每次想及那傢伙，他心裡難免生恨。可是恨不了多久，恨意自然而然會被無奈與無力取代，彷彿不曾生起。352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqHdhYt0oLM
輕嘆一聲。352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPTUgGiAPXb
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtoO8HkbRlS
媽媽的身影忽地浮現腦海。352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ8PmvE8oso
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUUmXE0GLe6
她是個不起眼的女人，普通得他早已忘記那張臉。只記得她怕熱，喜在夏日穿寬鬆短褲散熱，露出一雙細長白腿。他常趁著媽媽在露台忙於晾衫時，從後環抱她的大腿，把滾燙前額緊貼被清風吹得微微發涼的幼滑皮膚上。嘻，消暑妙法。352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDXmLP7yeal
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmtkxSWyRR3
以為這做法可以持續至小學畢業，或是直到他世故成熟得無法繼續假裝天真。誰料媽媽突然拋下一句「感情變淡」，離家出走。352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgz39PPuBkq
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkxcAwpUDeD
他反覆思考何謂「感情變淡」。352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyDK0w7l7pP
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu5KKHjSKOp
茫無頭緒，直至那傢伙有意無意向他指出重點：變。「感情」，對媽媽毫不重要，否則她不會狠心如此；「淡」是相對而非絕對，若無經歷過對立的「濃」，「淡」其實不是問題；由濃轉淡的過程稱為「變」，也就是問題癥結所在。352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoSdIwrTZxj
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ06Zyxuq9P
為何會變？如何變？可否不變？352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKAFJbgADXQ
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCiuHkQdxYn
他百思不得其解。352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgTFSvrSFeK
再聲輕嘆。352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvi7AqEzYqz
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf2FUvEWMkv
阿杰的身影忽地浮現腦海。352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6mLgYSHPBm
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEaRTpzG6BD
舊同學聚會裡，他和阿杰並肩而坐。昔日無所不談的摯友相顧假笑，努力尋找共同話題。阿杰唇邊盡是紅酒遊艇名錶，他只記顧商場即將在週末舉行的購物優惠日——妻子叮囑他務必買下保濕精華和優惠裝尿片。352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlmDUfbCOLW
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡorxYljQ7kB
真懷念往時。他與阿杰一起為那些不值一哂的天大課題感到煩惱：學業、夢想、籃球、愛情、人生規劃……後來那傢伙教曉他——一切變幻莫測，根本不由自主。無力與無奈令他深深體會自身的無能。他妒忌，妒忌阿杰仍在那個未醒的夢裡。阿杰察覺到他的妒意，露出一個輕蔑笑容。352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡn8l0AaMHLu
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh8qf9OVszC
昔日無所不談的摯友相顧假笑，不再努力尋找共同話題。352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡn8LYO7ySbX
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdL23sqQ7YE
緣起緣滅，不由自主。352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwxqjKvQRVy
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwbm2Se2uky
既要緣滅，何必緣起？352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTY2Yw8uZnz
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTo1u2sAe4s
他百思不得其解。352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5GJx62HrAT
輕嘆有三。352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA7MqxbpTZf
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAhfDsQCjMB
自己的身影忽地浮現腦海。352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ24y51mMoN5
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡc7eozVE1Fp
身影有前無後。難怪，少有留意自己的背。妻子笑說他背部有七痣，像北斗，可導航。他苦笑，笑自己人生無方向。因為自己看不見北斗？只好抬頭望天。天無星，難打卦。無卦，有掛，掛心的掛。掛甚麼？不知道，總覺得人生缺失了甚麼。甚麼甚麼？不知道，難以言明。352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡczAVC0BlT6
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv1KjrALCZx
鬱悶。352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtyev1SwGdl
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjpBxElYZye
懷念媽媽的腿，想要抱抱。懷念阿杰手中的籃球，想要奪走。352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdPgdVb11aD
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWngAdN0EcB
去抱！去奪！352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNknWQ5unkK
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdxvK8bS0L6
抱甚麼？腿已不在。352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgygEFLRdzc
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIrCmwbITSE
奪甚麼？球已不在。352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡY6mRQw2ral
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡk0qwr4BBiL
為何不在？為何統統不在？352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOaXcstv9GV
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT8tO5YriHd
那傢伙沒有回答，繼續前行。352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHgRIdG3o8Q
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa575V02n53
停下來！352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMmzlrCVBiM
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcnLLtESJo6
那傢伙沒有回答，繼續前行。352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3lbK1m07sf
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ77O33fIUWm
慢下來！352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ90LH3NHuXV
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvnrDYLk6FV
那傢伙沒有回答，繼續前行。352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ02QKKcVgUY
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeSeSvDpY7E
他只得拼命追趕。走馬看不見花，花開花落馬不知。馬累馬停，他累他停。回頭一望，是天不是地。何時開始背朝天？不肯定，許是拼命追趕期間、忘記自身當刻。竭力抬頭，盡力挺身。不果，只得餘生躬背望地，無法望背望星。352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgkmwIUc8Kc
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRxkvYc6jnz
孫兒笑問他為何腰背變躬，他答背上擔子過重。孫兒受驚拒絕背負擔子，他說無法選擇，人人不由自主。孫兒再問何解不由自主，他道是變幻莫測之故。孫兒三問為何會變、如何變、可否不變？他答不出話來，淚目凝視孫兒。352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ09GuHP5A85
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡazDqJ2Izu9
昔日的他，今日的孫。352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoxms9o67YF
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpdsvi60ZJj
永劫，輪迴。352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSbRLWRZTro
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1yFcrzwfmy
不敢思，不求解。352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUL4rY8VMTv
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqkNaL34kHK
嘆，嘆，嘆。352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1QQbzg7aMV
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRsv3KHccqr
孫兒問他是否有煩惱，願為他出謀解決。352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvPPY2NNW4Q
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhA0L5Kigeo
他搖頭。352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡC98c1vzbZj
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6NuRLdoosk
深知世人永遠無法解決那傢伙。
註：此篇會收錄於短篇小說合集《雜念集》第八十一章352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb1CMDCna7v
352Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmnDW97F8Fc
