A few weeks later, Muffins sat in his room, staring at the ceiling. He wished more than anything that he could be holding his son or daughter right now. But he couldn't. Because Lemonade had aborted their baby.
"Fuck" Muffins whispered to himself.
His phone rang. It was Strudel. Muffins immediately felt sick to his stomach. "Hello?" he answered.
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"Muffins? I haven't heard from you since we left the hotel room"
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"Yeah, uh, sorry, I've been super busy" Muffins said.
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"It's cool" Strudel said. "You wanna come over in a bit?"
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"Strudel, I'm not gay, okay?" Muffins said. "I was just super hammered that night and that shouldn't have happened. Luckily I don't remember most of it. I don't know if all the puking I did the next day was from the hangover or the thought of my dick in your mouth"
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"You- you didn't feel anything between us?" Strudel said sadly.
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"No, Strudel, I'm sorry" Muffins said. "I'm completely straight, I like vagina. I'm sorry if I led you on or something"
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"It's fine" Strudel sighed. "Maybe bisexuality isn't gonna work out for me. Maybe I should just stick to girls"
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"Strudel, you go for whoever you're attracted to" Muffins said.
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"That would be Pancake" Strudel sighed.
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"Strudel, you're gonna need to get over her someday, man." Muffins said. "She's engaged"
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"Yeah, I know. I'll always love her though" Strudel sighed again.
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A few days later, Ziggy walked out to his truck.
Lemonade, who lived next door, stopped him. She had just received an anonymous text telling her to get tested for STDs.
"Hey!" she called out. "You're back? I've missed you!"
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"I'm sorry... I don't believe we've met" Ziggy said.
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"I've lived next door to your house for like, ever" Lemonade giggled. "I've always thought you were cute, Ziggy"
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"How do you know my name?" Ziggy asked.
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"I know a lot about you" Lemonade said smugly. "You're a Taurus and you can drive a stick shift"
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"Um, wow" Ziggy said. "I'm, uh, a bit creeped out, sorry"
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"Anyways, think you could give me a lesson on the stick shift?" Lemonade winked.
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"Um, sure" Ziggy said. "I'll take you to an empty parking lot"
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