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「去哪？」358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxD36Ld72cT
358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBllYzesdLw
「急事。」358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhFROCdxtA5
358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡl3sJlKlFD3
「你不吃晚餐？」358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDerzzz5go6
358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJFBju9xUfG
我沒應答，逕自出門。358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡz2LomdRS6l
358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZVYHETlbcn
冬夜六時。厚衣下的溫暖身軀與袒露的臉和手，不協調感令我忐忑不安。358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡioVeKMhlPr
358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNDbnh1330X
難以言喻的鬱悶。358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGzOZK5AsQw
358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZaR2ywMjNa
長嘆。358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvkVdRNSAZ4
358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡO6aHyKUGuq
「紅萬。」我邊說邊掏出八達通。358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZP8hBx8F0W
358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡC5n2baV0pu
店員爽快從身後陳列架取來貨品，熟練在收銀機屏幕上點點按按，然後給我贈品——果汁味肉乾三小包。我有意無意瞄了瞄她的臉。大眾臉，過目即忘。358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡk8Ucnw6I2l
358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ1F7zuvE7x
「不需要贈品？」她驀地抬眼，與我眼神對上。是發現我的無禮目光嗎？358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡejaHXTeUg4
358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlybxkBxDh5
「我……錯認是口香糖。」我慌忙編個爛藉口，連忙接過香菸和肉乾。358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCH3iJZODjP
358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjvadixvsPF
她假笑，沒再搭理我，拿起抹布四處抹。358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEDJoMmEGkz
358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3NAr3r5x6U
我走出光線充足的便利店，重踏漆黑夜空下的大街。358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCRrfMCIym0
358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8CQZfXsBnW
另一種不協調。另一種忐忑，另一種不安。358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPA4WS4HISd
358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2qlzHW6mxi
櫥窗五光十色，路人絡繹不絕。人潮亂中有序，不約而同在紅色燈號前止住，然後在綠色燈號亮起當刻同時邁步。一致得神奇，一致得可怕。並肩而行的男男女女在過路以後分道揚鑣，不為曾經的遇見生起任何印象或猶豫。358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWXOqeNyC2R
358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDQsiQSBQ6Y
心血來潮，我莫名其妙拐到小巷去。358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡM2KyNg1nQc
358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ02EGS5BySE
污水，雜物，廚餘，鼠餌，坑渠。358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYtMA5R8IUO
358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYDHkBbb6C5
髒，亂，腐，毒，臭。358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHt1lFLwhXm
358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpDRNf35OgU
為何要到這種地方來？不是捷徑，不知盡頭何處，不懷目的……358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡST7ytVl4OM
358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡs2Xw6INmPY
小巷盡處是另一小巷，盡頭以後是另一開始。路接路，走又走。不停前行，像是正在找出口；絕不回頭，像是不打算找到真正出口。358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0IkpFUqMPs
358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzsJsYFqSQX
厭煩日常走過的路，不欲重覆。若問想要到甚麼地方去，其實我沒有答案。很奇妙。眼下似乎有很多選擇，實質一切已成定局。那是大街，這是小巷。大街在明，小巷在暗。大街繁華，小巷冷清。358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6VCSgD2efe
358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhETyjN4Eyu
註定的。358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmCW4hEXGhK
358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7b7pimQQYX
冷清小巷盡頭會有好東西麼？我不相信，亦不願輕言不相信。358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9gK26f8fKB
358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ0EztGFC2l
汪——汪——嗚——拐角傳來狗隻悲鳴。358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0exreR69wJ
358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLQHu0xi6Sk
停步。猶疑。358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNpJ1sPBGJf
358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpf1LEZ8gVr
惻隱？慈悲？然後呢？根本沒有然後，因為我自顧不暇。358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKzgC3wmRYe
358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzCb7Xnj7G8
轉身。358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXSPYr6Cryq
358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqFqlyHEp6D
汪——汪——嗚——拐角狗隻再次悲鳴。358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnoe5e9HYhu
358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5sMv9W2f1F
我回身走去。358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvTyGJb8FmY
358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi7QdUCJzfH
惻隱？慈悲？不，好奇罷。358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMHnba8Dgtp
358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7fWJtkellA
把小狗抱入懷內。358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp3oX4MkXXt
358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡl6YFWcTK7U
「暖和沒？」我傻傻自語——嘴巴極需要說話理由。358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡolmmkIkXGf
358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXbmwjx2niZ
陣風從後疾過，寒意夾雜水氣與鹹香。358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi05b7b1QtY
358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGM1sRWXogj
海風？海濱公園步道？358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7KhrSJoxjH
358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK8sU7I6QgU
「一起散步去吧。」我沒期望小狗會回答，但我需要溜達原因。358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMVX39N5khI
358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZRWO4y3MVn
多拐兩個彎，我帶著小狗在兩幢高樓之間走出來，恰巧看見銀月自海平面升起。清澄，純淨，圓滿。358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzRVYVnSECp
358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJpb3tKjRRc
「看！這是月亮。」我指天示意小狗往上望去。358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6Nz17KAJcM
358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbe8FHtLu3Q
汪——牠回答，但沒有依指示抬頭。358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE2W8GuSc7r
358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHmrj5BUMWl
「找個好地方坐坐吧！」為免小狗中途跑掉，我微微拉下外套拉鏈，把小狗往內塞。牠沒反抗，甚至懂得稍為伸出頭部，方便呼吸和看風景。我真慶幸剛才沒有對牠視若無睹：「乖。」358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhT6UZ5x292
358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡR05PbJ4pSp
銀月清冷，步道冷清，寧靜。心跳規律，呼吸有序，乏味。回憶很多，未知更多，迷惘。358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoQlyjIxGDc
358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyUQ8B9EyPV
「我上一次來海濱公園是小學畢業後的那個暑假。與幾個特別要好的男生相約到來踩roller，跌了幾跤，膝蓋流血。明明怕血，明明怕痛，偏偏為保面子而強說無事，硬撐一整天。結果翌日膝蓋腫黑大片，痛得要命，不得不到醫院求醫。結果在醫院留醫足足兩個月，九月中才可到新學校上課。」我在路邊長椅坐下，拆開一包贈品肉乾給小狗充飢，報答牠聽我發牢騷。358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGNMsmB0INH
358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLgG0v6nNn4
「留醫期間，我生氣朋友們不來探望我，打算出院後臭罵他們一頓。出院後，我忙於學校課業，忘記致電他們，然後順理成章忘記他們。當我再次想起他們，已是高中畢業的事。」我點菸，一吸一呼，虛假短暫的舒爽。「其實沒甚麼大不了，無需要記在腦袋裡。但事情就是發生過，不是說忘記就可以忘記。」358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDm0GGFoBCb
358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡppAQVX1DvS
記憶零碎，思路紊亂。嘴巴想要表達更多，無奈腦袋運轉不來，沒能將感受化為言語……算了吧。反正小狗根本沒興趣聽下去。358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ5GIbDzlQe
358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUVWslcc6IS
「你似乎對肉乾比較有興趣。」我又拆開一包肉乾予牠。牠吃得津津有味，舌頭不時舔舔嘴邊，甚至舔到小小鼻頭。358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqia41Te8Wc
358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZySx5FLkjU
我笑，笑牠傻氣可愛。358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi3TcqsxWpX
358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbY4nBjHx0h
又吸一口虛假短暫的舒爽。又呼一口難以言喻的鬱悶。358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhWMeJWasCd
358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhM6fpQSvkp
鬱悶何來？358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDJs9ZYwsoa
358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ011UNgEXkL
學業壓力？愛情煩惱？家庭不和？358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡepyUogpbfy
358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡc5uHVzeUbo
也許統統都是，也許統統不是。358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjonAcJk40C
358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsLYmzOCcZE
多件零星不順心瑣碎事湊在一起成為一股無法消弭的鬱悶。358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡurXEXfOJts
358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡucIFfAOi5p
有如一根經過繁複工序生產的香菸。358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYwE5npJZ72
358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoOjRinvQUM
有如一塊由豬肉、糖、鹽、增味劑、醬油、香辛料、護色劑、色素組成的肉乾。358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnG86DRmiLB
358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfNwaLiMhP1
「好吃吧。」我又拆開一包肉乾。趁小狗專心咬嚼，我彈走菸屁股，將牠從懷裡抽出，來個深深擁抱。358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYscBikyxMr
358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpVnenxIdHP
然後呢？根本沒有然後。358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3juVQ2Xc9x
358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡO2nedVub4n
我輕輕放下小狗，動身邁步離開。358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQgLdwog0o8
358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKeJbnMhrE1
正如牠知道我身上沒有更多肉乾，自然而然不會跟上來。358Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ9TOdNhduJ
註：此篇另收錄於短篇小說集《雜念集》
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