次日午飯後我就去見工了。285Please respect copyright.PENANAvcEgOiUuJ5
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「誒…你好,我係鄧浩仁,想搵蔡姑娘呀。」社區中心門口個姐姐仔都幾索,但有啲西面,吩咐我坐一陣就無視我了。285Please respect copyright.PENANAECRBAoNlc6
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「鄧浩仁,入嚟房傾吖。」看似是肥婆蔡的女人叫我,她其實不算肥(相比起肥直和我),只是較為豐腴,有啲肉哋噉,出乎意料的頗為年青,看起來只有三十多歲,極其量也只算是中女吧。285Please respect copyright.PENANADmKQuIM0l2
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「你幫咗我哋大半年,都係第一次見面咋喎。」肥婆蔡長著plaza面,仲要戴橢圓形眼鏡,一副管家婆面相,但開場白都頗為客氣。285Please respect copyright.PENANAg7H7PcI7D1
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「哦~係呀,蔡姑娘,我都係第一次嚟中心咋。」由於肥直直接幫我搞晒註冊和登記出糧戶口等雜務,所以我從未在中心出現過。話說以前兼職炒散,手續比較簡便,起碼無「強姦金」呢啲搵笨實嘢,真係畀個名同戶口出糧就𠶧。285Please respect copyright.PENANAK9fJgHkaSP
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看著我帶去的學界比賽和拯溺證書,肥婆蔡的樣子有點迷茫,我賭佢根本唔識我嗰啲係乜嘢證書,果然她開口問我:「鄧浩仁,不如你解釋吓呢啲證書代表乜嘢吖。」285Please respect copyright.PENANAxobNDTLPjd
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(嗱,大家唔好以為我吹水吹上腦嘞,真人真事有證書有真相,今天回望原來我小時候在水系的履歷是相當不俗的,只是慣性被老媽睇死、被女友(老婆)丑化而已,哈~)285Please respect copyright.PENANAuU9YspUJRY
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(當然勿要跟阿里仔等天生明星相的高、富、帥比,先天和後天都贏在起跑線才是真正的人生勝利組。想去奧運?要錢、要父幹的~今時今日都是!)285Please respect copyright.PENANAkLteP6EeG7
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「哦,黃色嗰兩張係學界比賽嘅冠軍證書,其他就係拯溺嘅證書囉。銅章、磁章就係泳池當更嘅資格,銅十字同銀十字就喺沙灘當更嘅資格。」我自己都是第一次這樣介紹,事關以往人家一早都知這些證書的級別。285Please respect copyright.PENANAlTjotv80JE
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「嗯~但個班只要求有銅章就可以囉喎,你有4張拯溺證書即係代表乜嘢呢?」肥婆蔡問了一個相當低質的問題。285Please respect copyright.PENANAMoQvBsD9mb
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佢真係唔識㗎喎,即係代表乜嘢?!兩個字——猛料囉你鹵味。285Please respect copyright.PENANAQYp0GhFKPm
285Please respect copyright.PENANAW2CR1Oxcch
「誒…銅章即是我啡色呢張啦,其實係最基本嘅,噉其他都係比較高階啲囉,有時候有啲會所或者私人泳池會要求個救生員有高啲功力嘅。噉如果要去沙灘做,就要考十字證書囉,就我綠色呢張啦,香港都有私人沙灘請人要有高級啲嘅資格㗎。」雖然我盡力解釋畀佢聽,但我感覺如同向街市賣魚勝解釋一樣,唔識嘅點都係唔識。