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「去哪？」302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhjKApwlvyn
302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrrEWfJ5Ctu
「急事。」302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡykHMGrIsrl
302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFc6pkf2HdE
「你不吃晚餐？」302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ83b1Tu2Kyd
302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWkScB8wkuG
我沒應答，逕自出門。302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqb3aDhoC2r
302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjlt1NXXm1O
冬夜六時。厚衣下的溫暖身軀與袒露的臉和手，不協調感令我忐忑不安。302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwtNVOM1qec
302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGWToa74uXK
難以言喻的鬱悶。302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ81TWojhsps
302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUC4EN0NQnq
長嘆。302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvqexUEieLh
302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlT78t2ktg7
「紅萬。」我邊說邊掏出八達通。302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb1g0f2sKKZ
302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZE0zxglDbN
店員爽快從身後陳列架取來貨品，熟練在收銀機屏幕上點點按按，然後給我贈品——果汁味肉乾三小包。我有意無意瞄了瞄她的臉。大眾臉，過目即忘。302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9B6VVYPyzo
302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXNeyPAq1eP
「不需要贈品？」她驀地抬眼，與我眼神對上。是發現我的無禮目光嗎？302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRcHR1DGm9h
302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQwjOptJUaZ
「我……錯認是口香糖。」我慌忙編個爛藉口，連忙接過香菸和肉乾。302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZLrJ3KEXVx
302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzcMZIOixsX
她假笑，沒再搭理我，拿起抹布四處抹。302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXBBElcw9Pd
302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1VvXStnK72
我走出光線充足的便利店，重踏漆黑夜空下的大街。302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlTj68AF2FX
302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfqh6hdq92V
另一種不協調。另一種忐忑，另一種不安。302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSJSn7ldTQv
302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjTPS4W3GRJ
櫥窗五光十色，路人絡繹不絕。人潮亂中有序，不約而同在紅色燈號前止住，然後在綠色燈號亮起當刻同時邁步。一致得神奇，一致得可怕。並肩而行的男男女女在過路以後分道揚鑣，不為曾經的遇見生起任何印象或猶豫。302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkgvCCwR5Ov
302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ96rJKkB4JJ
心血來潮，我莫名其妙拐到小巷去。302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIQNGPRviXR
302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfJBYdhoaCr
污水，雜物，廚餘，鼠餌，坑渠。302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdYBVGgibnX
302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡM2eCTmRPOU
髒，亂，腐，毒，臭。302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcfb4B9AxQa
302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡblaUATX4kN
為何要到這種地方來？不是捷徑，不知盡頭何處，不懷目的……302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPXjttxaGeJ
302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiKdGam13ko
小巷盡處是另一小巷，盡頭以後是另一開始。路接路，走又走。不停前行，像是正在找出口；絕不回頭，像是不打算找到真正出口。302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkJ87VKgSbW
302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE0lebN1ffP
厭煩日常走過的路，不欲重覆。若問想要到甚麼地方去，其實我沒有答案。很奇妙。眼下似乎有很多選擇，實質一切已成定局。那是大街，這是小巷。大街在明，小巷在暗。大街繁華，小巷冷清。302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf2NqWgIUTO
302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRexyzVm0Vk
註定的。302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkQ5vHGd2Yo
302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeYfamVyBcp
冷清小巷盡頭會有好東西麼？我不相信，亦不願輕言不相信。302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqAd9mASk0Q
302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtgwAssnon9
汪——汪——嗚——拐角傳來狗隻悲鳴。302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB3huZ47FCR
302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡS2ebfqPKqr
停步。猶疑。302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuu5siDpjNO
302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAMe12fg8Kf
惻隱？慈悲？然後呢？根本沒有然後，因為我自顧不暇。302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHqBGycQMIO
302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuWdiimEUZH
轉身。302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvwVlqDMo1U
302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvPMFMF7VUR
汪——汪——嗚——拐角狗隻再次悲鳴。302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡI8AjM0v9ky
302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiHc7Lxdfhn
我回身走去。302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1jRVxdDc9B
302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDHD1Oao11R
惻隱？慈悲？不，好奇罷。302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTG6jyyoIm3
302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyCogrSRfxs
把小狗抱入懷內。302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBIvr7Xd3G6
302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEFkkM4mFP4
「暖和沒？」我傻傻自語——嘴巴極需要說話理由。302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeKk3NZrRIP
302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiQ8K4wJ3a6
陣風從後疾過，寒意夾雜水氣與鹹香。302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcJt1p3R2xj
302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvepQBFCflW
海風？海濱公園步道？302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXYU3A9XY5w
302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJaFbmkBFo0
「一起散步去吧。」我沒期望小狗會回答，但我需要溜達原因。302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWMMYoCh7QP
302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTcxpU5N4ec
多拐兩個彎，我帶著小狗在兩幢高樓之間走出來，恰巧看見銀月自海平面升起。清澄，純淨，圓滿。302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiiNQbyHjk0
302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdrVQyuuRI9
「看！這是月亮。」我指天示意小狗往上望去。302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWYgtdTclRR
302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNrN893bWR7
汪——牠回答，但沒有依指示抬頭。302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8z4oRcGLs1
302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAKzrytLujo
「找個好地方坐坐吧！」為免小狗中途跑掉，我微微拉下外套拉鏈，把小狗往內塞。牠沒反抗，甚至懂得稍為伸出頭部，方便呼吸和看風景。我真慶幸剛才沒有對牠視若無睹：「乖。」302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4Zx4wO5xx7
302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKe62O2wnGA
銀月清冷，步道冷清，寧靜。心跳規律，呼吸有序，乏味。回憶很多，未知更多，迷惘。302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡO8FW9PJkwS
302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx2uuCLj0mn
「我上一次來海濱公園是小學畢業後的那個暑假。與幾個特別要好的男生相約到來踩roller，跌了幾跤，膝蓋流血。明明怕血，明明怕痛，偏偏為保面子而強說無事，硬撐一整天。結果翌日膝蓋腫黑大片，痛得要命，不得不到醫院求醫。結果在醫院留醫足足兩個月，九月中才可到新學校上課。」我在路邊長椅坐下，拆開一包贈品肉乾給小狗充飢，報答牠聽我發牢騷。302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIiJ4z9q0mX
302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4wp4FeSpbz
「留醫期間，我生氣朋友們不來探望我，打算出院後臭罵他們一頓。出院後，我忙於學校課業，忘記致電他們，然後順理成章忘記他們。當我再次想起他們，已是高中畢業的事。」我點菸，一吸一呼，虛假短暫的舒爽。「其實沒甚麼大不了，無需要記在腦袋裡。但事情就是發生過，不是說忘記就可以忘記。」302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2CxIouHqCp
302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRly8DUpoCz
記憶零碎，思路紊亂。嘴巴想要表達更多，無奈腦袋運轉不來，沒能將感受化為言語……算了吧。反正小狗根本沒興趣聽下去。302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡY6EsPdjrCl
302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCYmwFc7xVL
「你似乎對肉乾比較有興趣。」我又拆開一包肉乾予牠。牠吃得津津有味，舌頭不時舔舔嘴邊，甚至舔到小小鼻頭。302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkhIrxnQLgn
302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1a4XrPdEaQ
我笑，笑牠傻氣可愛。302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIj3Ok4FXYV
302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcI6NHEaWdn
又吸一口虛假短暫的舒爽。又呼一口難以言喻的鬱悶。302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjxvNka2Ou7
302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡt0k7YhIKF0
鬱悶何來？302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNOQEaqmxMN
302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ09SKtJe50j
學業壓力？愛情煩惱？家庭不和？302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYImpkvyhQ5
302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHzfYe6P0OP
也許統統都是，也許統統不是。302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwpJH5BvWLP
302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmX1gaVejAE
多件零星不順心瑣碎事湊在一起成為一股無法消弭的鬱悶。302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPMsYIeWHAi
302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ38vJ1oo1XM
有如一根經過繁複工序生產的香菸。302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqJJM0q5z2k
302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqeNXtSNOzU
有如一塊由豬肉、糖、鹽、增味劑、醬油、香辛料、護色劑、色素組成的肉乾。302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjVKpRs3Noi
302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWAh08w4ZUH
「好吃吧。」我又拆開一包肉乾。趁小狗專心咬嚼，我彈走菸屁股，將牠從懷裡抽出，來個深深擁抱。302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWe3LiwrQd9
302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNtUTmMrjoD
然後呢？根本沒有然後。302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡs0G3QlT5h9
302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuH7V4lQz6X
我輕輕放下小狗，動身邁步離開。302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEXROHlOTld
302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKSDQoFVkwg
正如牠知道我身上沒有更多肉乾，自然而然不會跟上來。302Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡR8LyQcKHfN
註：此篇另收錄於短篇小說集《雜念集》
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