Eli throws himself back in his chair, one hand to his head and the other limp across the chair’s arm. The box falls out of his grip and clatters on the wooden floor. His grandmother’s ring pops out of the box and skitters away from him. The diamonds taunt him in the moonlight.749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPpTYi73MxK
749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8oBlxJfCst
“We can’t do this,” Mari said gently, curling his hand over the ring.749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfq4fjCfZsu
749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRmrOf0MW48
The memory makes him shudder. Good thing he did it alone rather than in a crowded location as he was originally planning to.749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡI1qU1OSC1d
749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhrhgAZuIg7
“I love you,” he said.749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPZe5AdJV4h
749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgraTiWw72o
“I love you too.” She stared at the flame of the candle between them. “But…how can we get married when you aren’t old enough to drink at your own bachelor party? Are we supposed to pop open a bottle of apple cider?”749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVR2GIca7ss
749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiTgkU3gsZR
“I didn’t know drinking was that important to you,” he said stiffly, running his pinky along the rim of his water glass.749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRIZ1osst8K
749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFaIOiTZuzD
“It isn’t that,” Mari said. “It’s what being able to drink represents.”749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyP54QlHom7
749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiWZhhkplnx
“And what’s that?” he asked, knowing he wasn’t helping his case by sounding like a petulant child.749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnbIJdP4h1V
749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyRE3VbVLbg
“That you’re an adult,” she said, reaching across the table to put a hand to his cheek. “Which you aren’t yet.”749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgMI7pQUcYi
749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEXPHiWqSIf
“That’s not what you said last night,” Eli muttered.749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfqrlLj3ImR
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She shot him a look and her smile melted away. “I love you, Eli. You know that. But we can’t get married. At the very least, we can’t get married right now.”749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq90zmR8sfv
749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpyTGKiUhWt
The table is still set for dinner, even though Mari has long since left. The ice in her water glass has melted. He can still smell the candle wax.749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdEnPgyqSys
749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6ktsFQrwHW
Mari wanted to go to the Epik High concert even more than Eli did. Or rather, Eli wanted to go but had to accept the fact that he couldn’t afford to do everything while studying full-time and working part-time at the university bookstore. But Mari wanted to do everything.749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ40Z0HfiPRr
749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzUmGBxSEPQ
“I can’t go to the concert,” he told her.749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡl9y1d3OHIh
749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfDaZsEBG2B
She bought him a ticket anyway, telling him, “It isn’t a big deal.”749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwsDgi3G6eG
749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeTLrj8WXnh
It’s always been like that. She casually buys him a ticket to something and doesn’t think twice about it. For him, however, each event she pays for becomes a brick on his back. He can’t imagine she’s as fine with it as she seems to be.749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaAU6jHkekz
749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyjPKwp6I5K
He has never been sure what bothers him more—being a burden on her or the fact that she isn’t honest about how she feels, that she pretends it’s okay that she has to keep paying for him.749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1ZTsZOdHBL
749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAxJXjgsGWS
Eli gets up, leaving the ring where it is on the floor and goes out to the balcony. He leans his forearms on the cold metal railing and leans forward, staring up at the sky. His favorite thing about living in a college town is that he can actually see the stars—especially since his apartment is at the top of the hill.749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAdNcqL4E20
749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb1REDGbHPC
He drops his gaze down toward the school and can even see Bell Hall, the building with the lab where Mari works. There are some lights on, although he’s fairly certain Mari isn’t there right now. She’s probably soaking in a hot bath—probably reading to calm her nerves after rejecting Eli’s proposal.749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB2xyTfsrHs
749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLbygEr0ZYZ
He grips the railing and leans back, eyes turned upward again. The night breeze pushes his hair off his forehead.749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3A8HaMahD7
749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡL5va8inVbi
He went to the lab with her once, but only once. Mari had needed to stop by and start an experiment before they headed out on a date. He had trailed in after her, wanting to see what she did and just wanting to be in her presence.749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEPDcvkGist
749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1pQQuu4QzJ
One of her coworkers stopped by to talk to her and glanced at Eli questioningly.749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9I1L1vCFhB
749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYkodrz1HgJ
“Alan, this is my boyfriend, Eli,” Mari said.749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡowVJUQxhMX
749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRBpi3pRbVg
“So, Eli, what do you do?” Alan said as they shook hands.749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1fVlzAilou
749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxeqHFzhyTq
“Are you really going to pester my boyfriend right now?” Mari said, taking Eli’s arm and tried to pull him away.749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡs1y20lvEvz
749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfrzUjKxz3D
“Pester him? I’m just trying to be polite,” Alan said. “Is his job top secret or something?”749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5xMRuqjKst
749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHO4e52Rqj1
Mari’s lips were pressed together. Clearly she had never told her coworkers she’d met her boyfriend while she was a graduate student T.A. for his undergrad biochem class.749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZRnrk7tZa7
749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUezMTV7yDG
“I’m a student,” Eli said, suddenly wanting to leave the lab and head out to their movie.749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwQzEV0FJ0Y
749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡk6Wf6Qj7Uo
“PhD? What do you study?” Alan said.749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkXdJoL3wgw
749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡadWlQz02S7
“No, not a PhD student,” Eli said, his neck and cheeks starting to heat up. He couldn’t meet Mari’s gaze.749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrqkzShg8wc
749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlJkbHiYKZ2
“Oh, Master’s then?” 749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8LjYT5hGdK
749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡopOjUiX4yL
“Actually, I’m an undergrad,” Eli said.749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXWoimwTiC1
749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqbPJNjyjoU
“Oh.” Alan looked at Mari and then back at Eli. “Well, it was good to meet you, man.”749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNCBLRABffr
749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeNdzyfXpFF
Eli followed Mari in silence. He could feel something like embarrassment or shame rising off of her, but she turned around and placed a hand on his forearm, forcing a gentle smile.749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfyKpiZ3hLe
749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHUAP8vnqGs
“Don’t worry about it,” she said. “This is just because of your age. One day, you’ll catch up to me—maybe even pass me—and it won’t matter. We’ll forget there was ever a time like this.”749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡd1weIKVXGL
749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtCu1T6aHYT
Eli sighs. Crickets chirp in time with the twinkling of the stars. As he stares up absently, a giant meteor falls. He watches it streak across the sky, getting brighter and brighter and brighter until the blazing light fills the sky, fills his vision, fills his mind.749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyu3c7eW1AK
749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrOXBIf8SS3
He blinks. He’s in the living room of an apartment. There are no lights on, and the time reads 2:57 a.m. on a digital clock with green numbers—just around the time he was standing outside. 749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlsmdPIkagv
749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1m7XjLvpow
He realizes with surprise that there’s something in his hand. It’s a piece of a rock. He would think it’s a dream, but the rock smells like metal and fire. It’s warm. Eli brings it to his face. 749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡslzv2UDeBI
749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh80ERsRaqj
He doesn’t see how it’s possible, but he wonders if it’s a part of a meteor—maybe the meteor he just saw.749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡinDmFn5IL1
749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdwJOXNcskf
He surveys the apartment. It’s bland and undecorated, but the wooden dining table seems ready to splinter under the weight of open textbooks and notebooks. A closed MacBook charges, precariously close to a half-finished mug of coffee. Eli leans forward and looks at the notebook, immediately recognizing the handwriting.749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGWUOusQtNd
749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaHSGXktkFu
It isn’t possible.749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMt0S7eZJi7
749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpwUfGpc7JD
He glances toward a closed door that he assumes is a bedroom and makes his way over warily, quietly pushing it open. There’s a bed on the other side, up against the wall. Moonlight streams directly upon the sleeping form. Her back is turned, and even if it weren’t for the dark hair ribboning across the pillow, he still would have recognized her.749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDrFBFfTl1Y
749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN3JVxBTsEU
He creeps closer—she’s a notoriously light sleeper—and takes a better look. She shifts in her sleep slightly, as though she can sense she has a visitor. And then he sees her face. Mari looks pretty much the same as she did when he saw her a few hours ago, only more vulnerable. There are streaks of lavender in her hair, starting at her scalp and traveling out. Her bangs are shorter, settling on her closed eyelids. There’s still a hint of baby softness that hasn’t yet melted away to reveal the sultry cheekbones in the Mari he loves.749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvqhzGwCYeI
749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡj2NhRnoI6c
Eli presses a button on her phone, illuminating the screen, to see the date. Five years ago to the day.749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoE0ihAyhan
749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3LNoio8RYJ
If this is right, if this isn’t a dream of some sort, he’s seeing her when she was the same age as he is now. He looks at the meteor, still in his hand. He isn’t sure how he knows this, but he’s suddenly sure the meteor was his ticket here and will be his ticket back to his year.749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtsfXhGsmhi
749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9VkZGw2mgy
But he has an idea. Now that he’s here, why not stay? He’ll age with her, and she will no longer be five years older than him. He’ll make it work, somehow—find a way to survive as a twenty-year-old in this year, stage a run-in with her. She’ll fall in love with him again, but they’ll be on equal ground.749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuy42gih0P5
749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡl1M3XVn9tS
Sliding the little meteor piece into his pocket, he takes a deep breath, excitement mounting at the thought of starting again with her at the same age—even if she is still a month older. They’ll have five more years together than they would have otherwise.749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRv8Uk0NDow
749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtmummEeA8h
“Is this really want you want?” Mari asked him multiple times, a shrewd look on her face. “With me five years older than you, you do realize things might need to happen five years faster than you want them to, right?”749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5OCyruxwZq
749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3UikPJaRJc
“Like what?” he said.749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdbTNLCFCwD
749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOMNkfemMGk
“Getting married, having kids,” she said.749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPysT8UxN0I
749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7m1VgzQ71X
“Well, good thing you warned me about it now,” Eli said. “Now I’m mentally prepared.”749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvI4ZHDEAzj
749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq7C2IFZjzH
“Seriously, though,” she said. “Don’t you want someone your age?”749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3KzKKa35yj
749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr903cgzNH1
Eli sits cross-legged on the floor beside her bed, deflating instantly. If he stays here isn’t he finding someone his own age. He told her he didn’t care about their age difference. And he doesn’t, really. He presses the heels of his hands to his eyes, feeling a little dizzy as if he just got off a rollercoaster.749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfi0tTDXSms
749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgd4GbOuSEM
“I can’t believe you’ve never ridden a rollercoaster before,” Eli said.749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡo9DEFpeSUC
749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9aG8IbSfSX
Mari gripped his hand, her nails digging into his skin. Her eyes were wide, focused on the car that sped by thunderously. The riders’ screams seemed to hover in the air behind them.749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx8prWQavwe
749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUbuYeKKPNK
“Well,” she said. “I guess this is all part of our goal of making new memories together.”749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzHUiZqt1NO
749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsl16RVAqEN
This Mari sleeping in front of him doesn’t have that memory of riding the rollercoaster with him. She doesn’t have any of the memories they’ve created over the past two years. The situation would be unbalanced with him knowing her soul even as she tries to discover his.749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcqUNy0zGW7
749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1yfZH8ZDC5
Eli takes the meteor out of his pocket. It seems like it’s getting warmer. He stands up and looks at her again, a little sad at the thought of a future that can never be. Taking his chance, he leans forward and presses a kiss to her forehead, just above her left eyebrow. Even five years ago, she used the smell shampoo she uses in the present.749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHdnyCFmTFq
749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQEMHRldqE3
Mari stretches and blinks blearily at him. He knows she was almost blind pre-LASIK. This Mari can barely see anything without her glasses or contacts. He must be just a blonde-haired outline to her, too indistinct for her to even tell he’s Korean under that blonde hair.749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwCIq5W27il
749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6sycp63E1U
“Who are you?” she murmurs.749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡghahxZYs9z
749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEtKFd2nn3n
He thinks about it for a moment and speaks softly to keep from waking her up completely. “I’m someone you haven’t met yet—someone you’ll meet in the future and fall in love with, but not quite as deeply as I’ll fall in love with you.”749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqBXkuBT9Ua
749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxJ7IwVMhMR
“Why?” Her voice is still groggy, eyes half-closed.749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ972DpbrPSz
749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzmv7DDzOT3
“Because I’m younger than you,” Eli says, gently putting a finger to her cheek. “It’ll bother you, and I think you won’t believe me when I say just how much I love you. But I love you, and only you, and especially you when you’re five years older than me. Don’t forget it, okay?”749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu3dCyyqsLb
749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN6X8p3bYMT
He holds his pinky out to her. She curves her own pinky around his. Her skin is almost as warm as the meteor.749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMJUmQmJlzJ
749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyNLVRCdveY
“Okay.” Her voice is nearly gone now as she sinks back into sleep.749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaQzOjWsXqv
749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZQ1TI6ij8L
He holds the meteor in his palm as it burns more fiercely, watching this Mari and thinking about the Mari waiting for him back in his present.749Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZS97xf2BOj
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