Salty ones, I call ye to this useless contest.

Art thou exhausted from ye surroundings? People? Failed tests? Lagging computers? Cold Chinese takeout? Well, this place is the land of freedom. The land of stories where you would write about the thing, the person, the event that truly ticked you off to the maximum. I welcome sarcasm, strong, yet mild language, metaphors, and pettiness.

How to Win this Fantastic and Educational Contest:

1. You have to be super descriptive. Show, not tell. Search through your third grade English files.

2. I, the creator, will choose the story with the most upsetting story (and most hilariously/amazingly written story). I guess it's basically complaining about a certain thing (you choose), and you have to be so salty, I'll die of dehydration.

3. At least try to use correct spelling, grammar, punctuation, etc. It's okay if there are a few mistakes, but uh, reading it over won't shove poison down your throat and leave you in Antarctica to die.

4. Like I said before, I'll be searching for comedic, sarcastic, most whiny story ever. Well, maybe a bit less on whiny, but you get the point.

5. Minimum is 10 words (yes, ten. And I wrote MINIMUM, not MAXIMUM. Not trying to trick ya *winks and fails*). You cannot submit more than one entry.

6. Lastly, I don't mind passionate poems, flash/short paragraphs, etc. Doesn't matter, really. Just not nine words.

I'll add more onto the prompt if people ask questions. But I think it's pretty straight forward, right? And this is just for fun, so I'm not really expecting much. JK! I'm sure all of your writing are totes fetch. Sorry, probably used fetch wrong, but let it slide. Forgive me, Gretchen. ANYWAYS, gewd lock and POUR the gallons of salt ya'll have.