copyright.PENANANMoK5Z7Avs
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命令一下,全員高聲歡呼,小兔則淚眼汪汪了,看得付墨得意心想,小兔竟然感動成這樣嗎?哥果然英明睿智啊!905Please respect copyright.PENANAqSYSOj6NNT
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嗚~我的週末睡到自然醒沒了……905Please respect copyright.PENANAfCz9oa7Huo
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絕望地在行事曆打上「員工旅遊」四字,凌小兔於內心如泣如訴道。905Please respect copyright.PENANAtMV6dxZtVR
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禮拜六一大早,付墨提前開車到凌家埋伏,打算來個「剛好經過就順道來載,所以沒事先打電話通知,事實上是特別繞過來的,看我多體貼!」這種各大言情小說連續劇都常出現的老梗。905Please respect copyright.PENANADbfrdXAKFW
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從小兔的打卡表來看,就不難推算出這兔子肯定常睡過頭,才會都剛好時間點匆忙踩點,於是,他事先查好小兔家到公司的各種交通方式中,以公車A的站牌離家最近,由此可知,小兔出門後應會立刻往右轉去,他便將車停在門口右側。905Please respect copyright.PENANA0HWbA4ClaY
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細心地梳妝打扮好後,他下了車,以最從容帥酷的姿勢靠在車門旁等著,待小兔家的門一打開,便立刻熟練地擺出優雅的淡笑,準備迎接小兔子既訝異又驚喜的感動表情……905Please respect copyright.PENANArBlBO8Mnnp
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「糟了!糟了!快遲了……」頭上還翹著呆毛的小兔子,一出門就匆匆忙忙地轉左飛奔而去。905Please respect copyright.PENANAbojNM1ofWF
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「……」905Please respect copyright.PENANAwUwGUIdxaO
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事情又一次出乎預料地發展,付墨傻眼地呆了五分鐘後,才考慮著是否要追上去,但又覺得那樣實在太損形象,便只好決定放棄。905Please respect copyright.PENANADnQkTM3v3N
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靠!這是怎麼回事?我的推算竟然會出錯?!905Please respect copyright.PENANAlVEYqvXqjB
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心中碎碎唸地轉身回到車上,卻赫然發現一個人正在副駕駛坐上對他賊笑,他不禁錯愕地指著眼前的紫毛小子問:「你、你怎麼在這?」905Please respect copyright.PENANAHEfe7uDoyV
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「嘿嘿~」貝兒從背包裡拿出一包牛肉乾,理所當然地啃了起來,「趁雞泥你發呆時溜進來的啊!」905Please respect copyright.PENANAPhNwNoY5Dc
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「……」沒想到會被人發現自己出糗的樣子,付墨撇了下嘴角,不悅地繼續問:「你上來幹嘛?」905Please respect copyright.PENANA3sFVhCQX1p
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貝兒眨了眨露出期待光芒的大眼說:「窩也要去玩~」905Please respect copyright.PENANAT5rdAkTMPr
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「欸,雞泥你是不是覺得覺得很奇怪,為捨摸小兔哥要朝那邊跑啊?」見對方沈著一張黑臉,貝兒只好收起調皮的笑容,擺出認真的表情,為很想知道答案卻死活不肯認輸的雞泥上司解釋……905Please respect copyright.PENANAUdRBHaf8Aq
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原來,公車A的站牌雖然離小兔家最近,但是車子來的班次較少,錯過一班就得等十來分鐘,另一側的公車B站牌雖然距離稍遠,但跑步的話也只是多個三分鐘路程,班次又較多,準時每五分鐘一班,所以小兔每次都是搭公車B去公司的。905Please respect copyright.PENANALCMSK4QwAe
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為了與紐約的朋友保持聯繫,貝兒的時差一直過得亂七八糟,今天依舊天未亮就起床上網刷Twitter,所以老早就在二樓觀望著,料到會發生這種事,一見小兔衝出門錯過付墨,他就立刻賊笑地抓起背包衝下樓,趁付墨還在發呆時,偷溜上車。905Please respect copyright.PENANAfDEqZNso97
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「……嘿嘿,這事我也是前幾天剛好聽到的,雞泥你看起來就呆呆的,不知道也很正常啦~」貝兒一臉同情地拍拍付墨的肩膀。905Please respect copyright.PENANACdAD3rciS4
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「……」付墨呆滯地聽完後,徹底無言了。905Please respect copyright.PENANAlMN1sWwiS4
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「好啦!快點快點!再不出發,小兔哥就要丟下你,跟大家出去玩嚕~」905Please respect copyright.PENANA5OQaTPq2Ca
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他們敢?!哼!算了,正好套套這小鬼的話!905Please respect copyright.PENANAl8Cmbt8wRP
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腹黑地啟動車子往公司開去,付墨思考了下著手點,不動聲色地開口問:「我記得你叫拉貝爾,是小兔的……?」905Please respect copyright.PENANAtRNXYIfHcg
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聞言,貝兒雙手捧著臉頰,故作嬌羞狀,「窩是小兔哥最親密的男能~」905Please respect copyright.PENANADKFn8eBz4K
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男人個頭!你個毛都沒長齊的小屁孩!905Please respect copyright.PENANA2XOnVNJH6r
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額上突地冒出幾個十字筋,付墨忍不住在心中吐槽,卻也不好意思再問,只好暗自猜測。905Please respect copyright.PENANAepmLITVo6i
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見對方沒反應,貝兒聳聳肩,繼續咬著牛肉乾反問:「那泥跟小兔哥又是什麼關係啊?為捨摸要一直接近他?」905Please respect copyright.PENANAgNNPIKMAzu
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要你管?!老子才是小兔子最親密的男人啦!905Please respect copyright.PENANAwXct514vsR
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「咳!」付墨依舊保持淡定貌,「上司關心員工很正常。」905Please respect copyright.PENANAAXlr9MXxAR
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「喔~原來不是要追小兔哥嗎?」貝兒狀似了然地點點頭,眼裡透露著賊笑,「好的,窩會幫你跟小兔哥說清楚,讓他不要誤會。」905Please respect copyright.PENANAGeAFGMW7yk
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泥馬的!就是要他誤會啊!說清楚個屁?!!905Please respect copyright.PENANASFCuvfnrok
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暗自磨了下牙,付墨決定轉移話題,切入問題重心,「我看你還是高中生吧?沒跟父母一起住嗎?」905Please respect copyright.PENANAyqWFo2f3yV
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「我爹地媽咪都去世了,只有哥哥。」貝兒低頭啃牛肉乾。905Please respect copyright.PENANA4aHOzGLoSW
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沒料到這種答案,付墨頓時愣住,隨即感到有些內疚,「抱歉,不是故意提你傷心事。」905Please respect copyright.PENANAS3pvPzQWk9
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「迷關係,窩寬宏大量地原諒你~」貝兒燦笑心想,窩會用成語耶~真是學語言的天才!905Please respect copyright.PENANAHG7Cx9c2Ij
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「……」付墨深吸口氣,告訴自己不要跟小孩計較,「那你哥呢?」905Please respect copyright.PENANAQcSJQzRIfc
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想起好久不見的哥哥,貝兒就感到一陣失落,語氣也跟著落寞了下來,「他在很遙遠的地方工作。」905Please respect copyright.PENANAKW3kbtvioF
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聽他忽然可憐兮兮的樣子,付墨想了會,又問:「所以就把你寄養在小兔家嗎?」905Please respect copyright.PENANAdIXJk1tJCO
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「寄養?」貝兒眨眨眼,似乎沒聽懂這個詞。905Please respect copyright.PENANA04raXaKdoZ
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「……就是讓你待在小兔家,讓他幫忙照顧你。」心想還是別傷了這孤兒的自尊心,付墨斟酌詞語地解釋道。905Please respect copyright.PENANAGKnUO4SJBP
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「喔,對呀~」貝兒點點頭心想,哥哥確實是叫他暫時住在凌家,等他玩夠了,就來接他回紐約……啊!誰說我是來玩的啦?!我是真的要離家出走啦!!!哼哼哼!905Please respect copyright.PENANAoXTDZfZW2x
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沒察覺到貝兒忽又紅著臉氣嘟嘟的表情,付墨根據方才得知的資訊,再次開啟了腦補模式——905Please respect copyright.PENANAxwU0BKzciE
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無父無母的孤兒兄弟,為了過活,哥哥只好到外地打工,因為窮到連房子都沒有,所以托小兔家人幫養幼弟,而弟弟為了減輕家計負擔,只好下海當藝人半工半讀吧?905Please respect copyright.PENANAeakaWLkGFk
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算了,這小孩也挺可憐的,我就不跟他計較了,今天的費用由我來幫忙出吧,唉!哥真善良,小兔一定會非常感動的!905Please respect copyright.PENANAKNJQUXXjGT
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接下來的時間裡,付墨陷在腦補世界中無法自拔,不住地為自己的善心感動不已,一旁的貝兒見了,不禁困惑地心想,這雞泥幹嘛一臉要哭不哭的表情啊?905Please respect copyright.PENANAi9DkDpeagc
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到了公司的集合處後,兩人上了遊覽車,便聽見凌小兔的驚呼聲。905Please respect copyright.PENANAM13epHflxL
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「咦?貝兒怎麼也來了?」905Please respect copyright.PENANA1ZAMqsL6Yx
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還不等貝兒說話,付墨就搶先回答:「我邀請他的,上次香朵菈的廣告代言中,拉貝爾表現得十分出色,讓廠商非常滿意,所以我就請他跟大家一起同樂,表達感謝之意。」905Please respect copyright.PENANAzkrH4leeGH
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欸???怎麼昨天沒聽貝兒說過?小兔一頭霧水看向貝兒。905Please respect copyright.PENANAXqtJZe5FHz
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「嘿嘿!Surprise~」貝兒調皮地比了個Ya的手勢,一雙賊眼偷瞄了下付墨心想,算雞泥識相,不過,我還是不會放水讓你輕易吃小兔哥豆腐的!905Please respect copyright.PENANAjJnWQIt1cM
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嗯?那眼神?喔!一定是感激我的慷慨大方吧?小兔你看,哥多有親和力!付墨如是心想。905Please respect copyright.PENANASvOfIbEGXs
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???這兩人什麼時候熱絡起來的啊?小兔依舊滿臉問號地心想。905Please respect copyright.PENANAWSth6a6QKp
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「喔喔喔!未來的大明星啊!來來來,簽個名做紀念!」嗅到什麼風雨欲來的味道,李組長趕緊打哈哈地遞出馬克筆,一邊心想,等拉貝爾以後紅了,這簽名就能拿來賣錢了!905Please respect copyright.PENANAnypeT7KWGh
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「好喔~」貝兒接過筆,就在李組長的Polo衫上畫了個吐舌鬼臉。905Please respect copyright.PENANAcbk6oCf5N3
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「……」905Please respect copyright.PENANATjeIZCpuAs
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/(。ω。)\ /(>ω<)\ /(QωQ)\ /(=ω=)\ /(〝ω〞)\ /(。ω。)\ /(>ω<)\ 905Please respect copyright.PENANAA8imTDRXQE
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到了陽明山……905Please respect copyright.PENANAG5D5Nhag1R
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「大家各自分組活動啊,記得X點回來集合……」李組長看著手錶對大家叮嚀注意事項。905Please respect copyright.PENANAUaSp6oXY53
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「聽說你跟拉貝爾最熟,過來跟我們一起招待他吧。」 付墨趁機對小兔低聲說道,一邊在心中算計著,嗯哼,到時再叫李組長把拉貝爾帶開,就可以單獨跟小兔……嘿嘿嘿!905Please respect copyright.PENANAKuPW5HX6BR
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「啊?喔……」905Please respect copyright.PENANAZZ4OCgtyKF
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於是,四人一路悠晃到遊客較少的區域,付墨見時機甚佳,便對李組長打了個眼色,狗腿李隨即意會。905Please respect copyright.PENANA0iQtK8VJak
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「拉貝爾先生,聽說在那邊跟芒花拍照最好看,我來幫你拍幾張吧!」說完,李組長就拉著貝兒的手臂往另一邊走去。905Please respect copyright.PENANA5mHU1ZU1Xp
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幹得好!小李子!付墨於眼神中讚道。905Please respect copyright.PENANAA2XYKZSdtF
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大王過獎了!李組長於眼神中謝恩。905Please respect copyright.PENANADvQL2Acrx1
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「喔,好啊!」誰知貝兒也不是省油的燈,立刻就拉開嗓門大喊:「小兔哥~我們來一起拍照唷~~~」905Please respect copyright.PENANAWe03K8X8nD
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「喔,來了!」差點兔落魔王口的小兔,隨即就跑了過去。905Please respect copyright.PENANAgEOgwaNq5P
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付墨與李組長:「……」905Please respect copyright.PENANAqJHBbsrIdD
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在大王Boss的冷視線下,李組長冒著冷汗地替兩人拍了幾張後,貝兒又拿出手機跟小兔大玩自拍一番,拍完自己的手機還拿小兔的手機幫拍,等他好不容易玩夠了,已經半個小時過去了。905Please respect copyright.PENANAOOd6D0fNH5
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「小兔,我們……」心想乾脆自己找個藉口抓人走,可惜付墨才剛開口,就被人打斷。905Please respect copyright.PENANAhAUu5jXTKV
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「小兔哥,這裡好漂釀喔!來幫我拍~」905Please respect copyright.PENANAanf34Elhdo
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「好啊!」905Please respect copyright.PENANAtRHyfRISPw
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見自家大王黑漆漆的臉色,李組長趕緊自告奮勇地舉手:「我來我來……」905Please respect copyright.PENANAaWriFCQvUE
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「好啊~你幫我拿背包!」不假思索地把背包掛在李組長伸出的手臂上後,貝兒就歡快地拉著小兔跑走。905Please respect copyright.PENANAejji9JLK0X
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付墨與李組長:「……」905Please respect copyright.PENANAwXqvrKomKN
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好不容易等貝兒玩夠了,四人繼續往前走,經過一個賣美式炸熱狗的攤子,一陣肚叫聲頓時響遍天,付墨一聽,馬上對小兔投以溫柔的一笑,「肚子餓了嗎?我們去買……」905Please respect copyright.PENANABkFIvQpyji
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「呃……」豈知小兔卻是一臉尷尬地猶豫貌。905Please respect copyright.PENANAnXjYKRNfQe
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「好啊好啊,窩要疵~~~」貝兒兩眼發光地撲過來,雙手揉著的肚子傳出咕嚕咕嚕的聲音,「雞泥你請客嗎?窩餓扁扁了~」905Please respect copyright.PENANAqe7XV9EbLI
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怎麼又是你?!!!905Please respect copyright.PENANAvJdpIWsORp
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滿腔柔情瞬間凍結,付墨抽了抽嘴角在心裡說服自己,這孩子窮,會餓成這樣也很正常,便保持鎮定地笑說:「……當然。」905Please respect copyright.PENANAnWjuSvJHJU
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「耶!太好嚕,窩要吃二十根!」905Please respect copyright.PENANAOgUGSq0oum
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「……?!」聽到這數字,付墨與李組長頓時傻眼了,那包著玉米粉的熱狗那麼大一根,成年人吃個兩三根都嫌飽了,這小鬼居然要吃二十根?!905Please respect copyright.PENANAbKJsmAmUwt
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「對、對不起,貝兒食量大,我出就好了。」看出兩個上司錯愕的表情,小兔立刻就要自己掏腰包付錢。905Please respect copyright.PENANA0jrUYcs8cw
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「不,沒關係,小意思。」付墨趕緊攔下小兔的動作,臉上也恢復一貫的淡笑心想,也不過就二十根,哥又不是付不起,等下盡快找機會把小兔帶開,讓李組長自己去煩惱拉貝爾的餵食問題就好了!905Please respect copyright.PENANA8lwMi8GJwu
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然而,付墨很快就發現到,他把事情想得太簡單了……905Please respect copyright.PENANAJPSsDzLb0T
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三個小時後,付墨和李組長拿著第五趟的二十根熱狗回來,欲哭無淚。905Please respect copyright.PENANAq69vxRq56G
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「謝嚕~」貝兒開心地一一接過熱狗狂吃。905Please respect copyright.PENANALSGKbVsfVr
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「……」付墨與李組長無言地看著他比小兔還纖細單薄的身材,明明塞了近百根炸熱狗的肚子卻依舊平坦,絲毫沒有吃撐漲起的跡象,兩人不禁眼神死地心想,馬蛋這吃貨下肚的東西都去哪了?!!!905Please respect copyright.PENANAQH0oSimohz
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「呵呵……」幫忙遞熱狗餵貝兒的小兔,只能乾笑地無言以對。905Please respect copyright.PENANAtJLatd3VR5
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歡樂的時光很快就結束了,一行人乘遊覽車回到公司,終於玩鬧夠的貝兒忍不住呵欠連連,小兔也疲態盡顯,付墨見狀,便知表現的機會又到了。905Please respect copyright.PENANAomyXgvNX54
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「我送你們回去吧。」他二話不說,就搭著兩人的肩往停車處走去。905Please respect copyright.PENANA3l1gu2lCQ0
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又一次在眾目睽睽下被予以特殊待遇,臉皮薄的小兔立刻就尷尬地說:「咦咦?不用啦,我們可以坐公車。」905Please respect copyright.PENANALoOZfGlCCZ
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然而,付墨自有他難以抗拒的說法,「我們公司招待貴客要有始有終。」905Please respect copyright.PENANAg8fEoFmI1Y
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「好耶~」天不怕地不怕的貝兒,自是拍手贊同要看好戲。905Please respect copyright.PENANAxtOVqLz6kb
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「……」905Please respect copyright.PENANAaNMHe7sSiX
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於是乎,又一次被大王Boss丟下的眾人,不禁又淚流滿面地心想,怎麼以前都不見老大你親自招待誰啊?905Please respect copyright.PENANApNzraeDUoS
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當車子開到凌家門口後,轉頭發現兩人都睡著了,付墨看著副駕駛座上的小兔,白嫩嫩的可愛小臉實在是有夠吸引人,便忍不住想偷吃點小豆腐,他在心中算計著,如果一次沒親醒,就多親幾次直到他醒來,然後就說——905Please respect copyright.PENANA2Hh54zxcJr
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『我太喜歡你了,所以,才如此情・不・自・禁……』905Please respect copyright.PENANAdnaRueFL4X
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最好還要深情款款地捧著小兔羞紅的小臉,兩人在深情凝視中,再次慢慢地貼在一起,然後就……嘿嘿嘿!905Please respect copyright.PENANA2aaLeTeyQH
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多浪漫啊!!!905Please respect copyright.PENANA64qTIwj9rv
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「小兔子……」抹去想像中流出來的鼻血,付墨輕輕摸了摸小兔臉,慢慢地靠了過去,顯然忘了車上還有位未成年的少年在後座。905Please respect copyright.PENANABocUy4E64q
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然而,本來車一停就醒來的小兔,還沒來得及睜開眼,就感覺到在臉上游移的手,隨即就緊張了起來,不知所措地心想,怎麼辦怎麼辦怎麼辦?要醒來還是乾脆一直裝睡裝不知道?905Please respect copyright.PENANAshpRwI5xBi
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眼見小兔子一直沒有醒來的跡象,付墨暗自竊喜地越靠越近,就在溫熱的吐息灑在小兔臉上時,就忽被一顆紫毛頭從旁撞開。905Please respect copyright.PENANAwbiYF6HCJU
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「啊~~到家了耶~」貝兒突然從後座衝過來抱住小兔,臉上的笑容好不燦爛好不可愛,彷彿一點都不知道後腦杓撞到了什麼,「小兔哥醒一醒,我們肥家嚕~」905Please respect copyright.PENANAfSC6VZr3vT
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「到家啦?」聞言,小兔立刻睜開眼,雙手迅速地打開車門,「謝謝總經理,掰掰!」905Please respect copyright.PENANA5FCbSWSgPR
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「雞泥,掰掰~~」說完,貝兒就跟著趕緊下車,兩人頭也不回地往家門衝去。905Please respect copyright.PENANAdI8JnyA04t
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「……」付墨摀著嘴,痛得說不出話來,只能眼睜睜地看著到嘴的兔肉一蹦一蹦跳走,他瞪著那隻扮豬吃老虎的紫毛小魔頭,悲憤加交地在內心狂吼——905Please respect copyright.PENANAO6xBqXM0pk
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掰你個頭!!!!老子總有一天一定會收服你!!!
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/(。ω。)\ /(>ω<)\ /(QωQ)\ /(=ω=)\ /(〝ω〞)\ /(。ω。)\ /(>ω<)\
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後記:
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大魔王V.S.小魔頭正式對決—毫無懸念完敗!XDDD905Please respect copyright.PENANAv0XN4voIqw
905Please respect copyright.PENANAQfNpdAed0V
昨天突然看到西啡給貝貝取的新綽號——正音班特教生(噴905Please respect copyright.PENANAFlJd6CgzNL
鼻降咩~貝貝很努力學中文了,還會中文簽名了說~XDDDD(狂嘲笑(##905Please respect copyright.PENANAFZaRJQV253
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下一篇就是凌家大拷問了,雞泥、我是說付墨的敵人陸續增加啦XDDDDD905Please respect copyright.PENANAeiMpJXICMu
這就是篇虐渣前任小攻的文(欸別這樣wwww905Please respect copyright.PENANA5tubnTaRay
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歡迎追蹤噗浪和FB粉絲頁>////< 905Please respect copyright.PENANAqvTQSP32O5
噗浪:http://www.plurk.com/sakuhyde905Please respect copyright.PENANA5QYRt1eaGh
FB粉絲頁:https://www.facebook.com/meowbarksky905Please respect copyright.PENANAoOOhNdyOrz
拉貝爾角噗:http://www.plurk.com/LaBelleLavender905Please respect copyright.PENANAFEhEOAbNQ3
By 喵芭渴死姬 / 06.14.2014
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