
hewo~! okay, anyways. idk what i'm doing but have fun reading, i guess.
1. recall your most embarrassing memory438Please respect copyright.PENANA7SjO5R3Tue
okay. welp, this is going to be weird to write about. okay, so, i was in 5th grade and i had the audacity to sign up for the talent show. so, i signed up and i went to rehearsal, right? i cried in front everyone at rehearsal. then the next night, we had a night where all the kids in the talent show performed in front everyone's parents. what did i do? i cried. again. then the next day, we peformed again but it was in front of the entire school, including my crush. mind you, i was wearing this ugly dress and i thought i was cute. then we were back in that era where we thought the orange justice dance was the shit. so, muy friend was shy and she was dancing so i went out onto the stage with her and danced sicne for some reason, i knew the entire dance to the entire song..? then my turn came and i had to put the ugly dress on, i went on stage and started to sing rise up by andra day and what did i do, once again? i fucking cried. yep. in front of my crush and everything. life sucks, mate.
2. think about the last time that you laughed until you cried. 438Please respect copyright.PENANAAvmPLVjqLI
that had to be like yesterday. i think i laughed at something bunny said and then started crying because it was so funny. maybe it wasn't yesterday but it was damn near last week or something. eh, idgaf.
3. write a story about what would happen if your day went in reverse. hint: the story would begin when you were in your pajamas and ready for bed.438Please respect copyright.PENANAYYuLjqLNFO
*acting like a vlogger on youtube from 2016* hi, guys. so, i'm in bed right now. i can't get back up for a few more hours because of my schedule. *a few hours earlier..?* okay, hi. i'm in the bathroom right now taking my clothes off and using the shower. *after shower* i'm putting my clothes back on now. hold on, ms. shi! i'm getting undressed. --- omfg, i can't do this. it's too weird.
5. what was the best joke that you heard during the last week? what made that joke so funny to you?438Please respect copyright.PENANA2PeRs0Rovm
the funniest joke to me in the past week was said on saturday when we were at barnes & noble. lovely, bunny and i were sitting in the little kids section, reading when out of no where lovely said, 'are you eleven protons because you're sodium fine.' and i stared at her. then i realized what she said and i started cackling.
6. make a list of your favorite puns.438Please respect copyright.PENANACybnibGE8J
i might seem lame right now but i don't pay attention to puns...
7. write a movie review about the funniest movie that you have ever seen.438Please respect copyright.PENANAI3AYCC8vya
*acting like a famous journalist* hello, my name is alex ugliana. today i am going to write a movie review about the movie- i give up. i'm not good at explaining things without spoiling it.
8. pretend that you are going to be performing a stand-up comedy act for your friends and family members. write a draft of what your act might sound like.438Please respect copyright.PENANAPrlkDliJ8G
hehe, okay. *clears throat and gets accent ready* *using "country" accent* hey there, y'all! my name is alex and i'm here tahday tah tell yeh fellers about the trump family! i believe thet man, donald trump, was a good president. and that's not jest becuz i'm caucasian and african amurican. i swear tah yer, he was a good man in my eyes. omfg, i give up. wtf am i writing? *yeets self into dumpster*
9. consider something that you are most scared of, and then write a story about a character encountering that fear. make sure the character has a reaction to their fear that is so exaggerated it becomes funny.438Please respect copyright.PENANA8QwA0DBqNB
okay, lemme try this. i'm scared of the dark. lemma alone. omg. anyways-- genevieve walked into her home late at night. "i knew i shouldn't have gone to that stupid 'get together'." she groans --bitch wtf--. her house was pitch black. she couldn't see anything as she took off her shoes. she tried to flip on a light switch. it didn't work. she tried over and over again. "holy fuck, did i pay the light bill?" she said --shoulda never sucked dick for free, genevieve. omg, i'm going to hell-- she digs in her pocket for her phone. she turned on the flashlight. she walked through her house, heart beating like crazy, mind running at what could've caused her lights not to work. she walks past the couch and the corner of the couch grazes her thigh. she screams bloody murder. "oh my fucking god!" she screams and runs through her house like a little bitch. she runs into the kitchen counter. "ouch!" she yells. she goes for another light switch. it doesn't work either. she screams even louder. she runs to her room and flips on the light. she breathes a heavy sigh, seeing the darkness disappear from the light. --you know what? i declare gore!-- then a blade stabs into her neck. she gasps and chokes up blood, holding her neck. she bleeds all over her carpets. thoughts are running through her mind. am i dying? eh, i don't care. oh my fucking god! there is blood on my carpets! wait- who stabbed me? she turns around and there is the dark behind her. she falls to the ground and dies. you know, i liked where that went. morbid as fuck but who gives a shit. i liked it. i'm weird. anyways-- NEXT~!
10. how would you describe your own sense of humor?438Please respect copyright.PENANA99dmN5Yirx
i would descibe my sense of humor to be kind of morbid, kind of crazy, not really that funny but somehow funny to other people. i think i'm a crackhead that doesn't do crack....make sense? yeah? okay, bye.
11. write a list of funny excuses that you could use to get out of doing your homework.438Please respect copyright.PENANAxLB22ld6PY
okay, bet. number one - so what had happened was, i didn't really know what to do so i gave it to my mom and she got angry with it so she gave it back to me and told me to get the fuck out of her room so i went to the mall and got on the airplane and drove to japan and then i biked to south korea over the sea and i dropped it on my way to south korea. so it's in the ocean between japan and south korea. i mean, feel free to look in the ocean. i hope you don't drown. *silently wishing for them to drown* *smiles all inocently* number two - my pet dragon at it. number three - i got free tickets to a bts concert with backstage tickets and i needed the paper to make a poster for bts. number four - i cried and got it all wet and then my little brother got hungry so i fed my brother my homework for dinner because i was depression and did not feel like cooking. number five - wait- we had homework? oh my god, was that what i used to pick up my unicorn's shit? i'm so sorry! number six - i lost it in zamunda. you don't know what zamunda is? oh my god, it's in africa. what type of social studies teacher are you? what the fuck do you mean, 'why was i in zamunda'? i was studying, idiot. number seven - i was sick and i used the paper as toilet paper. don't ask me what sickness i had, you icky nasty, oh my god! you disgust me. okay, lemme stop.
12. write a funny short story in which the main character is your alter ego/you.438Please respect copyright.PENANA41KfI7G93e
funny? mm. i'll see if i can do it. so first here is my ego or aura, whatever. i'm nice, sweet, funny, "pretty", adorable, friendly, sometimes ghetto especially when i'm mad and i seem very social but i really don't like people. so, my alter ego would be someone who absolutely the opposite except for the fact that i'd still be funny and ghetto. story (btw this'll be like when i first moved here so jazzy won't be in this): i walk down the stairs of my new group home. all the heads turn towards me. the staff, bunny, gorgeous and kitkat. they all look at me, wide-eyed. i sigh, heavily and walk towards them, not wanting to get to know them. "hi." gorgeous says. "wassup." i say, sliding my hoodie on. omg, i give up. i can't do this lmao.
13. have you ever tried to use your own sense of humor to impress someone? write about whether or not your jokes worked their magic.438Please respect copyright.PENANAGkLsWMETXu
i mean, yeah, mate. how do you think i have emmi? she likes me because i'm pretty, funny, loud/energetic, and i kind of don't care what people think about me.
14. think about an inside joke that you share with a friend or family member. how did that inside joke come to be? 438Please respect copyright.PENANA18uTD9Vqf1
bet~! me and bunny were just doing it. free real estate. i walked up to her one day and slid my hand down her arm and said that in a weird/seductive way and ever since then, it's been a thing. we were just trying to explain it to her boyfriend, lion. and yesterday, we were watching a movie and the thingy said in a british accent, 'and i'm greedy with the soup.' so now, that's a thing. we have too many inside jokes. i make too many jokes.
~~
i guess i'm doing those question things again. emmi looks sexy today, holy shet. anyways--
~~
full name? - lady leilani waterton of dogde charger.438Please respect copyright.PENANAaUd6CZGyQo
girl bestie? - coco <3438Please respect copyright.PENANA4jiErE82UT
boy bestie? - idek anymore. i need a boy bestie.438Please respect copyright.PENANAJrOHsjEdC2
age? - seven years old.438Please respect copyright.PENANA4a8ReZtppk
last person i texted? - idfk.438Please respect copyright.PENANAZPPReNY6s4
last person i called? - probably my little brother.438Please respect copyright.PENANAcJPm6JwQy9
current crush? - my girlfriend, emmi, tf?438Please respect copyright.PENANAvpCsqna97K
random fact? - i like food.438Please respect copyright.PENANAAJOwZLEEEb
single or taken? - big, fat taken.438Please respect copyright.PENANAYRsC7cLOAM
favourite quote? - if it delicious, it's zero calories. said by wwh.438Please respect copyright.PENANAwjGWfvbrlY
first kiss? - bitch wtf?438Please respect copyright.PENANAmFzqRRMrCR
ever smoked? - nope.438Please respect copyright.PENANAcTSYRGlRJg
ever done drugs? - nope~438Please respect copyright.PENANAmDMvaGpTa4
ever been drunk? - i don't drink.438Please respect copyright.PENANAhiyKV16a9H
longest relationship? - five and a half months.438Please respect copyright.PENANA5m6B8nrCl8
pet peeve? - my little brother. his entire existent. but i still love him.438Please respect copyright.PENANAFkDmku7HZL
eye colour? - brown. my little brother's eyes are really pretty.438Please respect copyright.PENANAvEhDpph7mb
birthday? - 1930.01.01-- nah, i'm playing but no one needs to know my birthday.438Please respect copyright.PENANAjindvH9RxR
obsession? - kpop.438Please respect copyright.PENANAlrJ11xY5wI
do you give second chances? - that depends.438Please respect copyright.PENANAnmfNSJPRRj
play any sports? - no, bitch. the hell do i look like?438Please respect copyright.PENANAcWrIOj0HiO
dream job? - kpop idol or just a singer in general.438Please respect copyright.PENANA1hxtiKgZHH
day or night? - idk.438Please respect copyright.PENANAPPLuZTQgBO
your idea of a perfec date? - idk.438Please respect copyright.PENANAWeggrSXhru
sing in the shower? - yes, motherfucker. i throw whole ass concerts in the shower.438Please respect copyright.PENANAcWRTNZUUM9
favourite colour(s)? - purple and black.438Please respect copyright.PENANAowOvRqi8lT
any tattoos? - nope. i'm lame.438Please respect copyright.PENANAOfOjl7YmfD
any peircings? - yes, in my ears.438Please respect copyright.PENANAtjFAi1beSz
favourite movie(s)? - idk.438Please respect copyright.PENANAcGvqLkvQRX
current mood? - bored and tired.438Please respect copyright.PENANA3PLfBD35TO
jealous of? - a lot of things.438Please respect copyright.PENANAVviFHMmSV6
place you want to visit? - south korea and cambodia.438Please respect copyright.PENANAlGJxUJ4RoX
pets? - two dogs.438Please respect copyright.PENANAPnY7RRXb3Y
last song you listened to? - spring day and currently listening to crystal snow and trying not to cry. so far succesful in not crying and the song is ending.438Please respect copyright.PENANAakaB7dUhUm
favourite number? - seven.438Please respect copyright.PENANA1yBiP4GKl2
nicknames? - vanilla, alex, suga, steph.438Please respect copyright.PENANANI5UAnxpU5
siblings? - 5 older sisters and 2 brothers.438Please respect copyright.PENANAbYzBqNLfVk
afraid of the dark? - yes.438Please respect copyright.PENANAS32KX7ppww
one wish? - to be happy for real.438Please respect copyright.PENANAW0wQYw6bF1
something you want to do!? - live life. vibe, you know?438Please respect copyright.PENANAJLELUyWA9k
~438Please respect copyright.PENANAQqQEE4LZlU
full name? - mind your fucking business, damn.438Please respect copyright.PENANAJ47P43ccG8
age? - i'm still seven years old.438Please respect copyright.PENANAW3L6Ob3DSu
idols? - bts, stray kids, blackpink, kamla harris, etc.438Please respect copyright.PENANA8SpJrNuEsG
something you hate about yourself? - my body.438Please respect copyright.PENANAWyDEA2dmIJ
something you like about yourself? - idk.438Please respect copyright.PENANAhL5y8KIigv
someone you hate? - jason derulo and donald trump.438Please respect copyright.PENANAOE5ac8lcvT
favourite band? - bts.438Please respect copyright.PENANALwLJD9XIx3
say 'sexy' what do you think of? - that time when stray kids was still nine members and they were roleplaying. felix was a grand father and he has this old man voice and it was still sexy but funny. but that's not it. he said sexy instead of saekshi, i guess and woojin corrected him and felix kept saying saekshi over and over. oh, i also think of bts and just-- agh!438Please respect copyright.PENANAYfdY7ByPUH
ever had a boyfriend/girlfriend? - no, of course not.438Please respect copyright.PENANAe6olASAQRZ
where do you want to be right now? - idk. south korea.438Please respect copyright.PENANAehbPwmctr8
girl crush? - emmi.438Please respect copyright.PENANAG28ho5cRmA
boy crush? - bts. plural, bitch.438Please respect copyright.PENANA6FSpAjlyyK
an embarrassing memory? - look at this top ^438Please respect copyright.PENANA2TT4g5Go6S
talents? - singing.438Please respect copyright.PENANAUtCjjScH0h
soemone i miss? - my step-mom.438Please respect copyright.PENANA89BVzXzFZv
someone i love? - emmi.438Please respect copyright.PENANAgTW72drNr7
my future goals? - idk. graduate school. succeed in life, i guess.438Please respect copyright.PENANAurn4Bl5gnq
a confession? - i am not ninety-one years old.438Please respect copyright.PENANAHP9R6Q0Uko
something i'm addicted to? - love and affection even though i don't get a lot of them. oh, also, drugs! yeah, no. i'm playing.438Please respect copyright.PENANAkBqvAldQo6
favourite animal? - dogs.438Please respect copyright.PENANACnNMyyk53F
favourite tv couples? - weiyoung and touba jun. minde and di. jin-wook and yu-mi. spongebob and sandy. probably more but i don't feel like going through them all. 438Please respect copyright.PENANAHO6XlzKVrw
ships? - namjin, jikook, taekook, sope.438Please respect copyright.PENANAu4KIq708YB
worst movie you've ever saw? - i don't remember what it was called but it was just terrible. i was so cunfused.438Please respect copyright.PENANAmYuZOl8Nzs
what's your biggest wish? - to be a singer.438Please respect copyright.PENANAnpTGrD9rce
bad habits? - hitting people out of affection. being sarcastic.438Please respect copyright.PENANAqVUbB9oOvh
food you hate? - pineapple pizza, school luch fried chicken because that chicken be fake and disgusting. caviar. 438Please respect copyright.PENANAVPuQuERK8V
hair colour? - brown. i'm ugly as fuck so when i say i feel sexy, ignore that shit.438Please respect copyright.PENANAK7Wl2b6NS0
favourite kind of ice cream? - cookies & cream and chocolate.438Please respect copyright.PENANARjIcaiQPxw
~438Please respect copyright.PENANAoyF9CT0dIV
gender? - oppa attack helicopter and/or female.438Please respect copyright.PENANAnr7vM6sPgo
country? - i don't live on earth. 438Please respect copyright.PENANAVN686bKZlC
languages you speak? - lunarian, trigedasleng, english, tiny korean, sorta french, kinda spanish.438Please respect copyright.PENANAydfjGAeyVE
last lie you told? - that i'm pretty.438Please respect copyright.PENANAWhb5bA28q1
favourite subject in school? - english language arts.438Please respect copyright.PENANAQe0DXD5TpQ
most expensive item you own? - a pair of vans.438Please respect copyright.PENANA4O8GnAZVat
country with your favourite accent? - australia.438Please respect copyright.PENANA2ps510kcU5
do you have any children? - i was about to answer like, bitch wtf, no. but i do. li minde, touba jun, touba yu, cheng de, li weiyoung, jun tao, bai zhi, jungkook, jennie, lisa, ni-ki, all of txt, jasper from the 100, etc. i have a lot of kids.438Please respect copyright.PENANA15Qr9glLbO
dog or cat person? - both.438Please respect copyright.PENANAKI91LpiHh2
first kiss? if so, what age? - yes. thirteen years old.438Please respect copyright.PENANAJi8odu9XdS
do you live in a house or apartment? - nosy, i declare. i live in a house. damn.438Please respect copyright.PENANAVA0xnj4NFu
do you belive in God? - idk.438Please respect copyright.PENANA2l2l0LW8Lv
single or taken? - taken.438Please respect copyright.PENANALjSqt6Csmg
favourite body part of the opposite gender? - well, damn. heh heh. nah, perverts. torso and hands, omg. *dies*438Please respect copyright.PENANAYU3oKWxz8L
birthday year? - 1930.438Please respect copyright.PENANAgEQtFXWDOD
celebrity crush? - holy fuck, dude. i have a lot.438Please respect copyright.PENANAOUjLfntVL6
age? - what's that?438Please respect copyright.PENANAzYV3305Pp6
enthinicity? - african american.438Please respect copyright.PENANAXd4uQDPCJA
tea or coffee? - neither.438Please respect copyright.PENANANsd8nab8dn
random skill you have? - i can make people smile.438Please respect copyright.PENANAcoIHx6T2OA
prefer hugs or kisses? - i mean, both. *slow motion walks looking stupid as fuck*438Please respect copyright.PENANAEwzq519e40
favourite food? - ice cream.438Please respect copyright.PENANANRTfTerA03
last person you saw naked? - myself, you fucking icky nasty. 438Please respect copyright.PENANAzyUN7Oc5CK
shared nudes? - damn, people are nosy but yes.438Please respect copyright.PENANAjF8j7MxC5q
eye colour? - the rainbow. get on my level.438Please respect copyright.PENANALawb9l36qR
favourite soda? - sprite.438Please respect copyright.PENANApUrSLJcvvF
biggest pet peeve? - people being people.438Please respect copyright.PENANAoRmKVpGEmE
can you swim? - yes, wtf?438Please respect copyright.PENANAz5iM8TaX6i
favourite song at the moment? - 19 by stray kids but that could change every 2 seconds. honestly i don't think i have a favourite song.438Please respect copyright.PENANAbdxn6OuIcW
do you watch porn? - no, but i have with my cousin and her friends because we wanted to see the tony lopez leaked video so we searched porn hub. one thing went to another and we ended up seeing an apparent james charles leaked sex tape and then my cousin and her friend sat there and watched a bondage for like an hour while me and her other friend decided to cleanse our eyes with bleach and protect our assholes.438Please respect copyright.PENANAXQSezCz5r4
virgin? - yes, omg. nasty.438Please respect copyright.PENANAAEoRw8nMRC
favourite social media platform(s) - twitter, weverse, snapchat.438Please respect copyright.PENANAUygTKmar3L
colour of your current bed sheets? - weird question but, uhm, they're grey...yep *nodding*438Please respect copyright.PENANAoThNMoNL1m
apple or andriod? - apple.438Please respect copyright.PENANAouwN36pxwN
best dessert? - mochi.438Please respect copyright.PENANA3SOZXU5AAi
~438Please respect copyright.PENANAYlhQ3JyWAW
have you ever:438Please respect copyright.PENANA5OzKC4h321
1. skipped class? - yes.438Please respect copyright.PENANAil3GVJw24A
2. done drugs? - no.438Please respect copyright.PENANACmOxdQ7d5a
3. self-harmed? - yes.438Please respect copyright.PENANALE0ge0XMqn
4. drank? - no.438Please respect copyright.PENANAToXvYx9grv
5. shoplifted? - yes.438Please respect copyright.PENANAVkfSV12qld
6. gotten a tattoo? - no.438Please respect copyright.PENANA8Zzt5DP4F3
7. broken up with someone? - yes.438Please respect copyright.PENANAr7yQxc15xM
what's your favourite:438Please respect copyright.PENANA0Y4zqmvreX
8. show? - the princess weiyoung.438Please respect copyright.PENANAAoRWm0mCyK
9. movie? - break the silence.438Please respect copyright.PENANArOU2Es6zvv
10. song? - idk anymore and i just answered that, like, 5 minutes ago, omg.438Please respect copyright.PENANAGmEdiD5obs
11. artist? - bts.438Please respect copyright.PENANAiOUcYlgFgv
12. singer or band? - bts.438Please respect copyright.PENANARDBcCqQ8vf
13. memory? - idk.438Please respect copyright.PENANAbR5hLo826X
14. book? - the cruel prince.438Please respect copyright.PENANACRMNGZ7Dw9
this or that:438Please respect copyright.PENANAnCBBVTbqP2
15. invisibility or ability to fly? - fly.438Please respect copyright.PENANAxxiBirLmH0
16. cookies or cake? - cookies.438Please respect copyright.PENANAJHSTDf1ZKY
17. twitter or facebook? - twitter.438Please respect copyright.PENANA4838Dkm2oi
18. movies or books? - idk.438Please respect copyright.PENANA26Jzxtajtv
19. coke or sprite? - sprite.438Please respect copyright.PENANAI57pK27h1r
20. blind of deaf? - blind.438Please respect copyright.PENANAQpkKb07a9J
21. tea or coffee? - neither.438Please respect copyright.PENANAlF6mvqfeNZ
what's your:438Please respect copyright.PENANAqHMW4PURzy
22. age? - ninety-one.438Please respect copyright.PENANAFNPGfHw0Oy
23. zodiac sign? - virgo/libra cusp.438Please respect copyright.PENANAYLLX08dFhT
24. height? - 4'11.438Please respect copyright.PENANAUecxLR8Ke0
25. sexual orientation? - bisexual.438Please respect copyright.PENANAzsUxhkEXjT
26. shoe size? - seven.438Please respect copyright.PENANAecOSKCmkO2
27. religion? - i'm not religious.438Please respect copyright.PENANAq7uYVoaFCV
28. longest relationship? - like, five months.438Please respect copyright.PENANAzY66iDIa0o
opinion on: 438Please respect copyright.PENANAuUAn7ezEtZ
29. gay rights? - i'm gay...438Please respect copyright.PENANADme7xP8SuF
30. second chances? - it depends.438Please respect copyright.PENANAKLOCBY4ObR
31. long distance relationships? - don't get hurt, baby.438Please respect copyright.PENANAOpUpx1IGGu
32. abortion? - ew.438Please respect copyright.PENANAGFXoShuqAu
33. a death penalty? - ew.438Please respect copyright.PENANA7H3rxW1rmj
34. marijuana? - i likes that.438Please respect copyright.PENANASYD4IBI2K0
35. love? - what's love?438Please respect copyright.PENANA8KBVmfvUmj
do you:438Please respect copyright.PENANATGh0LjmQwZ
36. belive in ghosts? - sorta kinda.438Please respect copyright.PENANAtXjwesLwAd
438Please respect copyright.PENANAhLwPCLZvSb
omg, bye. i'm tired of this.
- Alex <3438Please respect copyright.PENANApxUImUxTBp