->>>遇上中二NPC,就交給更搞怪的醉喵美人吧!
【凌家動物園 III 小強星人也求愛】爆炸頭不要來
By 喵芭渴死姬
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAqUrvgStOi4
25. 酒瘋最無敵
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『【特殊劇情任務】《奇怪的求救信》:請真誠抒發您對罷課司機的看法以領取獎勵。建議參考用詞:英俊瀟灑、英偉不凡、氣宇軒昂、才貌雙全、史前無敵帥、帥宅之王……』1132Please respect copyright.PENANATLQ9tEZS9V
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「……」1132Please respect copyright.PENANA1qjbVP8OVL
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這任務怎麼看起來怪怪的?一定是他們救NPC的方式不對,可以請巨山人再壓回去嗎?1132Please respect copyright.PENANAlS2M2JsQ5E
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他們無言打量正拍打身上泥灰的罷課司機,明顯幾天沒洗的黑短髮參差凌亂,被超大黑色護目鏡遮蓋的臉只露出細小鼻尖與笑來頗猥瑣的嘴,蠟黃暗沈的皮膚毫無氣色,瘦小單薄的身材似營養不良,卻沒有喵喵仙貝那樣惹人憐愛的纖弱,反散發著極濃的阿宅味,特別是那不時低笑的顆顆聲,實在有種莫名的熟悉感啊!1132Please respect copyright.PENANA3XVc6uHIyP
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塞倫蹙眉思索這任務用意,忽然要他們對NPC拍馬屁也太怪了吧?1132Please respect copyright.PENANAomhXKY9VPZ
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泰迪熊則索性無視任務,一心照顧懷裡的小醉喵,無暇多慮其他。倒是肉盾與罷課司機忽然肅色互視,讓塞倫聞到了一股風雨欲來的中二味。1132Please respect copyright.PENANA4lsE7ceOTK
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「讚啦!」罷課司機比出一個大拇指,頗有英雄惜英雄之感,「沒想到真有人把自己搞成這樣,真是太有品味了!」1132Please respect copyright.PENANAU9MS9wyQL4
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品味?塞倫的額上滑了三條黑線。1132Please respect copyright.PENANAmuz4C3gjWO
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「知己啊!終於有人欣賞哥的帥了!」肉盾立馬感動得痛哭流涕,踮腳重拍罷課司機的肩膀欣喜嘶吼:「兄弟!哥也覺得你的墨鏡實在超有型啊!時尚界就該有你這樣的犀利美!」1132Please respect copyright.PENANA8FOCAq4Dhr
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「什麼?你喜歡靈腦鏡勝過老子的帥嗎?」罷課司機頓時臉色一變,鼠軀一震,讓人還以為肉盾講錯話,誰知他下一秒竟激動地捧住爆炸頭,「阿肉!你果然是知己啊!你知道嗎?為了發明史上最酷炫先進的靈腦鏡,老子不知跟好基友耗費多少心力,這可是我們最引以為傲的傑作啊!沒想到你竟能一眼識破它的價值,真是眼光獨到品味一流的天才呀!」1132Please respect copyright.PENANAhsJTcCPyWP
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「叮!」溫和大叔系統音響起了,「恭喜玩家肉盾阿弗羅觸發特殊轉折情境,【特殊劇情任務】《奇怪的求救信》將進入【第二階特殊任務】《基地一日遊》,請玩家繼續進行任務。」1132Please respect copyright.PENANA9fY4NNPfIA
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「……」1132Please respect copyright.PENANAUHPUw6YYud
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「嘖,哥就是這麼厲害!」肉盾驕傲地抬起頭自豪道,小強觸角還貼心地替他撥Q毛瀏海,塞倫便忍不住瞥了道白眼,果然討好奇葩NPC還是得由奇葩肉盾來。1132Please respect copyright.PENANAzGZ35B4Kb0
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「走!帶你們去實驗基地參觀,我們還研發了很多神奇道具,可以送你們幾樣做回禮,順便讓阿拔瞧瞧阿肉。」罷課司機熱情地發出邀請,順道介紹即將出場的另一名NPC,「阿拔就是老子的好基友,叫拔個死機,他肯定也會欣賞阿肉這顆頭的。」1132Please respect copyright.PENANArm0HrG4UFr
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罷課司機、拔個死機……果真是好基友,這諧音的取名方式真有官方特色呀!1132Please respect copyright.PENANAK4fIpu6MlA
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「你們去,我帶貝兒回城。」始終哄不定又鬧脾氣的小醉喵,泰迪熊只得暫時放棄任務,打算找個地方幫喵喵仙貝熬過酒醉狀態,不過,喝醉的人可不願了。1132Please respect copyright.PENANARcXGJhdXbO
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「喵?捨摸『八個疵雞』?窩也要疵窩也要疵窩也要疵疵疵疵喵——」吃貨醉了還是吃貨,一聽到食物名就吵著要吃,儘管是將人名誤聽成食物,也不顧哥哥哄勸地拼命揮舞四隻肉球,發出口齒不清的喵聲喵語。1132Please respect copyright.PENANA9PUSQj7rV1
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「唉!」泰迪熊真心無奈了,只得連聲說好算是答應同行。1132Please respect copyright.PENANAFaSSb9o6k8
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看面癱大神吃鱉挫敗的樣子,真是太好玩了!旁觀的塞倫與肉盾忍不住互視竊笑,一同在心裡比了個讚——小貝兒醉得好!1132Please respect copyright.PENANAgDt57cbnvm
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依據指示,實驗基地位於飄浮在大陸西北上空的虛詠之島,光是飛行航程就需約二十至四十分鐘。由於罷課司機有獨家研發的飛行摩托車,速度快過火箭噴射機,不論你是多麼優秀的飛行員都望塵莫及。於是,他宅氣側漏地跳上飛行器,啟動引擎轟隆噴出一口燃料廢氣後,就對他們揮了揮導遊旗,「多蘭娜的復活廣場見啊,老子先回城拉屎,憋了好久快受不鳥了。」1132Please respect copyright.PENANAvJ02ObsD5Z
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「……」1132Please respect copyright.PENANAMINiI77Dso
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這位阿宅,您其實可以不用這麼詳實報告去向的。滿臉黑線的幾人不禁秉住呼吸,直到尾隨飛行器的廢氣散去。1132Please respect copyright.PENANAfdw3GjKOuL
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「喵啊!窩要用那個造宇宙粒子傳送機,快點快點喵!」1132Please respect copyright.PENANAdHn8o6Uc5B
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「寶貝兒,那不是我們的。」1132Please respect copyright.PENANAQMdfNqDd5J
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「不管不管喵!」1132Please respect copyright.PENANAMcYHA9j9iS
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「……」1132Please respect copyright.PENANAtuvDGVUQx9
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小醉喵的哥哥大人頭很痛。1132Please respect copyright.PENANAsVLFJT0kqq
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同為獨立於大陸之外的島嶼,卻不同於朦霧島的歡樂活潑,虛詠之島十分寧靜祥和。雖也享有夢幻景致的美譽,但比起埃斯萊森林悠古空靈的自然氣息,虛詠之島更多結合多元素的人造景觀,特別是主城多蘭娜。1132Please respect copyright.PENANAbO8zKAf2e6
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華麗精美的雕刻建築隨處可見,井然有序的市容瀰漫著融合科學與魔法的學術氣息,而這份氣息似乎也跟當地的人文風情有極大關係。不論是NPC或玩家,言談舉止皆和善有禮、斯文靜雅。除了外來旅者較為喧嘩外,幾乎人人都安靜地拿著書坐在一隅品茶閱讀,打扮亦多偏學者的儒雅之風。1132Please respect copyright.PENANArcoXmCWuzC
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肉盾摸著下巴觀察路過的幾個黑袍法師,個個都抱著厚重書本,還圍著一條紅黃條紋的圍巾,頗有Cosplay哈利波特的意味。他再看回身旁一襲精靈絲緞長袍、氣質優雅恬靜的精靈美人,便明白為何塞倫會被分配到虛詠之島了。1132Please respect copyright.PENANA1TjKuSkkIU
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不過,最令他特別好奇的是,應當夜晚時分的天空怎會光亮如日?甚至讓小蝠以為白天了而又沈沈睡去。1132Please respect copyright.PENANAqEtsW7KC1b
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「那是支撐虛詠之島能量的核心。」塞倫指著空中極遠處的白色光球,「因為它從不熄滅,這座島才會永不落日。」1132Please respect copyright.PENANAKYHgqsLJft
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「原來如此啊!」肉盾好奇地打量四周,多以白色調為主的設計,令多蘭娜在能量核的照射下顯得更加亮白,也增添了些許聖潔光芒。1132Please respect copyright.PENANASpNGaI4V9c
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由於此島的降生者多為羽翼類種族,因此他們從島嶼入口處開始,便見到各色羽毛不時隨風飄落,就連塞倫自己也在收翅時無意落了一根,令肉盾不禁發出感嘆,「感覺像來到了天堂。」1132Please respect copyright.PENANABWvXRPxRJw
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塞倫偏頭細想了下,失笑道:「被你這麼一說,還真有點像了。」1132Please respect copyright.PENANAFu7pc7q9EM
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這時,一群NPC孩子正好迎面跑來,塞倫立即腳步一轉換到肉盾的另一側,一路低頭不語地走著,直到那群急匆匆的孩童離去後,他才輕吁地望回前方。1132Please respect copyright.PENANAc2lR9OGDvm
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「小倫很怕小孩嗎?」肉盾察覺那短暫的不安,忍不住握上他的手發問了。1132Please respect copyright.PENANAz7fBbJnyyp
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果然還是被發現了。塞倫面有難色地抿了抿嘴,只得點頭輕應承認,「嗯。」1132Please respect copyright.PENANAUqC0dJ5QIw
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「為什麼啊?小孩不是很可愛嗎?」肉盾實在好奇極了,一般人頂多不喜歡小孩,對孩子們保持冷漠態度,但像塞倫怕成這樣的卻是不多見。1132Please respect copyright.PENANA0C4mK8jUs6
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「哪裡可愛啊?吵得要命……」塞倫也不知自己怎麼回事,竟不禁低聲抱怨起對小孩的各種怨念,彷彿是終於抓到一個宣洩的出口,「動不動就要討吃的,給的東西不對就一直鬧,我就不懂他們為什麼不能安靜地看書畫圖?」1132Please respect copyright.PENANAs1iWgEVrEM
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與此同時,跟在後頭的兄弟組——1132Please respect copyright.PENANAyP80O7Bnj4
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「哥~我要吃炸牛排蕃茄冰淇淋雞翅麵啦喵~」小醉喵嘩啦嘩啦點了道組和囧異的料理,讓奶爸大哥苦惱了。1132Please respect copyright.PENANAgwUJVLjCTy
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「寶貝兒,沒有這種麵,吃炸雞好嗎?」1132Please respect copyright.PENANAfikSMXKXT8
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「不管不管!我要吃炸蕃茄牛肉冰火鍋雞就是要吃啦喵!」1132Please respect copyright.PENANAopmidUhrNI
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「唉……」1132Please respect copyright.PENANAhKcFIYJQQQ
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沒注意到後頭的動靜,塞倫想起小時候上幼稚園的痛苦——生性較同齡早熟自律的他,總是與其他孩童格格不入,長大後見小孩大多差不多型態,就更加覺得難以理解。於是,他持續皺眉道:「而且很愛哭,不順意的話就一直哭,哭個不停,怎麼勸都沒用,好像我欠他的一樣。」1132Please respect copyright.PENANAim9iWsp8NG
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「寶貝兒,這不能吃。」奶爸大哥緊急從小醉貓的嘴裡搶下柺杖糖法杖。1132Please respect copyright.PENANAWLUkx4vbef
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「喵啊——哥不愛我都不給我吃!喵嗚啊——」1132Please respect copyright.PENANAl6cxnizXVJ
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「好好好,吃這個,乖。」頭大的奶爸大哥趕緊抽出一根普通的棒棒糖塞進小醉喵嘴裡。1132Please respect copyright.PENANAKNy3oTn6RX
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「喵唔……呣呣呣……」1132Please respect copyright.PENANA9P6ptQUB3J
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這時,塞倫又記起以前不得不幫同村鄰居看小孩的經驗,便不滿地嘟起嘴,「又很愛叫人抱,明明有手有腳也會自己走,就偏要人抱,黏得半死都甩不開。」1132Please respect copyright.PENANA24pYhg4gE1
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「哥~抱抱喵~」1132Please respect copyright.PENANAsY22oKmRRZ
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「已經在抱了。」1132Please respect copyright.PENANAg7wp28BSaO
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「抱抱~抱抱抱緊緊嘛喵~」1132Please respect copyright.PENANABXw6pyqHRl
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「好,抱緊緊不放開。」1132Please respect copyright.PENANAjM2mwBefET
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「那些就算了,最討厭的是他們超愛咬人!」塞倫始終不懂自己有什麼吸引小孩咬的體質,從小到大就常有小孩莫名撲來咬他,最高紀錄是一小時內被咬了八口,害他現在一看到小孩就比見鬼還恐慌。他想起這些悲慘遭遇,便不禁悲憤地紅了眼眶,「忽然就很用力地咬,痛得要命,簡直比瘋狗還愛亂咬人!」1132Please respect copyright.PENANAn4aUsbtZc7
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「唔!」1132Please respect copyright.PENANAiF9UtNLmxq
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「喵嗚~咬咬咬嘛喵~」1132Please respect copyright.PENANAMIS0qvpnGU
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「好,寶貝兒想咬哪,哥都讓你。」1132Please respect copyright.PENANAC8U54gscVM
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「噗哧……」一邊聽著塞倫控訴小孩惡行,一邊偷聽後頭似在驗證般上演奶爸哄醉娃戲,早已憋到抽慉不止的肉盾,再也忍不住地捧腹大笑,「哈哈哈哈!天,你們真是太可愛了!」1132Please respect copyright.PENANAUzgOy3MqGG
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「這有什麼好笑的?」沒想到肉盾會是這種反應,塞倫頓時怒地瞪過去。1132Please respect copyright.PENANAjHutl42T9o
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「小倫第一次對我說這麼多內心話啊。」能看到塞倫從未展露的一面,肉盾實在既欣喜又愛得不得了,「你是不是開始喜歡我了?」1132Please respect copyright.PENANARKApeB6LXz
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「什……你……」塞倫呆了三秒,隨後惱羞成怒地踢去一腳後,快步離開,「你有病!」1132Please respect copyright.PENANA1m22keQfqr
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「唉呀!」肉盾吃痛地跳著腳邊傻笑追上,「小倫,小倫,我也好喜歡你啊!」1132Please respect copyright.PENANAN2XGlr8mmd
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「閉嘴!」1132Please respect copyright.PENANAU7gPdAt0WQ
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悠閒寧靜的多蘭娜裡,通往復活廣場的街道上,羞紅一張漂亮臉蛋的精靈美人怒氣沖沖地走在最前頭,與這華美街景極度違合的小強爆炸頭蠢笑兮兮地追在身後告白,捧著酒醉小萌貓看似苦惱卻又寵溺不已的俊美仙魔祭司慢悠悠尾隨最後。1132Please respect copyright.PENANAOPYdiitVP7
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如此組合怪異的隊伍,為一向平靜的夢幻城都帶來又一樁NPC與玩家茶餘飯後的八卦閒聊,以致於幾位愛當媒人的NPC也臨時起意,打算舉辦一場有助情侶培養奸情的特殊活動。1132Please respect copyright.PENANAUUW3gtC77G
ε٩(๑> ₃ <)۶з Σ>—(〃°ω°〃)♥ → (╭ ̄3 ̄)╭♥ σ ゚∀ ゚) ゚∀゚)σ ლ(╹ε╹ლ)
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAfCuzNuLMqe
與看起來清爽不少的罷課司機會合後,一行人隨他出了守衛異常嚴格的西門,在罷課司機拍胸保證行程絕對安全的承諾下,他們抱著估計不輕鬆的心情,朝據說超級近的實驗基地出發。1132Please respect copyright.PENANAoTST6ewW3R
1132Please respect copyright.PENANANXcAR0RRsS
「媽啊!怎麼突然多這麼多怪啊?」1132Please respect copyright.PENANAEhAnWCUTKZ
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAupYtdxdVBA
在第四波圍攻怪群的最後一隻菁英怪終於轟然倒下後,躲在泰迪熊背後的俗辣阿宅NPC,才跳出來對屍體一陣猛踹,爾後神情嚴肅地宣布:「老子眉頭一皺,覺得案情並不單純!」1132Please respect copyright.PENANAFwPqMwHo2h
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAHRDf3oPLuh
「……」1132Please respect copyright.PENANARi0gCnCyeH
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAEpFyEpt5sk
「……」1132Please respect copyright.PENANA7xvuPk8Zfd
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAh8Kdsfe4iy
「……」1132Please respect copyright.PENANA3yjcqGK35i
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAPRJUrEKEuh
「嗯——喵——」1132Please respect copyright.PENANAzti5BDH8xo
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAMG1gGEZcMM
一片沈默中,四腳並立直直坐在哥哥肩膀上的小醉喵,學獅子王「咆哮」一聲後,完全無視隊友想扁某宅又想吐槽他的神情,伸出一隻小肉球指向還在裝刑偵隊長的罷課司機,自認嚴肅威武、威震八方地喵聲道:「I can see you 喵~」1132Please respect copyright.PENANAaWnKk8I8ur
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAnyzgpceuuF
這下換罷課司機嘴角抽筋了。1132Please respect copyright.PENANAk0ZetE2FZH
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAXtsOHC45rp
泰迪熊失笑地將小醉喵摟回懷裡,觀望與多蘭娜截然不同的枯黃荒野,淡聲問塞倫:「這區一向如此?」1132Please respect copyright.PENANAXh71Sxrxla
1132Please respect copyright.PENANA4Gm9mX3kVX
「我也是第一次出西門,只知道這裡沒過八十級最好不要來。」塞倫的等級是後來才跟他們練上來的,對此地的認知也只停留在打聽來的資訊。他打開多蘭娜精靈長老送他的筆記,蹙眉查看,「不對,書裡寫著多蘭娜西邊的花園四季如春,跟這裡的景象對不起來。」1132Please respect copyright.PENANAOYsDAbaNGj
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAyQQGdx0hKG
「是四季如春啊,看這遍地青青小草,鳥語花香,多溫暖宜人啊!」罷課司機張開雙臂,一副沐浴春風貌。1132Please respect copyright.PENANAFzeuMQfrBv
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAc64W0y9YmZ
「……」有面癱散發了淡淡的殺氣。1132Please respect copyright.PENANAS8XqGJapyk
1132Please respect copyright.PENANA3Ch6sehJhS
「啊,哥知道了!」肉盾推了下反光的宅宅眼鏡,以名偵探柯南的架勢說:「罷課老兄,你的墨鏡太黑遮住顏色啦,這裡全是黃土,連一根草都沒有啊!」1132Please respect copyright.PENANAbs4ARdZY6T
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAV44pjeq1dV
「瞎密?怎麼可能?」罷課司機驚訝了。1132Please respect copyright.PENANAH6IcmJIIGm
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAcWCKFWzkBZ
「你拿掉墨鏡看看不就知道了?」塞倫沒好氣說道。1132Please respect copyright.PENANAW3vBgPuTyp
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAZDSprj1gyT
罷課司機嬌羞了,「不行啦,老子的眼睛太迷人,你們會愛上老子的~」1132Please respect copyright.PENANAKIXXVk833K
1132Please respect copyright.PENANA8FSTI2cbid
「……」1132Please respect copyright.PENANACI13TFiOjU
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAKaDkGWxa6U
會扁你還差不多!這下連塞倫都想加入殺氣大放送行列。1132Please respect copyright.PENANAbBvDXOUUja
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAZXibLl1k9f
「嗯——喵——」喵喵仙貝又學了次嬌萌版獅子王,不過這次是仰躺在哥哥懷裡求揉捏。他醉茫茫地朝罷課司機伸出小肉球,自認正氣凜然怒喵道:「窩要代替金剛狼戳爆尼的眼!喵~」1132Please respect copyright.PENANANUHeMa6Rjp
1132Please respect copyright.PENANASGXbvQ2h7w
於是,罷課司機在弟控大哥舉起法杖的冷笑下,哭哭地轉過身背對他們,晃了下護目鏡快速瞧一眼後,爆出驚聲尖叫:「天啊啊啊!一定是基地裡的控制台出問題啦!」1132Please respect copyright.PENANAnS0EeYpNEy
1132Please respect copyright.PENANA9y07lMoTiW
「控制台?控制這一區的氣象?」肉盾不解了。1132Please respect copyright.PENANAI2pGYOq0hW
1132Please respect copyright.PENANA2ojGqrzAiY
「老子跟阿拔研發了水利控制儀,跟多蘭娜簽約負責調控這裡的灌溉設施,花園突然枯萎了,肯定就是故障啦!」罷課司機驚慌地調出飛行器,「不行,我們得加快速度,怪了!阿拔怎會沒注意到啊?」1132Please respect copyright.PENANAPW6sXrNmrU
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAN6Gzbrakuh
一開始就用飛的不就好了?三人深深覺得剛那幾場架打得好無奈,唯有小醉喵暈忽忽地晃著小貓頭,完全不知人間疾苦。1132Please respect copyright.PENANA6DZ0TDAtvy
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAFaSCVQ02bl
一行人風風火火地飛到傳說中的實驗基地前,望著一矗立前方的十八公尺鋼彈立像建築,停在空中的幾人頓時無語了。1132Please respect copyright.PENANA16WMcaS1z0
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAIF5HpnuQyq
這……是宅男基地吧?對模型沒什麼熱誠的塞倫,忍不住搧著翅膀默默吐槽了。1132Please respect copyright.PENANAX7ojOBYpmf
1132Please respect copyright.PENANA7WNzR2ZxuU
哇塞!是RG 1/1 RX-78-2鋼彈Ver.GFT耶!相當有男兒熱血夢的肉盾,發出景仰的鏡片反光。1132Please respect copyright.PENANAhxCFFEml4k
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAoknJrttcxM
寶貝兒還有兩個小時才清醒,希望不會有宿醉狀態,唉……奶爸大哥的弟控模式照常運作。1132Please respect copyright.PENANA6sjsxgbodF
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAaByKJeFjcx
「喵啊!」依舊狀況外的喵喵仙貝醉得兩眼朦朧,伸出小肉球一語打破沈默,「大黃蜂者摸漂白惹喵?趕快召喚宇宙九頭龍喵~」1132Please respect copyright.PENANA2c5K4z6PFP
1132Please respect copyright.PENANA1eiRLcQueE
於是,一場機器人粉絲間的熱烈討論也隨之展開了——1132Please respect copyright.PENANAKS5GPNRLtu
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAk08SZae8SN
「小貝兒,那是鋼彈,不是變形金剛。」1132Please respect copyright.PENANAdLfdYjE6RA
1132Please respect copyright.PENANALx7vK5ig1l
「乾蛋喵?窩不要疵乾掉的蛋蛋啦喵~」1132Please respect copyright.PENANAijeqoBhG3C
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAlCEdilhDLy
「是鋼彈,不是乾蛋。」1132Please respect copyright.PENANAv5SJNjBNqJ
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAMW5MsoCN2R
「喔,是糕蛋不是鋼彈,那我可以疵嗎喵?」1132Please respect copyright.PENANA9HlUJrn6Ld
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAHMPvP1aYju
「當然不能吃啊!」1132Please respect copyright.PENANA7qH8a1KFyp
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAuF5NI0pvQV
「那他們喜歡疵蛋糕嗎喵?」1132Please respect copyright.PENANAmXXCHm6Cwb
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAtyQbE192vf
「小貝兒,鋼彈不吃東西的。」1132Please respect copyright.PENANAkAUbYhoBeY
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAEh6t5f6v9i
「那捨摸東西疵鋼彈呀喵?」1132Please respect copyright.PENANA4hJCCyQxTi
1132Please respect copyright.PENANA5ka0Ny7nSp
「這是個好問題,讓哥來想想……」1132Please respect copyright.PENANAjR0qqYJVVj
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAjkyLeAe3pp
這是什麼沒營養的對話啊?塞倫黑線地撇過頭,決定不管那顆沒事跟小醉喵認真的爆炸頭。他見罷課司機像無頭蒼蠅繞著基地飛來飛去似在檢查什麼,便乾脆提聲問:「你不會是找不到入口了吧?」1132Please respect copyright.PENANABWpWWagyqI
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAVLKpeYYVqx
「是找不到老子和阿拔的簽名啊!」罷課司機噴哭地飛回來,對他們指著鋼彈的額頭,「上面本來還有『罷課司機與拔個死機版權所有』的聲明,結果也都不見啦!」1132Please respect copyright.PENANAhlLv06DAkw
1132Please respect copyright.PENANA2yinOzjEHP
這時,泰迪熊忽然眼神凌厲地瞪向鋼彈,迅速揮杖為隊伍施上加速和加防狀態,同時駕著仙雲往後飛,「退!」1132Please respect copyright.PENANAvJMatRVBBl
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAneMVxS0s7s
話才說完,一道機器音的警告隨之響起,鋼彈的雙眼也冒出駭人紅光,「發現可疑入侵者,即刻消滅!」1132Please respect copyright.PENANA6Vr1w55egJ
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAgjXAm6q9kh
「媽呀!被激光打到必死啊啊啊!」俗辣NPC立馬就將油門轉到底噴吐大量灰煙後,就毫不客氣地丟下他們先飛逃了,「老子在復活廣場等你們啊——」1132Please respect copyright.PENANAcVu0XXU31K
1132Please respect copyright.PENANApsvCDbiw7Z
「……」1132Please respect copyright.PENANATRUtT2vN4D
1132Please respect copyright.PENANA37tbs0GH5a
已認定他們絕對會滅團了,是嗎?1132Please respect copyright.PENANAFDO7KD7Isu
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAjIZ3Gg3aF9
烏煙瘴氣中,塞倫和泰迪熊冒起滿額青筋地飛閃身後不斷射來的激光攻擊。肉盾明白塞倫的翅膀沒有泰迪熊靈敏,便轉身抱住他使出頭好壯壯防護罩,以減少被激光擦身而過的傷害,一邊提示閃躲方向。倒是喵喵仙貝醉濛中以為在玩星際大戰,還歡樂地扒上哥哥肩膀丟了幾道降電術,竟真打中鋼彈頭部造成一台激光發射器故障,替他們減輕了不少負擔。1132Please respect copyright.PENANAj1E1UzPBid
1132Please respect copyright.PENANA8ksZPrh4Hu
有驚無險地退出鋼彈攻擊範圍後,他們緩下速度朝多蘭娜飛去,一時間無人說話,除了小醉喵的胡言亂語。1132Please respect copyright.PENANAMVf2HxpS8r
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAm2RGIkEzby
「等等!我剛看到一個NPC在廢墟裡。」肉盾忽然說道。1132Please respect copyright.PENANA4KBzuHCTcW
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAIxGEaOHgjt
「什麼?」塞倫停住飛行喘著氣低問。剛那場逃生飛行難度比從朦霧島飛回大陸還高上許多,因而也耗費太多體力,若不是肉盾主動抱著自己,他可能手軟得連人都抓不住。1132Please respect copyright.PENANAs2cpMNBjqz
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAF3HT3dhLDD
「那人好像也戴著墨鏡。」肉盾確認了下地面的狀況後,揚聲朝前方的泰迪熊呼喊:「泰!這一帶的怪不多,我們下去找人順便休息一下吧。」1132Please respect copyright.PENANAScpMsxBl9j
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAGYt7YnvLRN
「嗯。」1132Please respect copyright.PENANALzzKUalLKr
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAc5kvaUGPrD
他們調頭飛向先前路過的唯一一座廢墟,果真發現一中年男子傷痕累累地倒在斷垣邊。男子膚色黝黑,體形壯碩,若非臉上戴著超大黑色護目鏡,還真難猜出對方就是罷課司機的好基友。1132Please respect copyright.PENANAVTtT0LEFOQ
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAdCFCEkEyZ7
「看來還活著?」肉盾戳了戳昏迷中的人說道。1132Please respect copyright.PENANAcCGuETSfng
1132Please respect copyright.PENANA2oFsmDyTei
泰迪熊二話不說地施了治癒術,男子的傷口立即止住血,人也悠悠醒了過來,頭頂狀態顯示著『虛弱』狀態。1132Please respect copyright.PENANAwqghFFLaYA
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAFjreANEjTS
「拔個老兄,你還好吧?」肉盾拍著對方肩膀關切問道,卻不慎一掌打到人家的傷口上。1132Please respect copyright.PENANAddffqLZv7w
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAKSHnQxGRWy
「呃啊……」於是人又暈過去了。1132Please respect copyright.PENANAQoW2oe1CsM
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAzHsoCVLKMG
「哇啊!抱歉!抱歉!哥不是故意的!」肉盾驚慌地晃著拔個死機,「拔個老兄別死啊!你死了我們怎麼跟罷課兄交代啊?」1132Please respect copyright.PENANACz2t2Ccapv
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAZfHasuKLLB
「死惹喵?」差點要被哄睡的小醉喵不知又腦補到什麼,再度激動地跳起來扒著爪子大哭,「喵啊啊——死啦死啦喵~八個都死蹺蹺啦喵啊——」1132Please respect copyright.PENANAfyfLUYchNM
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAb8JnJc80oF
「……」1132Please respect copyright.PENANA60MwBzqWKi
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAuC7h9fMJFv
奶爸大哥萬般惆悵地重嘆口氣,那神情簡直就像養了一批過動兒的苦情單親媽媽,讓塞倫忍不住又竊笑地按下拍照鍵,深感今日真是收穫良多啊!1132Please respect copyright.PENANAtg6QFfveRd
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAw0D4eigHWn
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAB28uLpc3WK
ε٩(๑> ₃ <)۶з Σ>—(〃°ω°〃)♥ → (╭ ̄3 ̄)╭♥ σ ゚∀ ゚) ゚∀゚)σ ლ(╹ε╹ლ)
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAQR2haXHxdc
用驢車將拔個死機載回多蘭娜後,罷課司機一見好基友半死不活的樣子,當場就鬼哭神號了起來。好不容易被哄睡的小醉喵也因此又醒了過來,不明就裡地跟著喵啊喵啊亂哭一通,讓泰迪熊頓時怒火沖天殺氣暴漲,舉杖就要痛扁這隻中二破表的NPC,幸好拔個死機及時醒來,才免去一場暴走玩家於大庭廣眾追殺NPC的風波。1132Please respect copyright.PENANATNx8hAaO0v
1132Please respect copyright.PENANA5unkrD18DS
最後,他們在拔個死機氣游若絲的斷續講述中,總算得知了事情原委——自從罷課司機一去不返後,拔個死機為了尋找失蹤的好基友,過於忙碌而一時分神,竟讓覬覦他們鋼彈基地已久的死對頭率軍入侵,他一人敵不了龐大的怪物軍團,便勉強負傷逃了出來。1132Please respect copyright.PENANAmktx5jm3Ah
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAJTnFOkdFuE
「叮!」像是裝了變聲器的宅宅系統音怪腔怪調地響起了,「恭喜玩家泰迪熊餅乾等人觸發【第三階特殊任務】《鳩佔鵲巢》,請儘速為兩位無家可歸的可憐帥宅奪回心愛的鋼彈實驗基地,不過首先還請將拔個死機送醫急救,順便幫付一下醫療費唷~」1132Please respect copyright.PENANArYZdG0or9u
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAvr01dfkx3r
「……」1132Please respect copyright.PENANAZdHNRrDwmv
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAcek2oKzOyn
不如直接放給他死順便了結另一隻算了!不能隨意宰殺NPC這設定真是惱人啊!1132Please respect copyright.PENANAmvlj1S0H98
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAYKtWNMARok
半小時後,幾人於醫院病房開了場戰略會議。在詳細問過敵方資訊後,除了兩眼呆滯抱著葡萄晶鑽冰棒啃的小醉喵外,其他人都陷入一陣沈默。1132Please respect copyright.PENANA26otzEX3zU
1132Please respect copyright.PENANA8kJDk1EhLW
「數量這麼多,室內空間也不像戶外寬敞,對我不太有利呀。」肉盾苦惱地抓著爆炸頭,小強觸角也擺成攤手狀,表示愛莫能助。1132Please respect copyright.PENANAExWS0OiONb
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAo0xa78JuOd
「需額外的近戰主攻,防要夠高。」泰迪熊輕撫懷裡的小醉喵,盯著罷課司機提供的基地內部藍圖,「塞倫和貝兒的攻擊力雖高,但這批怪多是菁英怪,清怪速度勢必不如往常,肉盾的負擔會過重,若有高傷系備用坦交替支撐,我們較有充分應變的緩衝時間。」1132Please respect copyright.PENANAG8cHb8Kt0e
1132Please respect copyright.PENANA7yppEGmpoK
「老子的攻擊力也很強的!」罷課司機掏出改造機關槍兇狠道,不過沒人理他。1132Please respect copyright.PENANAuqqq655bP6
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAz8zHIImlVh
「高攻近戰……戰士、武僧、劍士之類嗎?」塞倫打開搜尋頻道,望著上頭滿滿的求隊伍或徵隊員告示,卻覺不甚可靠,畢竟與不熟的人組隊總會有風險。不過,自己當初也是喵喵仙貝隨手抓來組隊的打手,卻不知怎地演變成現在這樣了。1132Please respect copyright.PENANAJUx7yaRP2X
1132Please respect copyright.PENANA7PRaDTnLpf
有這疑慮的不止塞倫,泰迪熊也不喜跟陌生人組隊。隱私權遮罩雖能擋去他們的名字,卻限制不了隊友的查看,PVP也仍會留下記錄,因此他們兄弟倆向來是獨闖天涯,直到草原大暴走任務。當時喵喵仙貝不知為何竟主動邀請塞倫,還讓他也加對方好友,事後他沒特別多問,只知道寶貝兒對塞倫特別感興趣。1132Please respect copyright.PENANA15WMiC1SLT
1132Please respect copyright.PENANASkOJvSBRne
怎麼都不說話了?肉盾不解地看看兩人,疑惑問:「不就需要多一個近戰隊友嗎?小倫,我們認識一個啊,還是你的朋友呢!」1132Please respect copyright.PENANAl15gfyzGLO
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAGk9yftT8xZ
這話才說完,一個名字就在他們的好友名單上亮起,塞倫頓時愣了下,肉盾則興奮歡呼:「太巧啦!唬爛美人!」1132Please respect copyright.PENANAdvzGP2L6tB
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAwppGhp9B0N
泰迪熊微挑眉瞧了眼他們,捕捉到塞倫一閃而過的尷尬後,才冷眼看向頻道中跳出的一排密語——1132Please respect copyright.PENANAYFvRmywozZ
1132Please respect copyright.PENANADL49HZ4s8K
『【私密】偏向唬爛行對您悄悄說:表哥,貝兒是壓力太大讀書讀瘋啦?傳了一堆亂碼信件給我,看都看不懂!』1132Please respect copyright.PENANAGPseuAbQLm
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAct07b81Gue
「……」奶爸大哥的嘴角抽了。1132Please respect copyright.PENANAoVQ96yvkAw
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAPYkTvb7XHB
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAVP1rtoJlTg
十分鐘後——
『【隊伍】偏向唬爛行:靠!搞了老半天,你們早就混在一起啦?連大頭都是!』1132Please respect copyright.PENANApgytsVfRLZ
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAamp3oZUpcI
『【隊伍】偏向唬爛行:虧老娘還一直想著要怎麼幫你們介紹,但時間老是湊不到一塊,不是貝兒剛好下線就是老娘正好有事,真(嗶——)(嗶——)的……』1132Please respect copyright.PENANADhg7bJxFd5
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAi0WU75pXfi
將唬爛收編入隊後,隊伍頻道就傳來這位女漢子一連串的抒發,直到對方終於消停了,其他人才得空回覆。而塞倫也這才明白,唬爛先前一直說要介紹人給他認識,原來是指這對兄弟,現在回想起來,還真是剛好三方都錯開時間,難得這一次例外。1132Please respect copyright.PENANAeZS0vKujZf
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAXFryu5hxK2
『【隊伍】塞倫:你這時通常不是都在趕稿嗎?寫完了?』1132Please respect copyright.PENANAce94YURjZq
1132Please respect copyright.PENANA8txOxNZeoJ
『【隊伍】肉盾阿弗羅:原來唬爛美人就是小琥?果然!像小琥這般豪爽美人實在不多啊!』1132Please respect copyright.PENANAKETkvWWc9I
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAqqTQxUVRMi
『【隊伍】泰迪熊餅乾:一個小時多蘭娜』1132Please respect copyright.PENANAiKQbQo5Kju
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAhcu6bd1asw
塞倫看了下喵喵仙貝頭頂上的酒醉狀態,還有一個小時才恢復,估計他們得做點別的事殺時間了。正思忖之際,他忽感一道冰冷的視線,便聽泰迪熊說:「你早就知道了。」1132Please respect copyright.PENANAr5FCic9RqL
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAeW2Bbozf6p
沒有尾音微揚的問號,這是個肯定句。塞倫明白對方在問什麼,便無奈點頭,「前陣子剛好聽到那首歌,一時好奇查了下。」1132Please respect copyright.PENANAkW5xwSjCxB
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAi0xj1xllFw
言下之意便是,他不僅知道他們與唬爛的關係,還知道喵喵仙貝的藝人身份。泰迪熊沒再回話,僅是淡漠地收回視線,專心輕撫懷裡打盹的小貓。1132Please respect copyright.PENANAudTWw7YQzW
1132Please respect copyright.PENANA6uOjrjbF5t
肉盾卻是聽得一頭霧水,只得小聲問塞倫:「知道什麼?」1132Please respect copyright.PENANAml3qIjQsxY
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAFDPu4aLohk
塞倫望著那張呆然的臉搖頭,忽而又輕聲笑道:「緣分挺妙的。」1132Please respect copyright.PENANAIL1xRNW0R7
1132Please respect copyright.PENANABC6zelaiLe
「對啊,我們真的很有緣呢。」肉盾傻笑地附和著。1132Please respect copyright.PENANAKI4IVvggzp
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAtLtRteGjkX
儘管他們在現實裡僅有那麼點關連,仍能在另一個世界不期而遇,除了緣分外,確實再沒別的解釋了。於塞倫來說,則更加感慨了,兜兜轉轉地逃避著,最終還是得攤開了嗎?1132Please respect copyright.PENANAVujMJmzBOy
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAknbfA4C9bU
這段沈默並沒有維持很久,僅不過一分鐘,隊伍頻道的訊息又往上跳躍了。1132Please respect copyright.PENANAFAOKFslml4
1132Please respect copyright.PENANA37paDXQFpA
『【隊伍】偏向唬爛行:來了來了!剛跳崖死來多蘭娜,等我灌個藥水先啊。』1132Please respect copyright.PENANA8pQUIEtWvz
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAJcAnJfGMOy
敢情剛才忽然靜音是又再濫用情報員的福利了啊!1132Please respect copyright.PENANA8lNEZhLLBv
1132Please respect copyright.PENANA16V2wmLl9Z
『【隊伍】偏向唬爛行:倫哥,我卡靈感了就上來晃一晃囉~啊你又打算熬夜了吼?小心被阿全念死。』1132Please respect copyright.PENANAwFc3IGBJD9
1132Please respect copyright.PENANASHSgikNyYs
你不老說溜嘴不就好了?塞倫沒好氣地撇了嘴。1132Please respect copyright.PENANA48tH535RwN
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAz6TI8UXKXQ
『【隊伍】偏向唬爛行:欸?大頭怎麼知道老娘是誰?!』1132Please respect copyright.PENANAn4jpGKseMK
1132Please respect copyright.PENANApHf6DQgPHO
『【隊伍】偏向唬爛行:等一下!那自戀狂的講話方式……你該不是……』1132Please respect copyright.PENANAoN53zSHlrh
1132Please respect copyright.PENANApd24eBed8O
『【隊伍】肉盾阿弗羅:我是艾登啊!好久不見啦!!!OvO//』1132Please respect copyright.PENANAqJSjaHAZIE
1132Please respect copyright.PENANA6MEjTg9ROc
『【隊伍】偏向唬爛行:?!!!!!(Bi——)(Bi——)(Bi——)天!老娘馬上過去!大豬頭給老娘等著!!!』1132Please respect copyright.PENANAh6c4WXcclj
1132Please respect copyright.PENANASqnRKNV5ER
「小琥這麼激動幹嘛?」肉盾納悶地抓抓爆炸頭,半晌又恍然大悟地說:「啊!難道她其實很想哥嗎?」1132Please respect copyright.PENANAimDWuKw6BX
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAaJG22uVBmY
塞倫雖也不解,但一聽到那個答案,便黑線地乾笑說:「你應該不是她會想念的類型。」1132Please respect copyright.PENANAlUBQ7nlpiT
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAlehlA9RxBi
「你們自己聊,時間到西門集合。」已猜到是什麼原因,泰迪熊略帶譏笑地微揚嘴角後,便輕柔捧著沈睡的小奶貓往外走去,打算找個清靜處休息,省得唬爛和肉盾這兩個大嗓門一聊歡又吵醒寶貝兒。1132Please respect copyright.PENANAH29gVBciXE
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAHdlo7UMW0W
而事實上,事情也確如泰迪熊預想的那樣。1132Please respect copyright.PENANAB9XEkQWVvg
1132Please respect copyright.PENANA3cLjtrlVN4
「噗哈哈哈哈哈!我的天啊!哈哈哈哈哈!」趕來醫院門口會合的唬爛,指著肉盾捧腹爆笑得前翻後仰,上氣不接下氣,「唉唷……肚子好痛……之、之前……有聽貝兒說……你也有玩,但沒想到……哈哈哈……你會是這德行……哈哈哈哈……」1132Please respect copyright.PENANAKrfa7erSDL
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAG93XjA6kKm
「哥這叫帥得出神入化好嗎?」肉盾悲憤了。1132Please respect copyright.PENANAZwOnhyoEgS
1132Please respect copyright.PENANACIvSBBJgSl
塞倫抿了抿嘴,心想這傢伙丟臉丟到現實朋友去也夠可憐了,便忍笑地輕拍他的肩安撫,邊勸道:「小琥,氣質啊,別笑得這麼誇張。」1132Please respect copyright.PENANAKyPC3gNGUO
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAVQyc2NZLIn
「不、不行……我要跟阿全說!哈哈哈哈!」說到做到的唬爛立即歡樂下線,留下黑線的塞倫一人安慰哭哭中的肉盾。1132Please respect copyright.PENANA0J2jphYHSZ
1132Please respect copyright.PENANA4A73IMfpRw
「阿全阿全!我跟你說!」才拿下遊戲盔,就見哄睡女兒的汪一全正好走進來,凌小琥便立馬揪著他將艾登變爆炸頭的事說了遍,兩夫妻還極沒良心地調出遊戲截圖大肆嘲笑了番。1132Please respect copyright.PENANAt2h2QNeBmi
1132Please respect copyright.PENANABHekT4mqZ7
不過,汪一全終究還是比較正經的人,笑過癮練夠腹肌後,他就突然想起一件事,「你不是說,你最近在幫阿倫和大頭牽線嗎?」1132Please respect copyright.PENANA0SE5lmi5U2
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAwUDqIuO4hg
「對啊!」凌小琥大喇喇地點頭笑道。1132Please respect copyright.PENANAXJw3YXOc37
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAzFFShbCYn3
「然後,你剛說大頭就是艾登。」汪一全推了下眼鏡,異常嚴肅地皺起眉頭,「那個見色就搭訕、到處把妹泡妞、情史豐富、獵豔無數的花心男艾登・蒙達菲?」1132Please respect copyright.PENANAhOuXxVPmxv
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAiLCwsOEDIO
凌小琥頓時僵住了。1132Please respect copyright.PENANAnykKTIHdGz
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAGE5a2CjEzf
「然後你把他跟阿倫湊作對?」汪一全的臉都抽了,「臭小鬼口中的豬頭登跟你的初戀男神倫哥?」1132Please respect copyright.PENANAQOn0nxq8CL
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAGianC1zVOc
這下凌小琥不止僵住還黑了。1132Please respect copyright.PENANA3KUVWnIy8t
1132Please respect copyright.PENANApuIy9wiXd2
「老婆啊……」1132Please respect copyright.PENANAjA86iqzejV
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAgehJhaOC64
「我操!」1132Please respect copyright.PENANATedDs7yhsX
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAhDo3z0ctL0
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAejZbUf7Fu0
ε٩(๑> ₃ <)۶з Σ>—(〃°ω°〃)♥ → (╭ ̄3 ̄)╭♥ σ ゚∀ ゚) ゚∀゚)σ ლ(╹ε╹ლ)
1132Please respect copyright.PENANA4LljIRfpAO
後記:
1132Please respect copyright.PENANA0jgy3A9MEE
總算把他們都湊在一起了OTZ1132Please respect copyright.PENANANB2P4alPRo
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAQOWpuG6Bk6
算是讓艾登和小倫有段小談心了吧(算嗎##1132Please respect copyright.PENANA2IjyHnAIDc
小倫被小孩連咬八口這個源由,未來會在番外提到,跟某人有關唷AWA1132Please respect copyright.PENANArYv2iHzjVt
1132Please respect copyright.PENANABVO8PWtPue
1132Please respect copyright.PENANATLyoCQ3Agu
【下篇預告】《各有話說》:艾倫親親?琥倫的過往,泰貝小談話,字數約四千多字,大概下禮拜三早上發吧。1132Please respect copyright.PENANAnrOKoUHgHr
1132Please respect copyright.PENANA5aVBdfKqof
1132Please respect copyright.PENANAe4dhOth4dK
★【凌家動物園系列】
1.花心豹吃兔計畫 — 付墨X凌小兔 (作品名:小兔不吃回頭草)1132Please respect copyright.PENANAnPq9IXNioJ
2.大貓小貓相親記 — 泰特斯X拉貝爾 (作品名:恃寵而傲嬌)1132Please respect copyright.PENANApsV27vZkIU
3.小強星人也求愛 — 艾登X席倫 (作品名:爆炸頭不要來)1132Please respect copyright.PENANAU0ueI6qeUO
1132Please respect copyright.PENANANP9pDVKxzB
歡迎追蹤噗浪和FB粉絲頁>////<1132Please respect copyright.PENANAr0lhepDYqf
1132Please respect copyright.PENANA1Fg3oAowpE
噗浪:http://www.plurk.com/sakuhyde1132Please respect copyright.PENANAzZpCm9zAyr
FB粉絲頁:https://www.facebook.com/meowbarksky1132Please respect copyright.PENANAvxRmZf3gRJ
by 喵芭渴死姬 / 02.21.2016
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