Here I am again, with my great plans to make my downfall a piece of entertainment. The queen of unfunny jokes strikes again I guess. But before we all get sad about my misserable ideas, let's take a moment to talk about the next step I took to world domination:67Please respect copyright.PENANAQCL3M2nEuD
Another book with my cover on it is out! That bring the total to a three (if I don't count the ones I did for less proffecional published stuff) In this rate I will surely take over the world! Okay, probably not. However I still get to watch my covers on other peoples bookstagram accounts and that's kinda cool.67Please respect copyright.PENANAcTqK94vgZQ
67Please respect copyright.PENANAZF3F38b7Q8
That being said, my health is activly trying to sabotage further progress. I wanted to stop it by killing it, but given the aditional cassualties that would result in, I had to let it go. So for now it's still making my body a significant worse place to live in. Seriously, I've now tiny black spots dancing in front of my eyes and have been crazy dizzy at random moments. It's kinda scary, but I think I'll be okay. It's not like the doctor seemed worried last time we chatted.67Please respect copyright.PENANAisERPweUzw
67Please respect copyright.PENANAeDWW7dQMJ6
It's so weird. I don't want to die, but somedays I just want te sabotage to succeed and my body to selfdistruct. At least that way what I am feeling is real. Maybe then people will listen. However I always have to remind myself. It's not that people won't listen. It's more that I don't talk, because I don't feel like they can help me.67Please respect copyright.PENANAV6lvEJXda1
67Please respect copyright.PENANAhb42vQpmNQ
I really need therapy I guess... well what's new? Oh yeah, I almost finished my book. If this health thing doesn't spin further out of control I will continue to translate it soon. And honestly I don't think it will.67Please respect copyright.PENANAuiJzTJtvnJ
67Please respect copyright.PENANAtwHOoRexA8
The thing with falling ill is that in my case it's not like the books described it. Like action packed scenes full with sirens and near death... that's at least a cool story to tell. For me it just goes really, really, really slow. I'm not even dying, I'm just not living anymore either. It's kinda annoying. If I have to go through this, at least make it cool or so.
Just a (not so) little note to end on: I know dying is very serious and not cool. I don't mean to make fun of anyone going through illness themselves or with a loved one. This is just me trying to progress the mess that's my own brain.67Please respect copyright.PENANAKN3QdMLhOk
67Please respect copyright.PENANA264QlJthDh
If you're dealing with suicidal thoughts, there's help out there. There's no shame in seeking therapy (just like I am doing). There's not such a thing as not bad enough. You deserve to be happy.