Kwamé has been here for over two hours, and has barely said anything. That has given me more than enough time to openly stare at him - and he's damn good looking. His face is perfectly chiseled, his brows perfectly arched, and his grey, almond eyes perfectly set in his warm caramel coloured face.711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqM2hMuCKXJ
He's made me soup, taken care of me, made sure that I'm alright - but he's procrastinating. A part of me knew he would, knew that he'd be reluctant to tell me. In a way, he's just as indecisive as I am. He just sits there looking at his glass in his hands, not wanting to address the very large elephants in the room.711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMKMpRsVGvW
"You know that you're going to have to talk to me sooner or later," I insist.711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5oU6Opsihv
"How about later?" he suggests as he looks at the beautifully designed green carpet spread out across the living room floor. 711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZbe7k9dKre
"Kwamé."711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1gmmreEX7G
"What?" he asks.711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7QeBGpQVbh
"Talk to me. Please."711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBNT0wk7Di5
He looks down and sighs heavily, his grey eyes glued to the floor. "I don't know what to say."711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoy3LzQxQmH
"Let's address the fact that I'm seeing you in human form for the first time," I suggest. At the moment, it is the more intriguing topic. 711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡV9a9fAap92
"Let's not talk about that. I only did it so that I could take care of you."711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡz6x8t98uta
"Kwamé, this is big," I tell him, stating the obvious. 711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvVQYaugRLz
"I know, and I hope it won't happen again. You need some friends."711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2PMd1hFDee
"How did you know that I was sick?" I ask, changing the subject. I don't want to talk about my lack of friends right now. It's never bothered me before, so I don't know why it should now. 711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡc1Y06kDAvS
"I heard you sniffling and vomiting last night, and this morning, your breathing sounded off."711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkl2QU3sVze
"Woah, wait- my breathing?" I ask, about an octave higher that my normal pitch. 711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDfeYIJHsxh
"Yeah, I hear things better than humans."711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqh2lOseQjW
"So you heard our conversation last night?"711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu4hfMVWpp9
"I could hear you talking, but I wasn't listening to the words. I wasn't paying attention. I wanted to give you privacy."711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡL6XXXjYRjP
"How kind of you," I say, surprised by his behaviour. Then again, I don't really know him, do I? Where it me, I would probably eavesdrop. No, I would definitely eavesdrop. 711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5i6ClVdEif
"Well, while I am inquisitive, I do have my limits."711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDibLb466Kl
"Well, that's good to know."711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiJiuoe5Tf1
We sit in silence for a few moments, before he clears his throat.711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh5jrKpPTRW
"So, I have a story for you."711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0o2upRIbZe
Finally.711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJXiGtYSOja
I place the now empty soup bowl on the coffee table, and look at him, sitting in the chair opposite me. He mimics my actions with his glass. I wait for him to begin. For a moment, I don't think that he'll tell me. However, something in my eyes must encourage him, because I see it in his eyes the second that he makes his decision.711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm8dZzdgoAN
He laughs without humour, and then exhales deeply.711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡONsNiU48Ba
"I was born on Saturday, July 7, 1677, to a slave mother and a white, plantation owner father. My father decided to keep me as a member of the household - not quite a son - instead of as a slave. I guess he couldn't stand the idea of having a member of his bloodline working in a field or as a house slave. He treated me with ambivalence; for my whole life, he was, at best, merely tolerant of me. The only person who ever showed me true love was my mother. When I was nineteen, my father died. He had no close relatives, but rather than let his father's plantation go to the government, he left it to his bastard half-breed son. That is all he ever saw me as, anyway." He stops to take a deep breath before continuing his story. "I, however, was overcome with the power rush of actually owning something for once in my life. He wrote it in his will to ensure my freedom, so that no one would try to take advantage of me, force me into slavery. I mistook my father's actions for love, and I forsook those who did love me. My mother, brothers, my sister, and all the other slaves... I didn't abuse them, but I'd be lying if I said that the power didn't get to my head. The problem isn't with what I did, though... It's with what I didn't do. I didn't free them."711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡidOpzYcC7V
"So when you died...?" I ask, trailing off. 711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvmc57JwqZe
"I died at age twenty six, a few days before my twenty seventh birthday. Pneumonia."711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxylL70sHrG
"Your mother?" I push, although I can take a pretty good guess as to what happened. 711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡufCf3Ctkuz
"I didn't write a will, and I had no heirs, so when I died, she remained a slave, and the plantation went to the government. I could have helped her, helped them, helped all of them... but I was so damn selfish."711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1ZDZkAHYTB
Damn. I don't know what I was expecting, but it sure as hell wasn't that.711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjf6jky1HhU
"So, you see, I'm a monster," he tells me with a painful smile on his face. I can see the hurt and anger deep in his eyes. Anger directed inwards, at himself. 711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcsjmPEMzpb
"No, you're not," I reassure him. "Formerly an asshole, maybe. But from what I've seen, you're not a monster."711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡszWwNvZUnU
"So why have I been damned to this for eternity?" Despise the obvious feelings that can be read on his face, his voice is monotonous, devoid of any emotion. 711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr6V0n0XiZG
He has a good point.711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGYQTPBdcxu
"Maybe, it is you," I tell him. "Maybe, it's a result of the way that you saw yourself when you were dying. How did you feel? What did you feel?" I ask him.711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgp352heiZv
He looks into my eyes, and then looks down, biting his lip, before letting out a huge sigh.711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ10OUTfKMhM
"Regret. Regret and self-loathing. I hated myself for not loving my family while I was alive. I called for a lawyer to get my will in place, but when he arrived, I was too far gone."711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKyM0P8QlBR
Can you ever... move on?" I ask him.711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxX7nk2rnRi
He chuckles softly.711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjNElNyRfkE
"No. I'm stuck like this forever."711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg6UK7ieybC
"If you can be human, why is it so bad?"711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqm6q5ZNwBO
"Because we always want to go back to being an animal. There's always that urge to be what you're meant to be- a murderous bull."711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡonSphaHlse
"Murderous?"711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8Nh6GAdFLO
"Yes. It makes you angry. Makes you want to kill, feed off of the fear of others, feel some kind of power and control when you've been powerless for so long." While he's talking, he stared into my eyes with great determination - trying to convince me that he is a monster.711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡc4S2C6FRLD
"Have you ever done that?"711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmkgt66pms8
"Once. He was my enemy."711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh5GQxcJDSq
"Oh."711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ95C4g8eSBp
I can tell that there's more to the story, but he leaves it at that, probably in an attempt to scare me.711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡelhU0pB53D
"I like you, Kwamé," I tell him. "And you don't scare me."711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwLVoHGYZ6x
"I should."711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKoxL0OdqZs
"But you don't." Truthfully, I see no reason to fear him. He thinks he's worse than he really is. Consumed by guilt, he's become this person filled with self hatred and self loathing, convinced that he's an evil entity.711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡimU3r8JAKh
I don't believe that that is true. He needs to give himself another chance.711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoIbpg4Tjpk
But if I am to tell him that... then I also need to be forgiving. I need to give my mother another chance.711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB10d1krSJf
"Tell you what - how about we both learn forgiveness? You try to forgive yourself, and I try to forgive my mother. Starting now."711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5lULoPDXjN
"You'll give her another chance?" he asks hopefully. 711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDFdFjuIy6t
"If you do the same for yourself. I'll meet with her soon."711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2qFE6fKHKM
Looking rather torn, he looks into my eyes as if searching deep into my soul for an alternative. When he finds none, he lets out a deep sigh.711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡslyZcwmxXF
"Fine. But I'm only doing this for your mother."711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4c1PnDp21e
I show my gratitude with a large smile stretching from ear to ear. As I look at him sitting there, unsure as ever, I know that I won't regret this decision. 711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUfaRA9dtTo
***711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMQfUwh74uL
School has become one of the most boring, mundane things that I have ever experienced. Perhaps it's due to the supernatural that has filled my life in every other aspect. Still, I'm finding it increasingly difficult to concentrate in lab sessions, which is never a good thing. Today, though... today, I have a plan. 711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIdiHVJMveJ
After sneaking past a sleeping Kwamé laying on my couch - I didn't even know that he slept - I planned on going to do some research. The main library hosts an extensive collection of books, some of which must be on Jamaican folklore. I came up with this plan the last time I spoke to Kwamé, actually. I decided that I would try to find out as much as possible on the topic. However, as we all know, things don't always turn out the way we want. Or that's what I'm hearing now, since I've never had this problem before. 711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTJI2ebVqzr
"No ID, no entrance," the guard outside of the library says to me. The fact that I'm sick only makes me more irritable. I don't know if she can tell I that I'm seething, but she leans back in her seat, moving away from me. Of course, I would have to leave my ID at home today of all days. Of course.711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡilqGtH0Ldc
"Look, I'll give you my ID number," I try to bargain, sniffling a few times. "620114-"711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRRzVibDn35
"No," she insists, "I need the actual ID."711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuSAjqwaWco
So of course, my brilliant plan falls through.711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlwDILG2jG1
Instead of having a library of books available to me, all I have is the internet. Which is still pretty good. Sitting on the library steps in my oversized sweater, I pull out my iPad and type in Rolling Calf in the search engine... only to find nothing, because unsurprisingly, the WiFi is being a bitch and a half. I grind my teeth so hard, it feels as if they could crush diamonds. Exhaling steadily, I agree with myself that I will continue my search once I get home.711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAbHBhYHBKm
This seamed like a better idea in my head, because once I reach home, and into my room with Kwamé in the shower outside (not the en suite one) the only things that pop up are things that I already know. Some of it I suspect to be utter rubbish, for example, throwing things on the ground for a rolling calf to count, and then running away. I can hardly imagine Kwamé stopping to count rice grains while his "victim" escapes, or getting confused at an intersection*. In terms of the river mumma, I knew this already, except for one small detail:711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡM63UdSCs8f
During the times of slavery, sacrifices would be made to the river mumma during a drought, or when someone wanted to cross the river. The fish in that area would not be eaten, because they were thought to be her children. 711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAFiTBwAFdZ
Paraphrasing a bit, but that's basically what it says. 711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqpAY4fnCJT
I was aware of the part where the fish were her children, but the rest sounds like utter bullcrap. Then again, isn't anything possible at this point in time? 711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGZJyPGt3Az
Duppies: been there, done that. 711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq5a5hwXUqY
However, there's one thing there that I don't hear about every day, even though I know about it: Ol' Higue. Ol' Higue... I remember read a poem about her for my CSEC* Literature exam. The creature is an old witch who sheds her skin and takes the form of what some say to be an owl, and what others say to be a ball of light - personally, I think that owl is more plausible, but who the hell knows anymore - and preys on people in their sleep, especially babies. Kind of like a vampire. If salt is placed on her skin she will not be able to put it back on, which will make her vulnerable. If you throw rice on the ground - why are we so obsessed with rice? - she will have to count it. This was thought to be an explanation to grieving mothers for SIDS, but knowing what I know now, it's probably true. 711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbQrPa1DTuS
But none of this helps me, since I already know most of it. 711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBU7N7djHJX
Sighing, I go to my bookshelf and pull out my "World of Poetry" book to look for clues. I sit and skim through the poems, some of which I was assigned. 711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4XA6KyA4nX
"Ol' Higue... 'Le loupgarou'..." I stop dead when I spot a poem that I've never read before. 711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCesWhZFaLc
My Mother's Sea Chanty. 711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFRhRh9oOTt
It's a poem about a woman who's mother is a mermaid... in the sea. 711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLiWhl2Cvc2
With a huff of frustration, I slam the book closed. 711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGXkYmhgSLH
Deciding to take a different approach, I research Obeah spells, abandoning my quest to explain Kwamé for the time being. It is rather odd to be researching something that scares the crap out of you, just for the sake of understanding yourself. In a way, it kind of means that you're scared of yourself. Depressing, really. 711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRGftoeDcGa
I come across an anti bad luck charm, something that I might need soon if I continue on this trajectory. It looks too simple, though, reminding me of a Harry Potter spell, like "Expecto Patronum". Still, I screenshot it, and continue my search. 711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoZfizT1HRY
It is then that I find something that is rather frightening. 711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgDgQnbU1co
I come across a website that offers obeah spells, and says that payment is not needed until results are seen. 711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpgQBV5brCP
Now although I have always believed in obeah, I also know that many people who claim to perform "obeah" are scammers, preying on uneducated families with children who have mental illnesses or seizure disorders. It is a common misconception among many Jamaicans that seizures are caused by demon possession. But this... this is as real as it can possibly get. 711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAE8p2gr23k
Quickly, I exit the website, as if something is going to jump out the screen at me. I'm frightened, I can't deny it. If I did, my pulse rate and breathing would definitely give me away. But other than fear, there's something else... 711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiDr4vEVSvu
Excitement. 711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjuJebzyFtE
Oh dear God, Nya. You're in for a rough ride, aren't you?711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ85wwcTXr1r
And for once, I completely agree with my inner voice, no indecisiveness, just acceptance. 711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7tk9wKIobs
***711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDaM85wlu7I
A/N711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOxS46Mh5r6
711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrfQjQgX574
I actually found a website that said that 😅711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnTJC8FaMQj
Also, the thing about an intersection: supposedly, if you go to an intersection, the rolling calf will get confused. They are also afraid of being beaten by a whip (some say specifically a tarred whip in the left hand). They supposedly carry a chain and / or a bell, so you can hear them approaching, but I didn't want Kwamé to have that. 711Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPiUIGIYyXu
*CSEC: Caribbean Secondary Examination Certificate.
ns3.133.141.1da2
