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Claire quickly made her way home, the incident with Philip already forgotten. It was already late in the afternoon and mama would be livid if she didn't get her supper ready on time.
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They lived in the worst part of town where the trailer park, white trash was dirt poor and lived off lousy incomesthat were garnered in nefarious and terrifying ways. It was a scary, crime ridden place to live in but Claire wasn't afraid. She'd grown up around these parts. That however, didn't mean she was stupid. You had to have eyes on the back of your head and always keep your head down otherwise you'd be taken out just like that. There was always a story in the local newspaper about a girl found raped or dead, unfortunately it was usually both. Claire had even witnessed a stabbing once, it had been a ghastly thing to experience. The man had probably died. She hadn't stayed long enough to find out.
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She arrived home with little time to spare. In truth, it was more of a shack than a house. It was ancient and severely dilapidated, it looked as though it would fall apart at any moment. She knew it wouldn't, well it hadn't so far. The structure was steadier than it seemed and that was good enough for her. It was surrounded by other similar shacks and trailers that housed countless druggies, dope dealers and prostitutes.
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The shack was made up of three rooms which thankfully included a bathroom, others weren't so lucky. Mama used one as her bedroom and she used the other. The biggest room was used as a kitchen and a living room. She walked inside and briefly looked around and felt the usual despair that came over her every time she came home threaten to overwhelm her.
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The furniture consisted of odd bits and pieces her mama had stolen or found and brought home. The couch was so ragged and old that no matter how much she'd tried to clean it she had never been able remove all the dirt and grime that stuck to it like glue. There was an old TV set that had stopped working years ago that her mama stubbornly refused to part with. Claire couldn't understand why she wouldn't just throw the useless thing away. Dirty, torn curtains covered even dirtier windows. Their kitchen was made up of a tiny wooden table with a two plate stove on it and two chairs. There was a fridge next to it that barely got cold anymore.
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Claire physically shook off the dark feelings of hopelessness that made her cold inside and went into her bedroom. It had a single bed, a white chipped drawer in which she kept her clothes in and a small work desk. She quickly changed into a pair of old, threadbare jeans and a t-shirt. She went back into the kitchen and starting making mac and cheese for supper. As she finished cooking her mama walked in with a thick set, heavy man right behind her. They were laughing obnoxiously, sloppily kissing and drinking booze all at the same time. If Claire hadn't been so grossed out she would have given them points for efficient multitasking.
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The man, whose age was indiscernible looked like a filthy, homeless bum who hadn't had a shower in ages. He saw her and immediately froze, unashamedly ogling her. His smile was as nauseating as his crooked teeth which were stained a nasty brown/yellow colour that was most likely caused by tobacco, "A fine young thing ain't ya girly." He said and the look in his eyes made Claire shift uncomfortably as she mentally chided herself. She usually made sure she locked herself in her room long before her mama came home so as to avoid any unpleasant scenes with her male company. Her mama scornfully looked at her, "Pay her no mind Billy." She said and brazenly stroked his bulging manhood, "You're here to have fun with me. I’ll show you a good time, the best you’ve ever had.” She said seductively and brought his face towards hers and kissed him passionately. He responded in kind. Roughly groping her and shoving his tongue inside her mother’s mouth, conveniently forgetting all about Claire. Who looked on in revulsion as her mama led him to her room.
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After they left she rushed to her own bedroom and quickly locked the door. She sat by the desk and switched on the cheap reading lamp. She’d bought it at a garage sale last year, because the curtains in her room where so heavy they blocked out the sunlight. She instantly got busy with her math homework. She didn't particularly like math but she'd do almost anything to drown out the sickening, animal sounds that came from the other room. After about fifteen or so minutes there was an abrupt silence and Claire let out a sigh of relief. As loud as her mama and her partners were, she was immensely glad that their dealings didn't last very long otherwise she didn't know how she could ever bear it.
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Claire soldiered on and finished her homework. She wasn't the smartest person in the world but she tried real hard to make sure she did well enough in school. She was convinced that passing was the only way she was ever going to be able to leave Fairview. She often fantasized about getting a scholarship and leaving town. She didn't care what the scholarship would be for or where she'd end up going so long as it was far, far away from home and her miserable life. As soon as she got the chance, she'd hightail it outta there and go somewhere where no one knew her or her mother. She would have her own nice, clean home and be treated with respect and common decency by everyone. Claire's yearning was so strong that she could have sworn she felt it physically as she let herself get carried away into her wonderful daydream.
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A soft thud roused her from her sweet fantasy. She tsked in annoyance, got up and looked out the window and was surprised to discover that it was already dark outside. She pressed her ear to the wall, listened carefully and heard deep snores coming from the other room. Her mama usually passed out after drinking the whole day, so at least Claire could get some peace and quiet for a few hours. She checked her clock, it was already half seven. Her stomach rumbled and she remembered that she hadn't had any supper yet. She quietly made her way to the kitchen and got herself a plate of cold mac and cheese and a glass of water then quickly made her way back to her room.
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She ate and finished the bland food and then got settled for the night. Claire changed into her old cotton night dress and got into bed. All her clothes and blankets were old but she always made sure they were clean. To pass the time she usually read. She'd loved reading since she'd been a little girl and she usually read anything she could get her hands on. History, art, psychology anything at all but she mostly enjoyed novels. She loved a good adventure story but didn't mind a romantic one once in a while. Although, she was probably too much of a cynic to believe in that kind of stuff. Life was too dark and depressing to believe in such unattainable things as love. But it sure seemed real nice. A fairytale happy ending didn't seem bad at all. Too bad it wasn't grounded in reality.
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She'd joined the public library when she was eleven and had been ecstatic to discover that she could borrow some books and read them in the privacy of her room. She got her latest read which was a psychological thriller. As soon as she started reading she was immediately lost in the story and exciting characters. A few hours later she began having a had time keeping her eyes open. She hated to stop because she'd been enjoying the story too much but what good was it if she could no longer concentrate on what she was reading. She decided it was time to sleep and got up to check and make sure that the door was securely locked. Satisfied that it was she switched off the light and got into bed. She instantly fell into a dark, dreamless sleep.
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At first she thought it was a terrible nightmare when she felt a vice like grip on her neck. It cut off her air supply and made it difficult to breathe. It was the putrid smell of body order that hit her senses hard and alerted her that she wasn't dreaming at all. She woke up with a start as the perpetrator heavily mounted her and clumsily fumbled with her nightdress. With her heart nearly beating right out of her chest and a sickening fear prickling her spine she tried to scream but a grimy hand painfully covered her mouth. "Be a good little girl and shut your mouth." the words were issued in a low hiss right above her ear, "We don't want ya mama waking up and ruining our fun, now do we?"
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She whimpered as salty tears flowed down her cheeks. She thrashed around violently, trying to loosen his death like grip on her. Using all of her strength she aggressively kicked her legs and used her hands to punch him anywhere she could reach. The blows were pathetically ineffective as he was much stronger and bigger than her. He just used one hand to secure both her hands above her head and used his legs to subdue hers. "There, there now. Just relax, I won't hurt ya. I'll be real good see ... you'll like it. I know you will. Just like ya greedy mama did." He whispered in a slurred voice and licked her cheek with his tongue and Claire convulsed in repulsion. She was going to get rapped and there nothing she could do about it. The thought made her feel so sick with fear that she almost blacked out.
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But when she felt him move his hand between their bodies and unzip his pants she was swept up in a sudden burst of renewed energy. With adrenaline pumping through her veins she brutally bit the hand over her mouth and drew out blood. He yelped in pain and shock and the hold on her hands slacked. She used the distraction to reach beneath her pillow and grabbed the can of pepper spray she kept hidden there in case something like this occurred. She sprayed it in his eyes and he jumped off her as if he'd been bitten by a snake. He screamed in pain and discomfort, writhing on the floor while crying, "You bitch, I'll kill you. I'll kill you, you stupid bitch." She immediately got up, switched on the light and opened the door. She stood in the hallway watching him while she tried to take deep breaths to calm herself down.
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Her mama came out of her room and into Claire's to see what all the commotion was about. She was still wearing the same clothes she'd been wearing earlier, a tiny red mini skirt and an even tinnier top. A thick layer of distasteful makeup covered her entire face although it was now smudged beyond repair and her bright red hair was sticking out at odd angles. She looked annoyed because she had been woken up, her bloodshot eyes were heavy with sleep and intoxication. She clutched her head and demanded in an angry voice, "What's all the screaming about huh?"
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The man answered in quick breaths while still on the floor vigorously rubbing his eyes, "Noma Jean, your girl has made me blind with that shit she sprayed in my eyes. Fuck ... I can't see no more." He screeched, "Damn stupid bitch." Claire remained standing outside the room still trying to catch her breath and still her trembling body. Her mama looked at her and studied her for a second before she went into the room and grabbed the man by the collar, "Serves you right you dumb son of a bitch. What were you doing in there huh? I told you to stay the hell away from her. Get your lousy ass outta here." She said while half dragging him into the living room. She then opened the door and shoved him out. Noma Jean locked the door and went straight into her bedroom without a single word or glance at Claire.
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Claire went back into her bedroom and discovered the hair pin that had been used to pick the lock into her room. She thought grimly about what might have happened to her and she shook again with fright. She took the pin and set it on the table and locked the door again. She got into bed and cried herself to sleep like she had all the other times in the past when something like this had happened.
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