16Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbuMzJYmJKG
Anderson sat in a chair in a dark, deep room, his mind16Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgQQ9APekbE
repeating, "What did I say?" His father lay there, mouth open, hands16Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡraczm5xvIk
icy cold. He stared at him as if he were bound to a chair with the tag16Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtzK7ZlCxOm
"grief," pierced by the blade of regret. His heart pounded in his16Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡokgugIJ6yc
chest.
Oh no. I'm fatherless.
He knew that God was his Father, but that fact did not16Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHstn70QVPW
comfort him.
"If God is so loving, why did He allow me to see my16Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtdtsWA7jaO
father die?" he grumbled. "Well. there goes my dad."
His father had been more than a parent; he had been his16Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfY30ZfYvQg
teacher and mentor. Now, all of that was lost. He felt broken, unable to16Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYApKawhiJD
envision a future.
He yelled to God, his voice trembling with pain. "Why16Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjvHixHEzDA
did You leave me? I hate You—I don't love You. Why didn't You save him? God,16Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxjtdbQG6ki
I'm trapped in Your silence. Please, speak to me! Are You even there? God.16Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUl48mhagDJ
hello? Come on! Where are You?"
He needed to run. He needed to disappear. The weight of16Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3XGGnqdjB5
grief was overwhelming.
"You are so mighty. but I do not believe in You."
Let me die. Just let me go.
Tears blurred his vision as he clenched his fists.16Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRjTmOijRCA
"God, are You even hearing me? Come on!"
He felt like he'd been hit by a two-million-ton truck—like16Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpKVPU6ZPVG
a three-trillion-ton building had crashed down on him, annihilating his soul16Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvpos7W62pq
and leaving him with nothing.
The hurting hurt. The anger frightened him. He was afraid16Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPYcS7OmPIe
to speak it because he believed that to do so would dishonor his father's name,16Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCgay87CsVN
but at the same time, he could not ignore it.
When they carted off his dad, he remembered his dad telling16Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdgGUjTviRQ
him: "This is not your fault."
His dad no longer reassured him. But. he could still sense16Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUiroxUgOD2
something—a presence.
Was it his father? Or was it God? And if it was God, why16Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5JyxZ7vcTf
had He stayed? Why would He still love him after all he had just said?
He recalled God telling him that everything would be okay,
he was not sure if16Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG6BDHZZqep
God was real.
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ns18.219.247.127da2
