
hewo~! okay, anyways. idk what i'm doing but have fun reading, i guess.
1. recall your most embarrassing memory437Please respect copyright.PENANABly9lasXWq
okay. welp, this is going to be weird to write about. okay, so, i was in 5th grade and i had the audacity to sign up for the talent show. so, i signed up and i went to rehearsal, right? i cried in front everyone at rehearsal. then the next night, we had a night where all the kids in the talent show performed in front everyone's parents. what did i do? i cried. again. then the next day, we peformed again but it was in front of the entire school, including my crush. mind you, i was wearing this ugly dress and i thought i was cute. then we were back in that era where we thought the orange justice dance was the shit. so, muy friend was shy and she was dancing so i went out onto the stage with her and danced sicne for some reason, i knew the entire dance to the entire song..? then my turn came and i had to put the ugly dress on, i went on stage and started to sing rise up by andra day and what did i do, once again? i fucking cried. yep. in front of my crush and everything. life sucks, mate.
2. think about the last time that you laughed until you cried. 437Please respect copyright.PENANAPG5cCjAs7C
that had to be like yesterday. i think i laughed at something bunny said and then started crying because it was so funny. maybe it wasn't yesterday but it was damn near last week or something. eh, idgaf.
3. write a story about what would happen if your day went in reverse. hint: the story would begin when you were in your pajamas and ready for bed.437Please respect copyright.PENANAR2VJOr7EAc
*acting like a vlogger on youtube from 2016* hi, guys. so, i'm in bed right now. i can't get back up for a few more hours because of my schedule. *a few hours earlier..?* okay, hi. i'm in the bathroom right now taking my clothes off and using the shower. *after shower* i'm putting my clothes back on now. hold on, ms. shi! i'm getting undressed. --- omfg, i can't do this. it's too weird.
5. what was the best joke that you heard during the last week? what made that joke so funny to you?437Please respect copyright.PENANAlE3d5I3aZT
the funniest joke to me in the past week was said on saturday when we were at barnes & noble. lovely, bunny and i were sitting in the little kids section, reading when out of no where lovely said, 'are you eleven protons because you're sodium fine.' and i stared at her. then i realized what she said and i started cackling.
6. make a list of your favorite puns.437Please respect copyright.PENANAkmqrR4766I
i might seem lame right now but i don't pay attention to puns...
7. write a movie review about the funniest movie that you have ever seen.437Please respect copyright.PENANAodevE1fn2F
*acting like a famous journalist* hello, my name is alex ugliana. today i am going to write a movie review about the movie- i give up. i'm not good at explaining things without spoiling it.
8. pretend that you are going to be performing a stand-up comedy act for your friends and family members. write a draft of what your act might sound like.437Please respect copyright.PENANAM1hupgwEp7
hehe, okay. *clears throat and gets accent ready* *using "country" accent* hey there, y'all! my name is alex and i'm here tahday tah tell yeh fellers about the trump family! i believe thet man, donald trump, was a good president. and that's not jest becuz i'm caucasian and african amurican. i swear tah yer, he was a good man in my eyes. omfg, i give up. wtf am i writing? *yeets self into dumpster*
9. consider something that you are most scared of, and then write a story about a character encountering that fear. make sure the character has a reaction to their fear that is so exaggerated it becomes funny.437Please respect copyright.PENANAdKK4xd6jPK
okay, lemme try this. i'm scared of the dark. lemma alone. omg. anyways-- genevieve walked into her home late at night. "i knew i shouldn't have gone to that stupid 'get together'." she groans --bitch wtf--. her house was pitch black. she couldn't see anything as she took off her shoes. she tried to flip on a light switch. it didn't work. she tried over and over again. "holy fuck, did i pay the light bill?" she said --shoulda never sucked dick for free, genevieve. omg, i'm going to hell-- she digs in her pocket for her phone. she turned on the flashlight. she walked through her house, heart beating like crazy, mind running at what could've caused her lights not to work. she walks past the couch and the corner of the couch grazes her thigh. she screams bloody murder. "oh my fucking god!" she screams and runs through her house like a little bitch. she runs into the kitchen counter. "ouch!" she yells. she goes for another light switch. it doesn't work either. she screams even louder. she runs to her room and flips on the light. she breathes a heavy sigh, seeing the darkness disappear from the light. --you know what? i declare gore!-- then a blade stabs into her neck. she gasps and chokes up blood, holding her neck. she bleeds all over her carpets. thoughts are running through her mind. am i dying? eh, i don't care. oh my fucking god! there is blood on my carpets! wait- who stabbed me? she turns around and there is the dark behind her. she falls to the ground and dies. you know, i liked where that went. morbid as fuck but who gives a shit. i liked it. i'm weird. anyways-- NEXT~!
10. how would you describe your own sense of humor?437Please respect copyright.PENANArkDx0o9yD4
i would descibe my sense of humor to be kind of morbid, kind of crazy, not really that funny but somehow funny to other people. i think i'm a crackhead that doesn't do crack....make sense? yeah? okay, bye.
11. write a list of funny excuses that you could use to get out of doing your homework.437Please respect copyright.PENANAfDQxMaN0af
okay, bet. number one - so what had happened was, i didn't really know what to do so i gave it to my mom and she got angry with it so she gave it back to me and told me to get the fuck out of her room so i went to the mall and got on the airplane and drove to japan and then i biked to south korea over the sea and i dropped it on my way to south korea. so it's in the ocean between japan and south korea. i mean, feel free to look in the ocean. i hope you don't drown. *silently wishing for them to drown* *smiles all inocently* number two - my pet dragon at it. number three - i got free tickets to a bts concert with backstage tickets and i needed the paper to make a poster for bts. number four - i cried and got it all wet and then my little brother got hungry so i fed my brother my homework for dinner because i was depression and did not feel like cooking. number five - wait- we had homework? oh my god, was that what i used to pick up my unicorn's shit? i'm so sorry! number six - i lost it in zamunda. you don't know what zamunda is? oh my god, it's in africa. what type of social studies teacher are you? what the fuck do you mean, 'why was i in zamunda'? i was studying, idiot. number seven - i was sick and i used the paper as toilet paper. don't ask me what sickness i had, you icky nasty, oh my god! you disgust me. okay, lemme stop.
12. write a funny short story in which the main character is your alter ego/you.437Please respect copyright.PENANAphis1uCRkP
funny? mm. i'll see if i can do it. so first here is my ego or aura, whatever. i'm nice, sweet, funny, "pretty", adorable, friendly, sometimes ghetto especially when i'm mad and i seem very social but i really don't like people. so, my alter ego would be someone who absolutely the opposite except for the fact that i'd still be funny and ghetto. story (btw this'll be like when i first moved here so jazzy won't be in this): i walk down the stairs of my new group home. all the heads turn towards me. the staff, bunny, gorgeous and kitkat. they all look at me, wide-eyed. i sigh, heavily and walk towards them, not wanting to get to know them. "hi." gorgeous says. "wassup." i say, sliding my hoodie on. omg, i give up. i can't do this lmao.
13. have you ever tried to use your own sense of humor to impress someone? write about whether or not your jokes worked their magic.437Please respect copyright.PENANA3hEEQOyC5f
i mean, yeah, mate. how do you think i have emmi? she likes me because i'm pretty, funny, loud/energetic, and i kind of don't care what people think about me.
14. think about an inside joke that you share with a friend or family member. how did that inside joke come to be? 437Please respect copyright.PENANAYJwgLsjUvr
bet~! me and bunny were just doing it. free real estate. i walked up to her one day and slid my hand down her arm and said that in a weird/seductive way and ever since then, it's been a thing. we were just trying to explain it to her boyfriend, lion. and yesterday, we were watching a movie and the thingy said in a british accent, 'and i'm greedy with the soup.' so now, that's a thing. we have too many inside jokes. i make too many jokes.
~~
i guess i'm doing those question things again. emmi looks sexy today, holy shet. anyways--
~~
full name? - lady leilani waterton of dogde charger.437Please respect copyright.PENANARxmzCeiPMF
girl bestie? - coco <3437Please respect copyright.PENANAFr886BLXAt
boy bestie? - idek anymore. i need a boy bestie.437Please respect copyright.PENANABaYHkB1dyG
age? - seven years old.437Please respect copyright.PENANAIlhwv0Tvys
last person i texted? - idfk.437Please respect copyright.PENANABwixDeKMdh
last person i called? - probably my little brother.437Please respect copyright.PENANAm2T15YSbR6
current crush? - my girlfriend, emmi, tf?437Please respect copyright.PENANAO7OxxE8OXd
random fact? - i like food.437Please respect copyright.PENANAqDTnkEDr36
single or taken? - big, fat taken.437Please respect copyright.PENANASJQdAJALMJ
favourite quote? - if it delicious, it's zero calories. said by wwh.437Please respect copyright.PENANA4qlVRXV9uI
first kiss? - bitch wtf?437Please respect copyright.PENANAAwZy5KmENq
ever smoked? - nope.437Please respect copyright.PENANAsJIzhXWDdA
ever done drugs? - nope~437Please respect copyright.PENANAVDFYBI3KzO
ever been drunk? - i don't drink.437Please respect copyright.PENANAGKBQND9ac1
longest relationship? - five and a half months.437Please respect copyright.PENANAcG1cTuSSQg
pet peeve? - my little brother. his entire existent. but i still love him.437Please respect copyright.PENANAq0JlK4BzsD
eye colour? - brown. my little brother's eyes are really pretty.437Please respect copyright.PENANARN6JLozWc3
birthday? - 1930.01.01-- nah, i'm playing but no one needs to know my birthday.437Please respect copyright.PENANAsgxT91AnFb
obsession? - kpop.437Please respect copyright.PENANA7gJqZkQNTg
do you give second chances? - that depends.437Please respect copyright.PENANAqZcDkRYque
play any sports? - no, bitch. the hell do i look like?437Please respect copyright.PENANAEWK0AjiGYx
dream job? - kpop idol or just a singer in general.437Please respect copyright.PENANA85IyFdA16l
day or night? - idk.437Please respect copyright.PENANAZGV7fwzFrN
your idea of a perfec date? - idk.437Please respect copyright.PENANAp47jgl6RR3
sing in the shower? - yes, motherfucker. i throw whole ass concerts in the shower.437Please respect copyright.PENANATjWivnukpm
favourite colour(s)? - purple and black.437Please respect copyright.PENANAYutlPbsG8Z
any tattoos? - nope. i'm lame.437Please respect copyright.PENANAVw4ouatY63
any peircings? - yes, in my ears.437Please respect copyright.PENANAIIIoPVOMSF
favourite movie(s)? - idk.437Please respect copyright.PENANADb2QhnMGqF
current mood? - bored and tired.437Please respect copyright.PENANAhH59hy6PqP
jealous of? - a lot of things.437Please respect copyright.PENANAplUNIctnEX
place you want to visit? - south korea and cambodia.437Please respect copyright.PENANA9kOfO2WTPS
pets? - two dogs.437Please respect copyright.PENANAPfKlh7FXa1
last song you listened to? - spring day and currently listening to crystal snow and trying not to cry. so far succesful in not crying and the song is ending.437Please respect copyright.PENANAKIwwzaWEzV
favourite number? - seven.437Please respect copyright.PENANAW9S7m8ri3V
nicknames? - vanilla, alex, suga, steph.437Please respect copyright.PENANADNGuTxwg1D
siblings? - 5 older sisters and 2 brothers.437Please respect copyright.PENANApqO1OCcfZA
afraid of the dark? - yes.437Please respect copyright.PENANARmsTLFLEJo
one wish? - to be happy for real.437Please respect copyright.PENANALPDPjKUw22
something you want to do!? - live life. vibe, you know?437Please respect copyright.PENANAOCBHLOXk8B
~437Please respect copyright.PENANAbzI841DIZZ
full name? - mind your fucking business, damn.437Please respect copyright.PENANALnxqE2PBWl
age? - i'm still seven years old.437Please respect copyright.PENANAn1Jh1npSlS
idols? - bts, stray kids, blackpink, kamla harris, etc.437Please respect copyright.PENANApuK85RyFBO
something you hate about yourself? - my body.437Please respect copyright.PENANAtYlTtLeXd9
something you like about yourself? - idk.437Please respect copyright.PENANAaeruWPXQ3A
someone you hate? - jason derulo and donald trump.437Please respect copyright.PENANAKPVobmnq6b
favourite band? - bts.437Please respect copyright.PENANARnoBMgjmpt
say 'sexy' what do you think of? - that time when stray kids was still nine members and they were roleplaying. felix was a grand father and he has this old man voice and it was still sexy but funny. but that's not it. he said sexy instead of saekshi, i guess and woojin corrected him and felix kept saying saekshi over and over. oh, i also think of bts and just-- agh!437Please respect copyright.PENANAsm7ZQVhqSE
ever had a boyfriend/girlfriend? - no, of course not.437Please respect copyright.PENANAfFlrdzu1GQ
where do you want to be right now? - idk. south korea.437Please respect copyright.PENANA6RhgvA8zaN
girl crush? - emmi.437Please respect copyright.PENANAh6mqigwQBe
boy crush? - bts. plural, bitch.437Please respect copyright.PENANAfEGKFjP4X4
an embarrassing memory? - look at this top ^437Please respect copyright.PENANAomJ7PVWyT2
talents? - singing.437Please respect copyright.PENANARF4wCrnHgj
soemone i miss? - my step-mom.437Please respect copyright.PENANAUVWAPIIsuI
someone i love? - emmi.437Please respect copyright.PENANAh6cMDUa2XF
my future goals? - idk. graduate school. succeed in life, i guess.437Please respect copyright.PENANAS4XOhiKnBc
a confession? - i am not ninety-one years old.437Please respect copyright.PENANAZmkz6cx6Hc
something i'm addicted to? - love and affection even though i don't get a lot of them. oh, also, drugs! yeah, no. i'm playing.437Please respect copyright.PENANA8T28X0t3Ly
favourite animal? - dogs.437Please respect copyright.PENANAwrNwiTGTOG
favourite tv couples? - weiyoung and touba jun. minde and di. jin-wook and yu-mi. spongebob and sandy. probably more but i don't feel like going through them all. 437Please respect copyright.PENANAkxYDwCNCXi
ships? - namjin, jikook, taekook, sope.437Please respect copyright.PENANAaCUPht2zAu
worst movie you've ever saw? - i don't remember what it was called but it was just terrible. i was so cunfused.437Please respect copyright.PENANAB4Hl7vpReQ
what's your biggest wish? - to be a singer.437Please respect copyright.PENANAimBFraKRJv
bad habits? - hitting people out of affection. being sarcastic.437Please respect copyright.PENANAB3tVGuLc3y
food you hate? - pineapple pizza, school luch fried chicken because that chicken be fake and disgusting. caviar. 437Please respect copyright.PENANAQv8i5EbVjL
hair colour? - brown. i'm ugly as fuck so when i say i feel sexy, ignore that shit.437Please respect copyright.PENANAv9fzNILoKU
favourite kind of ice cream? - cookies & cream and chocolate.437Please respect copyright.PENANAhkqNjBaoVC
~437Please respect copyright.PENANA9QDhpyKE0Z
gender? - oppa attack helicopter and/or female.437Please respect copyright.PENANAs6KVgkD5Uy
country? - i don't live on earth. 437Please respect copyright.PENANAtwj2sT4HmK
languages you speak? - lunarian, trigedasleng, english, tiny korean, sorta french, kinda spanish.437Please respect copyright.PENANAlUozd87jfz
last lie you told? - that i'm pretty.437Please respect copyright.PENANA1LM2Kh0W7x
favourite subject in school? - english language arts.437Please respect copyright.PENANAAQh9vjxaIZ
most expensive item you own? - a pair of vans.437Please respect copyright.PENANAaw0Z1ZTliN
country with your favourite accent? - australia.437Please respect copyright.PENANAqzCTSgPx7S
do you have any children? - i was about to answer like, bitch wtf, no. but i do. li minde, touba jun, touba yu, cheng de, li weiyoung, jun tao, bai zhi, jungkook, jennie, lisa, ni-ki, all of txt, jasper from the 100, etc. i have a lot of kids.437Please respect copyright.PENANAzz7N5p9aoI
dog or cat person? - both.437Please respect copyright.PENANAtYpeKXeent
first kiss? if so, what age? - yes. thirteen years old.437Please respect copyright.PENANAxOfIMACQJP
do you live in a house or apartment? - nosy, i declare. i live in a house. damn.437Please respect copyright.PENANAhEe5bNPQtH
do you belive in God? - idk.437Please respect copyright.PENANAz2AinqLc51
single or taken? - taken.437Please respect copyright.PENANA7X6xycrFjz
favourite body part of the opposite gender? - well, damn. heh heh. nah, perverts. torso and hands, omg. *dies*437Please respect copyright.PENANAqQGvnbhGok
birthday year? - 1930.437Please respect copyright.PENANAQTI8WlAKSH
celebrity crush? - holy fuck, dude. i have a lot.437Please respect copyright.PENANATs39Tm2UKH
age? - what's that?437Please respect copyright.PENANAraFoSGNofr
enthinicity? - african american.437Please respect copyright.PENANAWaTm8NeItM
tea or coffee? - neither.437Please respect copyright.PENANAPyjLZy64zX
random skill you have? - i can make people smile.437Please respect copyright.PENANArl4MH1fBev
prefer hugs or kisses? - i mean, both. *slow motion walks looking stupid as fuck*437Please respect copyright.PENANA2yMVO9lIj0
favourite food? - ice cream.437Please respect copyright.PENANAINnCfd13KP
last person you saw naked? - myself, you fucking icky nasty. 437Please respect copyright.PENANAFvKtodaO68
shared nudes? - damn, people are nosy but yes.437Please respect copyright.PENANAGEqxwmr126
eye colour? - the rainbow. get on my level.437Please respect copyright.PENANA8fSL6BkbKN
favourite soda? - sprite.437Please respect copyright.PENANAGqeFcn3ghA
biggest pet peeve? - people being people.437Please respect copyright.PENANAaoWRVkywJp
can you swim? - yes, wtf?437Please respect copyright.PENANAwHphQZfZ9V
favourite song at the moment? - 19 by stray kids but that could change every 2 seconds. honestly i don't think i have a favourite song.437Please respect copyright.PENANA3mCC4Mtd1n
do you watch porn? - no, but i have with my cousin and her friends because we wanted to see the tony lopez leaked video so we searched porn hub. one thing went to another and we ended up seeing an apparent james charles leaked sex tape and then my cousin and her friend sat there and watched a bondage for like an hour while me and her other friend decided to cleanse our eyes with bleach and protect our assholes.437Please respect copyright.PENANALacuoyNHtH
virgin? - yes, omg. nasty.437Please respect copyright.PENANAs8HVNRpihk
favourite social media platform(s) - twitter, weverse, snapchat.437Please respect copyright.PENANAFVLTbpsvO3
colour of your current bed sheets? - weird question but, uhm, they're grey...yep *nodding*437Please respect copyright.PENANAG2CHOqqTpr
apple or andriod? - apple.437Please respect copyright.PENANA8Zf4rgfySp
best dessert? - mochi.437Please respect copyright.PENANAOCtPWjrafB
~437Please respect copyright.PENANAqM2NSuCoLf
have you ever:437Please respect copyright.PENANALPJMlIydf2
1. skipped class? - yes.437Please respect copyright.PENANA2MqchEMb7A
2. done drugs? - no.437Please respect copyright.PENANAmoCI5ANvmp
3. self-harmed? - yes.437Please respect copyright.PENANArShwUeAP3n
4. drank? - no.437Please respect copyright.PENANABiPhgalZ6H
5. shoplifted? - yes.437Please respect copyright.PENANAVhkZqLTYpL
6. gotten a tattoo? - no.437Please respect copyright.PENANAT3Dm9pwC4r
7. broken up with someone? - yes.437Please respect copyright.PENANADPrFoc4mIa
what's your favourite:437Please respect copyright.PENANAbYVJYsSbAT
8. show? - the princess weiyoung.437Please respect copyright.PENANAh8dVBPtfrR
9. movie? - break the silence.437Please respect copyright.PENANA9OJZAWl1UF
10. song? - idk anymore and i just answered that, like, 5 minutes ago, omg.437Please respect copyright.PENANAds7xmykRyJ
11. artist? - bts.437Please respect copyright.PENANAFOBKBHHbGK
12. singer or band? - bts.437Please respect copyright.PENANAQ316U6THYi
13. memory? - idk.437Please respect copyright.PENANA1RRIENDGbd
14. book? - the cruel prince.437Please respect copyright.PENANAmtPkOhq3ge
this or that:437Please respect copyright.PENANAsvkGrm6enc
15. invisibility or ability to fly? - fly.437Please respect copyright.PENANAA5T7qeUsDt
16. cookies or cake? - cookies.437Please respect copyright.PENANAmCCsPOtYkG
17. twitter or facebook? - twitter.437Please respect copyright.PENANAbqKboAMg7t
18. movies or books? - idk.437Please respect copyright.PENANALXjFcbNdV2
19. coke or sprite? - sprite.437Please respect copyright.PENANAtCeGzu9V08
20. blind of deaf? - blind.437Please respect copyright.PENANAgHboz5mvtT
21. tea or coffee? - neither.437Please respect copyright.PENANADYWORTSFo5
what's your:437Please respect copyright.PENANAH1GRZgddgJ
22. age? - ninety-one.437Please respect copyright.PENANAYPYDLLll91
23. zodiac sign? - virgo/libra cusp.437Please respect copyright.PENANAanIuETQzso
24. height? - 4'11.437Please respect copyright.PENANA0lNQMNGmMy
25. sexual orientation? - bisexual.437Please respect copyright.PENANAlNAJd1zPQ4
26. shoe size? - seven.437Please respect copyright.PENANAVGr4sJhseC
27. religion? - i'm not religious.437Please respect copyright.PENANAcx8TZZ3Gz0
28. longest relationship? - like, five months.437Please respect copyright.PENANA330FfcLw0C
opinion on: 437Please respect copyright.PENANA8A0xHFbZvq
29. gay rights? - i'm gay...437Please respect copyright.PENANATwIGHbhItQ
30. second chances? - it depends.437Please respect copyright.PENANA7BAmeMUFhG
31. long distance relationships? - don't get hurt, baby.437Please respect copyright.PENANApcyJqs4W7f
32. abortion? - ew.437Please respect copyright.PENANAumKLFP8dSw
33. a death penalty? - ew.437Please respect copyright.PENANAmRdJ5e7SvZ
34. marijuana? - i likes that.437Please respect copyright.PENANAZ2Fj3tVC8k
35. love? - what's love?437Please respect copyright.PENANAI5Gjilew6P
do you:437Please respect copyright.PENANA7xkYYzHpwI
36. belive in ghosts? - sorta kinda.437Please respect copyright.PENANAF3r4iGNgSK
437Please respect copyright.PENANAXCpYzkDQsK
omg, bye. i'm tired of this.
- Alex <3437Please respect copyright.PENANAukgMSuSSDn