x
天亮，上班。198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡanC7ebO6tg
198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIBv2AEKrVE
擠進人山人海的車廂，心竟是難得的平靜。看著人們專注把玩手中的電子玩物，我心中更覺異常的安全。畢竟，好不容易才能擺脫熟人的注意。198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡO12hwoWO7w
198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6CoG2BiPmX
車廂一如往常，平穩中帶輕微搖晃，教本已帶睡意的乘客更為昏昏欲睡。有些嘴饞的人不理會廣播的呼籲，繼續進食，令人側目。198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4pEzJOm2pK
198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBLVFFoOorE
食物的細碎，像沙子一樣，在人們毫不注意的情況下，悄然掉在地上，再被無意地踏個粉碎。在接著的數個車站，人們再肆意加以踐踏，令碎粉再度粉碎。198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfqQ9WgIxWe
198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2sNCjg6h9Q
到站了，我有意無意地繞過人羣，「不經意」踏中那些有數隻小蟻的食物碎粉，心中是一陣少有的快意。幕門關上，我回頭望進車廂，想要看看被我蹂躪過的碎粉，但列車經已開駛。198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqd14c2qSO0
198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiNfxeNH4xA
看不見，罷。198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ65b1tQafEm
天黑，下班。198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzn6NfVzzDV
198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3sTVgFjaIa
身心俱疲。好不容易才與同路的男同事擠進車廂，繼續講上司的壞話。198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaM81Ee2u7m
198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX3pnhONs6m
「有蟻。」男同事突然指著快由我鞋面爬到小腿的一隻小螞蟻。198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTPMJXvuhad
198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡafgmMdTJNZ
我呆了。腦海中一片空白。不！有一個很遙遠的身影。那是誰？我看不見……我不想看見……198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqyK0YixwR2
198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5POiQtz51V
「啪」的一聲，男同事一手拍在我的小腿上，那隻螞蟻——扁了。198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeMV1LFcOpY
198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnBlIHrjzdy
「沒事了！」他笑了笑，問我：「你很怕小昆蟲？」198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJWIcuvpAcU
198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkibw4MTXQX
「不，只是怕蟻。」我感覺到，我的唇還在顫抖，但卻仍勉力一笑。198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzqper0wTiI
公司，午飯時間。198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoQ9L1YFHsy
198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuj2RL3P9lr
甲小姐正在上網看劇；乙先生在打盹；丙小姐外出吃飯去；丁先生仍在享用他那巨型飯盒；戊小姐……198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzBlzbR86m3
198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡd27PhYkjZB
看著同事們的百態，我突然覺得自己和他們一樣，都是很渺小的生命體，小得……有點兒……像……螞蟻。這是我最不想要看到的事，尤其是發生在我自己身上。大家營役勞碌，不也是只為求兩餐溫飽嗎？那與盲目求存的螞蟻有何分別？198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH3T3IQmZOG
198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ15yIh3tGnh
驀地，我看見一隻螞蟻在我手背上路過，卻沒意識去按扁它。我把手輕輕放在枱面上，讓它自然而然的爬走。看著它在牆角消失，我感到自己也消失了似的。198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1ciSh3IHXl
其實，真正的我只是一隻螞蟻，不過會偶爾做白日夢，幻想自己變成人類，過著那荒唐無稽的生活。那種生活，是有目的的付出，有希望的付出。每天朝著那所謂的「希望」跑，多奢侈！無他，這就是意義。198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmNGsHNQfFr
198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJlCVD04lHj
還是……198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3KIXJzWUTn
198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoFyJCmZpGd
其實，真正的我只是一個渺小的人類。不過會偶爾做白日夢，幻想自己是一隻蟻，過著那種沒頭沒腦的生活。那種生活很乏味，只懂一味尋找食物。無他，這就是生存！198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYwU5c4BvBw
公司，工作。198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJVxmVYJqQQ
198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7Ued0E4WHt
被上司罵個狗血淋頭。198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYbresDkdQY
198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwmJNQZPkAx
大家心知犯錯的不是我，奈何人是怕事的，只好把我推上斷頭台。事後，一句道歉或安慰也欠奉。198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQQN062Njwp
198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1lDXkpZmMY
很難過。我只好躲進廁格稍作自我冷靜。198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3Y2mf4ahXV
198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8gPDgJfQIj
剛巧，一隻螞蟻經過廁格。我毫不猶豫一腳踏扁它。198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqp4f67fWoN
198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ85DQLuTg1L
快意，笑了。198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmzt5p4sZRV
酒吧，喝酒。198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6ceSY0aaki
198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqLg4Tn2jTL
「你不是只怕螞蟻而已嗎？為何現在也怕酒起來？」男同事笑問。198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr52xLxqpSv
198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVwjs2ITdY4
「其實，我不大好喝酒。」我怯怯的道。198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYpFC2WNvLC
198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7EunbmjQzn
「還是……你根本不會喝酒？」他哈哈大笑。198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4TvnFekOEw
198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ71qRC2l6yc
聽著他那豁然開朗開朗的笑聲，我突然變得不大抗拒，乾脆把小杯裡的酒一飲而盡。198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaQUaJBjgtO
198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ83eJbf2GAo
醉倒。198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7SueVP0hmG
198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdmIqL4Jdrj
迷糊間，我看見男同事以螞蟻姿態爬上我的身體，不停遊走於每吋肌膚。他似乎沒停下來的意欲，想要到它的洞穴去……198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRJyG5g6LgJ
198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrsrhtHk4Mg
「上天取走你的一扇門，定會留給你一扇窗。」198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEoKBk2VZHu
198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9VtAS2brKB
今趟，上天留給我一隻螞蟻。我給其取名為「男朋友」。198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7n9zmpeuUO
假期，醫院。198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg6wpu0JPbA
198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnDM8RNgAJJ
媽就在這間醫院裡。她患了甚麼病，還未明確，因為報告要待下星期才會完成。198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjSG9wNzufl
198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEJIHHVUPrb
看見媽的時候，家中各人都是淚眼漣漣，很憂心。這種氣氛令健壯的人也難免感到窒息。198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0zeNj75f1Z
198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkSlQsKFBGd
「我覺得……」近幾天，媽的話都變得斷斷續續：「自己……」198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhEbQGcs7Ho
198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMqt3s9ygdR
大家都屏息靜氣，深怕這是她的最後一句話。198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡonmKWFNIsk
198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCwKYBlHUZ4
「自己是……一隻螞蟻……」她的聲音，輕如柔絲，但我知道大家都聽得很清楚。198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOUoT6tIvbe
198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoY2rQqbojQ
死寂。198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqMYQbAs1r4
198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0Nudq7QWrl
出乎我意料，這竟是她講得最清楚的一句話，不論是肉體還是心靈上。198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2zlcu2r6N3
回家，晚飯。198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWuvjjR9U1m
198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7DoWWgti57
一枱六椅，異常的沉默。電視的聲浪，掩不住大家的咀嚼聲——大家口中的食物似乎比鋼鐵更硬。我裝作不以為意，繼續吃。198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKuJOAJEqE5
198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQcDu0bVmPo
「很難吃。」爸突然放下筷子：「不如外出吃飯。」198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ25KFARcQbn
198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqOSsgGgRSg
妹放下筷子衝進房內，甩門；姨低下頭來，但她盯著枱上菜餚的怒目卻仍清晰可見；婆呆了，眼眶紅潤；我默默望著對面牆身上一隻偶然經過的螞蟻。198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4qhvXuSAEZ
198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIYyG4ngo7P
我心想：世界末日來臨後，地球會否只剩下這隻螞蟻？198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBbt4BQlTTg
每次望著媽，心中都生起莫名的感覺。我的腦海裡浮現出一隻螞蟻的模樣，彷彿她根本就是一隻螞蟻。198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD6RyiKYvYU
198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGUebU4RPD1
一隻螞蟻在做菜煮飯、洗衣拖地、燙衫抹窗……多可笑！就是因為她是一隻螞蟻，所以我從沒有幫忙做家務的念頭，去減輕她的負擔。198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡj9glACyz33
198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡywktBCgoPZ
久而久之，我每次一見到她，便會掉頭走。198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRMB61j7W3B
198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡamSqQVyHcO
但我知道，我永沒能走遠。198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSHe6WZn2lM
男友家，床上。198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ05gPODwhED
198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡywDGQskbgU
前奏後，男友進入極度興奮狀態，沒注意到我正在放空自己。在他還在我身上冒汗之時，我的思緒又飛往遙遠的他方去了——産房。198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDg5Z4exl1J
198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡui2SQSBQKm
産房內有一張床，床上有一隻非常細小的蟻后。她痛得不得了，是産婦們口中的十級痛楚。那表示，她要生産了。不消一會，整張床上都是幼蟻，恐怖非常。但她的身體卻沒停止的意識。現在幼蟻已攻陷整個産房、整間醫院、整個世界。198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdKf3wOTAEs
198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaZzwEzXDWr
我驚恐萬分之際，耳邊傳來蟻后的淒怨聲音：「他朝君體也相同！」198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK033gdoL8P
198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuhqihxNjPs
床上的我驚叫。男友以為我也感到興奮，於是更用力……198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3YfzCEm6Ai
舊生聚會，內地某酒家。198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyv2WrOOeTY
198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡglUpr83wAL
說也奇怪，舊生聚會竟會選擇在內地舉行。聽聞是聚會發起人的主意，說會給我們驚喜。198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJK0tFGjveO
198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0n58jh0h9A
「蟻宴？」我呆了，但逃不了。198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ96crI6jWk3
198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgMhNBLXfgv
「你有收看《天與地》嗎？」舊生甲吃一口紅蟻炒蛋。198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡotS3rnKfz3
198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvVx6D4wqUP
「有。人吃人那幕很震撼！」乙滿口黑蟻殘肢。198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWiwen43BEq
198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVJAAgMR7Ua
「結局何如？」丙一口氣喝下半碗白蟻湯。198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡI0KBas5bKP
198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfPuRvpP49T
「沒好下場！」丁邊說邊給我一碗黃蟻糖水。198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqkZONys4mB
198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8L82F3OYsF
「對！沒好下場！」我在心裡重覆著，衝到洗手間嘔吐大作。198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHc2I89HawL
男友有很多恐怖的寵物：蛇、蜥蝪、蜘蛛……每次做愛時，他都會放一些寵物在床邊，以增加他的性趣。198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT1WeZv9rqB
198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4HVy285zTj
今趟，床邊竟無任何寵物的蹤影。我暗喜。完事後，我不經意的問道：「你的寵物呢？」198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7SmGE88hiH
198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAHnGDeRAem
「在你體內。」198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUDL0t8ZWaC
198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡznem8m4s5K
「甚麼？」198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIx6QCXy4nV
198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7OQaRqzc4b
「蟻。」198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6zGKL28lGp
有一隻螞蟻住在我心內。198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtBaNc1Lo9w
198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtR5K2iCokM
它平常會做甚麼？做菜煮飯、洗衣拖地、燙衫抹窗……嗯，它會做的事真的很多，但從沒理會過我的感受。它憑甚麼闖進我的心、我的生活！它最好立刻消失！198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsFZqq2MdGf
198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMc23GZUJCz
結果，我生命中其中一隻螞蟻真的消失了。我依稀記得它的名字是「媽」。198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRIjFc22Kld
靈堂上，我一再向來賓欠身鞠躬。198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVdXgY1feiM
198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1dJfNuOvVK
「她真的死了嗎？」某君的聲音傳到我耳邊，但我心知那不是靈堂裡的人。198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgXBsRySr0v
198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcZw1hKLecf
「誰？」另一聲音反問。198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp9D79Z5idM
198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡc8d5vrOJl5
「二九三號表妹。」某君不耐煩的道：「她……」198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa7WtlAAXMJ
198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjUvHvw4adQ
靜。198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡexBowSCxS0
198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMJ1YMdJQxD
我回過神來，低頭一看——我剛不經意踏扁兩隻小蟻。198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuebD4HZuSh
我：「我的耳朵有毛病嗎？為何會聽到螞蟻講話？」198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLFScfwXsly
198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4fmZnQvaFo
醫：「不。是你的壓力過大，導致有幻聽。」198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2QR0teyCsw
198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKVhmeEg4Fm
我：「我有精神病？」198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuZfWuTPyoH
198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdeqVNFDVOU
醫：「是情緒病。」198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPWdwMIWesl
198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsdUJOP0l9E
我：「怎麼辦？」198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXDVLktGjoq
198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjkVdJr0ad9
醫：「我會處方一些藥物，你要按時服用；另外，你也要多休息……」198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡum6TgL1cJ2
198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPCD794pFiM
我：「謝謝醫生。」198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTSzw4giv7Y
198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwkaJCYswPL
醫：「不用謝。」198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcHOiOxPfDH
198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQALX4GTCa5
離開診所時，我回頭望一望地上的廣告牌——「馬義專科」。198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrVvXSn4Qhi
198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuQz5jgZ9Pa
不，我走近細看，是「虫馬虫義」專科。198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg69LggUEzo
總覺得體內有東西在蠶食著我。是蟻？198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGDB1cdYyl6
198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYs4UQEWY9k
醫生替我作身體檢查，一切正常；198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7Z6HIyEJHB
198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4FovGJeM5W
男友向我解釋，螞蟻之說，純粹幽默；198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡI39L7S8JsG
198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxIvxOgpDNX
同事都勸我休息，減少工作量；198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdAMV6wqAjd
198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu13P1Fdmx4
……198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjGJQ0VgnpL
198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1ZRZzIptw4
「真的有蟻在我體內！」我尖叫，奪門而出，從天台一躍而下，肝腦塗地。198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvei0mcAf47
198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaBNoRJA50H
臨死前，我看見那東西了——不是蟻，是……
註：此篇另收錄於短篇小說集《雜念集》。若此舉違規，煩請創挑主通知，願刪文。198Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡySNOUTzrVT
