每次想及那傢伙，他心裡難免生恨。可是恨不了多久，恨意自然而然會被無奈與無力取代，彷彿不曾生起。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2oKJuRxeYM
輕嘆一聲。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZVMy8ph6IG
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3wuY6ldzdN
媽媽的身影忽地浮現腦海。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrehdRcqtyo
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCLyjixlNRw
她是個不起眼的女人，普通得他早已忘記那張臉。只記得她怕熱，喜在夏日穿寬鬆短褲散熱，露出一雙細長白腿。他常趁著媽媽在露台忙於晾衫時，從後環抱她的大腿，把滾燙前額緊貼被清風吹得微微發涼的幼滑皮膚上。嘻，消暑妙法。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ102nckO3Sd
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD6M3C6Pgua
以為這做法可以持續至小學畢業，或是直到他世故成熟得無法繼續假裝天真。誰料媽媽突然拋下一句「感情變淡」，離家出走。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD6KbRfpYtX
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdsr3HvsANG
他反覆思考何謂「感情變淡」。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwOERdueOHQ
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAPz7dyJgSC
茫無頭緒，直至那傢伙有意無意向他指出重點：變。「感情」，對媽媽毫不重要，否則她不會狠心如此；「淡」是相對而非絕對，若無經歷過對立的「濃」，「淡」其實不是問題；由濃轉淡的過程稱為「變」，也就是問題癥結所在。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9zfdxbpemO
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRj8ihwWObo
為何會變？如何變？可否不變？355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ67yR1nwVwd
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFsUQ97l8kH
他百思不得其解。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡepZtsttdbi
再聲輕嘆。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtWFemoM2LR
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzvIh5PHyFd
阿杰的身影忽地浮現腦海。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtol22foKLx
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw4oTYoYiXF
舊同學聚會裡，他和阿杰並肩而坐。昔日無所不談的摯友相顧假笑，努力尋找共同話題。阿杰唇邊盡是紅酒遊艇名錶，他只記顧商場即將在週末舉行的購物優惠日——妻子叮囑他務必買下保濕精華和優惠裝尿片。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMNLFX2tueh
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7n0VtaNK1p
真懷念往時。他與阿杰一起為那些不值一哂的天大課題感到煩惱：學業、夢想、籃球、愛情、人生規劃……後來那傢伙教曉他——一切變幻莫測，根本不由自主。無力與無奈令他深深體會自身的無能。他妒忌，妒忌阿杰仍在那個未醒的夢裡。阿杰察覺到他的妒意，露出一個輕蔑笑容。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm0FLlml48v
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOZY1yoyKAV
昔日無所不談的摯友相顧假笑，不再努力尋找共同話題。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHgEM3kPAuG
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv3XxMprpk6
緣起緣滅，不由自主。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKJmMCkv8Pk
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ8MY8yH33r
既要緣滅，何必緣起？355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtCrrmZmiUh
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp9VLMHj0xK
他百思不得其解。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqHTEqEuJDH
輕嘆有三。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3FtM6tmpf3
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXaVnDgGwHi
自己的身影忽地浮現腦海。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡArIcHMiiXv
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZWhFhdTxFR
身影有前無後。難怪，少有留意自己的背。妻子笑說他背部有七痣，像北斗，可導航。他苦笑，笑自己人生無方向。因為自己看不見北斗？只好抬頭望天。天無星，難打卦。無卦，有掛，掛心的掛。掛甚麼？不知道，總覺得人生缺失了甚麼。甚麼甚麼？不知道，難以言明。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm9WQPqtPxf
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHiVqEfRTRf
鬱悶。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡS3v9cKFzfe
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFcA4XSwGdT
懷念媽媽的腿，想要抱抱。懷念阿杰手中的籃球，想要奪走。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcgRgbbs5Fu
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjMIQscClYf
去抱！去奪！355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSyFyPh3IPU
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtgH22zUlcQ
抱甚麼？腿已不在。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXfD9BDeMnY
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡL6CB1LtCgK
奪甚麼？球已不在。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzqDYN1ogew
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2xxXfQgxlm
為何不在？為何統統不在？355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJnQVEO2M9b
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQYhRohoWlk
那傢伙沒有回答，繼續前行。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlYjaYZ02oo
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPwBVcP5i18
停下來！355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx1SLXYYArr
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6BAh3o8Ugl
那傢伙沒有回答，繼續前行。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ22qaO1wmb3
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFEM17rigW8
慢下來！355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp66Giog8vo
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWFaq2mNFwm
那傢伙沒有回答，繼續前行。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡouJUOCAjX8
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXVc045ADMa
他只得拼命追趕。走馬看不見花，花開花落馬不知。馬累馬停，他累他停。回頭一望，是天不是地。何時開始背朝天？不肯定，許是拼命追趕期間、忘記自身當刻。竭力抬頭，盡力挺身。不果，只得餘生躬背望地，無法望背望星。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeCrgYIOLSj
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7nYisUjcD3
孫兒笑問他為何腰背變躬，他答背上擔子過重。孫兒受驚拒絕背負擔子，他說無法選擇，人人不由自主。孫兒再問何解不由自主，他道是變幻莫測之故。孫兒三問為何會變、如何變、可否不變？他答不出話來，淚目凝視孫兒。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDyNu7GTFva
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZgovz5sz7D
昔日的他，今日的孫。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDjtCe2eR5P
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjN3IlsBSza
永劫，輪迴。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfTHw2K4UFW
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡR9PmXESGpQ
不敢思，不求解。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ856aJvcXQU
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNSziwhRI2j
嘆，嘆，嘆。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh38niOudqb
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡluwNT0cQkm
孫兒問他是否有煩惱，願為他出謀解決。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWYZE0VySly
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJxV2qpbiAM
他搖頭。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqH1dQM5i3f
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFr84FwQS5T
深知世人永遠無法解決那傢伙。
註：此篇會收錄於短篇小說合集《雜念集》第八十一章355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA1KwiuCbwZ
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuIqg1tLXrM
