
hewo~! okay, anyways. idk what i'm doing but have fun reading, i guess.
1. recall your most embarrassing memory467Please respect copyright.PENANATjwQen1ZtR
okay. welp, this is going to be weird to write about. okay, so, i was in 5th grade and i had the audacity to sign up for the talent show. so, i signed up and i went to rehearsal, right? i cried in front everyone at rehearsal. then the next night, we had a night where all the kids in the talent show performed in front everyone's parents. what did i do? i cried. again. then the next day, we peformed again but it was in front of the entire school, including my crush. mind you, i was wearing this ugly dress and i thought i was cute. then we were back in that era where we thought the orange justice dance was the shit. so, muy friend was shy and she was dancing so i went out onto the stage with her and danced sicne for some reason, i knew the entire dance to the entire song..? then my turn came and i had to put the ugly dress on, i went on stage and started to sing rise up by andra day and what did i do, once again? i fucking cried. yep. in front of my crush and everything. life sucks, mate.
2. think about the last time that you laughed until you cried. 467Please respect copyright.PENANAwG4c5y9Jp0
that had to be like yesterday. i think i laughed at something bunny said and then started crying because it was so funny. maybe it wasn't yesterday but it was damn near last week or something. eh, idgaf.
3. write a story about what would happen if your day went in reverse. hint: the story would begin when you were in your pajamas and ready for bed.467Please respect copyright.PENANAoNbG4L5Ezi
*acting like a vlogger on youtube from 2016* hi, guys. so, i'm in bed right now. i can't get back up for a few more hours because of my schedule. *a few hours earlier..?* okay, hi. i'm in the bathroom right now taking my clothes off and using the shower. *after shower* i'm putting my clothes back on now. hold on, ms. shi! i'm getting undressed. --- omfg, i can't do this. it's too weird.
5. what was the best joke that you heard during the last week? what made that joke so funny to you?467Please respect copyright.PENANAgCJpDJHiKB
the funniest joke to me in the past week was said on saturday when we were at barnes & noble. lovely, bunny and i were sitting in the little kids section, reading when out of no where lovely said, 'are you eleven protons because you're sodium fine.' and i stared at her. then i realized what she said and i started cackling.
6. make a list of your favorite puns.467Please respect copyright.PENANAXtaZ707T1q
i might seem lame right now but i don't pay attention to puns...
7. write a movie review about the funniest movie that you have ever seen.467Please respect copyright.PENANALMnvbQ18z4
*acting like a famous journalist* hello, my name is alex ugliana. today i am going to write a movie review about the movie- i give up. i'm not good at explaining things without spoiling it.
8. pretend that you are going to be performing a stand-up comedy act for your friends and family members. write a draft of what your act might sound like.467Please respect copyright.PENANAD0deTimEpx
hehe, okay. *clears throat and gets accent ready* *using "country" accent* hey there, y'all! my name is alex and i'm here tahday tah tell yeh fellers about the trump family! i believe thet man, donald trump, was a good president. and that's not jest becuz i'm caucasian and african amurican. i swear tah yer, he was a good man in my eyes. omfg, i give up. wtf am i writing? *yeets self into dumpster*
9. consider something that you are most scared of, and then write a story about a character encountering that fear. make sure the character has a reaction to their fear that is so exaggerated it becomes funny.467Please respect copyright.PENANAU8TVHcmD9b
okay, lemme try this. i'm scared of the dark. lemma alone. omg. anyways-- genevieve walked into her home late at night. "i knew i shouldn't have gone to that stupid 'get together'." she groans --bitch wtf--. her house was pitch black. she couldn't see anything as she took off her shoes. she tried to flip on a light switch. it didn't work. she tried over and over again. "holy fuck, did i pay the light bill?" she said --shoulda never sucked dick for free, genevieve. omg, i'm going to hell-- she digs in her pocket for her phone. she turned on the flashlight. she walked through her house, heart beating like crazy, mind running at what could've caused her lights not to work. she walks past the couch and the corner of the couch grazes her thigh. she screams bloody murder. "oh my fucking god!" she screams and runs through her house like a little bitch. she runs into the kitchen counter. "ouch!" she yells. she goes for another light switch. it doesn't work either. she screams even louder. she runs to her room and flips on the light. she breathes a heavy sigh, seeing the darkness disappear from the light. --you know what? i declare gore!-- then a blade stabs into her neck. she gasps and chokes up blood, holding her neck. she bleeds all over her carpets. thoughts are running through her mind. am i dying? eh, i don't care. oh my fucking god! there is blood on my carpets! wait- who stabbed me? she turns around and there is the dark behind her. she falls to the ground and dies. you know, i liked where that went. morbid as fuck but who gives a shit. i liked it. i'm weird. anyways-- NEXT~!
10. how would you describe your own sense of humor?467Please respect copyright.PENANAFxOhzmHHZN
i would descibe my sense of humor to be kind of morbid, kind of crazy, not really that funny but somehow funny to other people. i think i'm a crackhead that doesn't do crack....make sense? yeah? okay, bye.
11. write a list of funny excuses that you could use to get out of doing your homework.467Please respect copyright.PENANAFVpirIxzrn
okay, bet. number one - so what had happened was, i didn't really know what to do so i gave it to my mom and she got angry with it so she gave it back to me and told me to get the fuck out of her room so i went to the mall and got on the airplane and drove to japan and then i biked to south korea over the sea and i dropped it on my way to south korea. so it's in the ocean between japan and south korea. i mean, feel free to look in the ocean. i hope you don't drown. *silently wishing for them to drown* *smiles all inocently* number two - my pet dragon at it. number three - i got free tickets to a bts concert with backstage tickets and i needed the paper to make a poster for bts. number four - i cried and got it all wet and then my little brother got hungry so i fed my brother my homework for dinner because i was depression and did not feel like cooking. number five - wait- we had homework? oh my god, was that what i used to pick up my unicorn's shit? i'm so sorry! number six - i lost it in zamunda. you don't know what zamunda is? oh my god, it's in africa. what type of social studies teacher are you? what the fuck do you mean, 'why was i in zamunda'? i was studying, idiot. number seven - i was sick and i used the paper as toilet paper. don't ask me what sickness i had, you icky nasty, oh my god! you disgust me. okay, lemme stop.
12. write a funny short story in which the main character is your alter ego/you.467Please respect copyright.PENANAxnvLc7yadk
funny? mm. i'll see if i can do it. so first here is my ego or aura, whatever. i'm nice, sweet, funny, "pretty", adorable, friendly, sometimes ghetto especially when i'm mad and i seem very social but i really don't like people. so, my alter ego would be someone who absolutely the opposite except for the fact that i'd still be funny and ghetto. story (btw this'll be like when i first moved here so jazzy won't be in this): i walk down the stairs of my new group home. all the heads turn towards me. the staff, bunny, gorgeous and kitkat. they all look at me, wide-eyed. i sigh, heavily and walk towards them, not wanting to get to know them. "hi." gorgeous says. "wassup." i say, sliding my hoodie on. omg, i give up. i can't do this lmao.
13. have you ever tried to use your own sense of humor to impress someone? write about whether or not your jokes worked their magic.467Please respect copyright.PENANAcH6yzKRx4L
i mean, yeah, mate. how do you think i have emmi? she likes me because i'm pretty, funny, loud/energetic, and i kind of don't care what people think about me.
14. think about an inside joke that you share with a friend or family member. how did that inside joke come to be? 467Please respect copyright.PENANAdaLWsPCkRC
bet~! me and bunny were just doing it. free real estate. i walked up to her one day and slid my hand down her arm and said that in a weird/seductive way and ever since then, it's been a thing. we were just trying to explain it to her boyfriend, lion. and yesterday, we were watching a movie and the thingy said in a british accent, 'and i'm greedy with the soup.' so now, that's a thing. we have too many inside jokes. i make too many jokes.
~~
i guess i'm doing those question things again. emmi looks sexy today, holy shet. anyways--
~~
full name? - lady leilani waterton of dogde charger.467Please respect copyright.PENANA2GO79E1I67
girl bestie? - coco <3467Please respect copyright.PENANAK5eunac5W9
boy bestie? - idek anymore. i need a boy bestie.467Please respect copyright.PENANAv0g5FE9ka5
age? - seven years old.467Please respect copyright.PENANAmJY5kHdusr
last person i texted? - idfk.467Please respect copyright.PENANAOqbAihB9qw
last person i called? - probably my little brother.467Please respect copyright.PENANA5rixtNEsDL
current crush? - my girlfriend, emmi, tf?467Please respect copyright.PENANAwqJ7M4dzvv
random fact? - i like food.467Please respect copyright.PENANA7O499LiMcv
single or taken? - big, fat taken.467Please respect copyright.PENANAkLDqIGuMvy
favourite quote? - if it delicious, it's zero calories. said by wwh.467Please respect copyright.PENANAcwVDPpV2sZ
first kiss? - bitch wtf?467Please respect copyright.PENANA1KkwAXaxuk
ever smoked? - nope.467Please respect copyright.PENANA68ApDwtgqw
ever done drugs? - nope~467Please respect copyright.PENANApUH8I3QzV9
ever been drunk? - i don't drink.467Please respect copyright.PENANAYyNSAO97E4
longest relationship? - five and a half months.467Please respect copyright.PENANAz56FByqObg
pet peeve? - my little brother. his entire existent. but i still love him.467Please respect copyright.PENANAC4YLsA8ECN
eye colour? - brown. my little brother's eyes are really pretty.467Please respect copyright.PENANAQTnRwLeaKs
birthday? - 1930.01.01-- nah, i'm playing but no one needs to know my birthday.467Please respect copyright.PENANAGfiRgZXK56
obsession? - kpop.467Please respect copyright.PENANAXMwL8lXhBW
do you give second chances? - that depends.467Please respect copyright.PENANAWhbxvuU4pi
play any sports? - no, bitch. the hell do i look like?467Please respect copyright.PENANAJGflMdBqYD
dream job? - kpop idol or just a singer in general.467Please respect copyright.PENANAYcYITg0X4d
day or night? - idk.467Please respect copyright.PENANAvQaabXIxVN
your idea of a perfec date? - idk.467Please respect copyright.PENANA5KQxaY6eUx
sing in the shower? - yes, motherfucker. i throw whole ass concerts in the shower.467Please respect copyright.PENANAYGDvIRF16y
favourite colour(s)? - purple and black.467Please respect copyright.PENANAG22RS4fEBl
any tattoos? - nope. i'm lame.467Please respect copyright.PENANAvhCmd0yML0
any peircings? - yes, in my ears.467Please respect copyright.PENANAy6QDxZrFtl
favourite movie(s)? - idk.467Please respect copyright.PENANAxKnPjAxV6P
current mood? - bored and tired.467Please respect copyright.PENANAWK3ZMuSLt8
jealous of? - a lot of things.467Please respect copyright.PENANAAIv92b6Gvg
place you want to visit? - south korea and cambodia.467Please respect copyright.PENANArfBr1BpCOP
pets? - two dogs.467Please respect copyright.PENANAvQj4kcTXTh
last song you listened to? - spring day and currently listening to crystal snow and trying not to cry. so far succesful in not crying and the song is ending.467Please respect copyright.PENANAbN4u8YfOyC
favourite number? - seven.467Please respect copyright.PENANAcdHuABmyXO
nicknames? - vanilla, alex, suga, steph.467Please respect copyright.PENANARWKpMPtxtL
siblings? - 5 older sisters and 2 brothers.467Please respect copyright.PENANAL5g5N6y4Eg
afraid of the dark? - yes.467Please respect copyright.PENANAhwiosTPG7C
one wish? - to be happy for real.467Please respect copyright.PENANAfXvXeD50VV
something you want to do!? - live life. vibe, you know?467Please respect copyright.PENANAqwMUzl2SGG
~467Please respect copyright.PENANAQVBJP4Nu4x
full name? - mind your fucking business, damn.467Please respect copyright.PENANAab2Jqrg3Uq
age? - i'm still seven years old.467Please respect copyright.PENANAAUXTW9JtFO
idols? - bts, stray kids, blackpink, kamla harris, etc.467Please respect copyright.PENANAwkoI1ODKe3
something you hate about yourself? - my body.467Please respect copyright.PENANAWyiKsDBf4i
something you like about yourself? - idk.467Please respect copyright.PENANAeTGfeoD027
someone you hate? - jason derulo and donald trump.467Please respect copyright.PENANAtiO0U7nDmH
favourite band? - bts.467Please respect copyright.PENANAhOwnjrwRGR
say 'sexy' what do you think of? - that time when stray kids was still nine members and they were roleplaying. felix was a grand father and he has this old man voice and it was still sexy but funny. but that's not it. he said sexy instead of saekshi, i guess and woojin corrected him and felix kept saying saekshi over and over. oh, i also think of bts and just-- agh!467Please respect copyright.PENANAwF7lxCbf2N
ever had a boyfriend/girlfriend? - no, of course not.467Please respect copyright.PENANA7yeoCej2Of
where do you want to be right now? - idk. south korea.467Please respect copyright.PENANAYFKYLvM7s6
girl crush? - emmi.467Please respect copyright.PENANAj5JmqaX0t2
boy crush? - bts. plural, bitch.467Please respect copyright.PENANAp6X4SfJSGo
an embarrassing memory? - look at this top ^467Please respect copyright.PENANAwSGHoIaTm9
talents? - singing.467Please respect copyright.PENANAbNVF2AflU5
soemone i miss? - my step-mom.467Please respect copyright.PENANA7sK2B1fiav
someone i love? - emmi.467Please respect copyright.PENANAkco7cFvyrR
my future goals? - idk. graduate school. succeed in life, i guess.467Please respect copyright.PENANARhxdOhquLr
a confession? - i am not ninety-one years old.467Please respect copyright.PENANAFj4f19A8fO
something i'm addicted to? - love and affection even though i don't get a lot of them. oh, also, drugs! yeah, no. i'm playing.467Please respect copyright.PENANAfleDdJ5zSm
favourite animal? - dogs.467Please respect copyright.PENANAJncNI44JxD
favourite tv couples? - weiyoung and touba jun. minde and di. jin-wook and yu-mi. spongebob and sandy. probably more but i don't feel like going through them all. 467Please respect copyright.PENANAlIqOX0pBWi
ships? - namjin, jikook, taekook, sope.467Please respect copyright.PENANADNWrb8pGuR
worst movie you've ever saw? - i don't remember what it was called but it was just terrible. i was so cunfused.467Please respect copyright.PENANAuxmtpiMSGN
what's your biggest wish? - to be a singer.467Please respect copyright.PENANAcmXTjjqHuJ
bad habits? - hitting people out of affection. being sarcastic.467Please respect copyright.PENANAOPiCMIl4yW
food you hate? - pineapple pizza, school luch fried chicken because that chicken be fake and disgusting. caviar. 467Please respect copyright.PENANADvaBfsH9Ot
hair colour? - brown. i'm ugly as fuck so when i say i feel sexy, ignore that shit.467Please respect copyright.PENANASQO5ny18VR
favourite kind of ice cream? - cookies & cream and chocolate.467Please respect copyright.PENANA1jss5vhii8
~467Please respect copyright.PENANATgEM01eRIz
gender? - oppa attack helicopter and/or female.467Please respect copyright.PENANAtXPd9TUN2O
country? - i don't live on earth. 467Please respect copyright.PENANA78s8JzOfVh
languages you speak? - lunarian, trigedasleng, english, tiny korean, sorta french, kinda spanish.467Please respect copyright.PENANAiv9nRXGt5O
last lie you told? - that i'm pretty.467Please respect copyright.PENANA0kNMvJUTPx
favourite subject in school? - english language arts.467Please respect copyright.PENANATlU9VmglKx
most expensive item you own? - a pair of vans.467Please respect copyright.PENANAo4zPxOv4Lb
country with your favourite accent? - australia.467Please respect copyright.PENANARVVLZT5874
do you have any children? - i was about to answer like, bitch wtf, no. but i do. li minde, touba jun, touba yu, cheng de, li weiyoung, jun tao, bai zhi, jungkook, jennie, lisa, ni-ki, all of txt, jasper from the 100, etc. i have a lot of kids.467Please respect copyright.PENANAxF8sD5sSR9
dog or cat person? - both.467Please respect copyright.PENANANlM1X7Z1Sw
first kiss? if so, what age? - yes. thirteen years old.467Please respect copyright.PENANAepI9fDsCDm
do you live in a house or apartment? - nosy, i declare. i live in a house. damn.467Please respect copyright.PENANATv150gFims
do you belive in God? - idk.467Please respect copyright.PENANA3rgAkpndXd
single or taken? - taken.467Please respect copyright.PENANAOS4OjEU0ag
favourite body part of the opposite gender? - well, damn. heh heh. nah, perverts. torso and hands, omg. *dies*467Please respect copyright.PENANAaixlgs4RQT
birthday year? - 1930.467Please respect copyright.PENANAKWK4wdxJRf
celebrity crush? - holy fuck, dude. i have a lot.467Please respect copyright.PENANA6iDScBZ1BQ
age? - what's that?467Please respect copyright.PENANAqqiYMirahf
enthinicity? - african american.467Please respect copyright.PENANAb9QucBRP1t
tea or coffee? - neither.467Please respect copyright.PENANAlHBcahJOzU
random skill you have? - i can make people smile.467Please respect copyright.PENANAKBARSk86lp
prefer hugs or kisses? - i mean, both. *slow motion walks looking stupid as fuck*467Please respect copyright.PENANAFknN4UKHH3
favourite food? - ice cream.467Please respect copyright.PENANA6tLEOpHRr7
last person you saw naked? - myself, you fucking icky nasty. 467Please respect copyright.PENANAzHpgkWnmxy
shared nudes? - damn, people are nosy but yes.467Please respect copyright.PENANA7B4oE5uQdb
eye colour? - the rainbow. get on my level.467Please respect copyright.PENANAajMuQQpNv1
favourite soda? - sprite.467Please respect copyright.PENANAxDTogLwagp
biggest pet peeve? - people being people.467Please respect copyright.PENANAWN7CX6yz7x
can you swim? - yes, wtf?467Please respect copyright.PENANAXudDYHcmxF
favourite song at the moment? - 19 by stray kids but that could change every 2 seconds. honestly i don't think i have a favourite song.467Please respect copyright.PENANAobIG4XhE1r
do you watch porn? - no, but i have with my cousin and her friends because we wanted to see the tony lopez leaked video so we searched porn hub. one thing went to another and we ended up seeing an apparent james charles leaked sex tape and then my cousin and her friend sat there and watched a bondage for like an hour while me and her other friend decided to cleanse our eyes with bleach and protect our assholes.467Please respect copyright.PENANAUDAZvemjQ6
virgin? - yes, omg. nasty.467Please respect copyright.PENANACTXDcoyUxk
favourite social media platform(s) - twitter, weverse, snapchat.467Please respect copyright.PENANAyi1UygpeFY
colour of your current bed sheets? - weird question but, uhm, they're grey...yep *nodding*467Please respect copyright.PENANADXSuqQ2EqL
apple or andriod? - apple.467Please respect copyright.PENANAKdjJzZHGpO
best dessert? - mochi.467Please respect copyright.PENANAsKUJ0E1eTM
~467Please respect copyright.PENANAbgKatOomOp
have you ever:467Please respect copyright.PENANAieE5m7zXbi
1. skipped class? - yes.467Please respect copyright.PENANAZ4bJq8x5nN
2. done drugs? - no.467Please respect copyright.PENANAW4uANYYfr5
3. self-harmed? - yes.467Please respect copyright.PENANAp6v1Db6pux
4. drank? - no.467Please respect copyright.PENANAAdQPCYhPfM
5. shoplifted? - yes.467Please respect copyright.PENANAjJNgRV7p1x
6. gotten a tattoo? - no.467Please respect copyright.PENANACiZl84Vem3
7. broken up with someone? - yes.467Please respect copyright.PENANAgOxgAfvOZv
what's your favourite:467Please respect copyright.PENANAo3jot6AhKJ
8. show? - the princess weiyoung.467Please respect copyright.PENANAvh04pKOuvX
9. movie? - break the silence.467Please respect copyright.PENANA1WGAUx3ZsV
10. song? - idk anymore and i just answered that, like, 5 minutes ago, omg.467Please respect copyright.PENANADWduqbLtYD
11. artist? - bts.467Please respect copyright.PENANA6N89DMKrTG
12. singer or band? - bts.467Please respect copyright.PENANAPHAkQgFPMU
13. memory? - idk.467Please respect copyright.PENANAYKS3sUC4DU
14. book? - the cruel prince.467Please respect copyright.PENANAssWraP2m1t
this or that:467Please respect copyright.PENANABxGnEBKiFR
15. invisibility or ability to fly? - fly.467Please respect copyright.PENANASjzcD9Sbmu
16. cookies or cake? - cookies.467Please respect copyright.PENANAeQ6ANhz4sg
17. twitter or facebook? - twitter.467Please respect copyright.PENANAySLnjm4f7d
18. movies or books? - idk.467Please respect copyright.PENANAd0GVQhn8xP
19. coke or sprite? - sprite.467Please respect copyright.PENANAFK6T2TX6De
20. blind of deaf? - blind.467Please respect copyright.PENANAnSEcZ32O7j
21. tea or coffee? - neither.467Please respect copyright.PENANAKU1tnN3Jzr
what's your:467Please respect copyright.PENANAP7mi5KtmDK
22. age? - ninety-one.467Please respect copyright.PENANAMAQanBNHgJ
23. zodiac sign? - virgo/libra cusp.467Please respect copyright.PENANA0p67rt57AL
24. height? - 4'11.467Please respect copyright.PENANAC73td16nn9
25. sexual orientation? - bisexual.467Please respect copyright.PENANAaFbYei8U71
26. shoe size? - seven.467Please respect copyright.PENANAIUdqqD8cow
27. religion? - i'm not religious.467Please respect copyright.PENANA0Be5x0zxGY
28. longest relationship? - like, five months.467Please respect copyright.PENANAx6Wli2gG00
opinion on: 467Please respect copyright.PENANAQFopRhlwUi
29. gay rights? - i'm gay...467Please respect copyright.PENANAtahJzry9MN
30. second chances? - it depends.467Please respect copyright.PENANAlA5BWhngNl
31. long distance relationships? - don't get hurt, baby.467Please respect copyright.PENANAy3t9G4cSGw
32. abortion? - ew.467Please respect copyright.PENANAoJht8qD54R
33. a death penalty? - ew.467Please respect copyright.PENANAyiL4bOukDV
34. marijuana? - i likes that.467Please respect copyright.PENANALCZXmeStW7
35. love? - what's love?467Please respect copyright.PENANA3cs8Jyrael
do you:467Please respect copyright.PENANAQt6uLIjzGb
36. belive in ghosts? - sorta kinda.467Please respect copyright.PENANATfrBjlDJUH
467Please respect copyright.PENANA4mFzFW9ROQ
omg, bye. i'm tired of this.
- Alex <3467Please respect copyright.PENANAanwgddIbZr