每次想及那傢伙，他心裡難免生恨。可是恨不了多久，恨意自然而然會被無奈與無力取代，彷彿不曾生起。353Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡna96GquaZD
輕嘆一聲。353Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9SghT2mNqM
353Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBqsTjhCjJe
媽媽的身影忽地浮現腦海。353Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3QyeHzG89B
353Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡU6hBJqCq4N
她是個不起眼的女人，普通得他早已忘記那張臉。只記得她怕熱，喜在夏日穿寬鬆短褲散熱，露出一雙細長白腿。他常趁著媽媽在露台忙於晾衫時，從後環抱她的大腿，把滾燙前額緊貼被清風吹得微微發涼的幼滑皮膚上。嘻，消暑妙法。353Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡF8iTVQsKME
353Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEoPLtO3hrb
以為這做法可以持續至小學畢業，或是直到他世故成熟得無法繼續假裝天真。誰料媽媽突然拋下一句「感情變淡」，離家出走。353Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzRTWD9e2pO
353Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBUya1jYb5t
他反覆思考何謂「感情變淡」。353Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3oLf92DXDG
353Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxMyCxWTSF4
茫無頭緒，直至那傢伙有意無意向他指出重點：變。「感情」，對媽媽毫不重要，否則她不會狠心如此；「淡」是相對而非絕對，若無經歷過對立的「濃」，「淡」其實不是問題；由濃轉淡的過程稱為「變」，也就是問題癥結所在。353Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiNKL02Ar2Q
353Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3oDMhIoiZ0
為何會變？如何變？可否不變？353Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWN9jparH2w
353Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpxJGagT27b
他百思不得其解。353Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrz2ssA5uNm
再聲輕嘆。353Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsZnuzl7Tde
353Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡalBcV3xZ0o
阿杰的身影忽地浮現腦海。353Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrLzreMsRYf
353Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT2OvTtBDTq
舊同學聚會裡，他和阿杰並肩而坐。昔日無所不談的摯友相顧假笑，努力尋找共同話題。阿杰唇邊盡是紅酒遊艇名錶，他只記顧商場即將在週末舉行的購物優惠日——妻子叮囑他務必買下保濕精華和優惠裝尿片。353Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvB88vY9d0g
353Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhJRfnZ2ZzC
真懷念往時。他與阿杰一起為那些不值一哂的天大課題感到煩惱：學業、夢想、籃球、愛情、人生規劃……後來那傢伙教曉他——一切變幻莫測，根本不由自主。無力與無奈令他深深體會自身的無能。他妒忌，妒忌阿杰仍在那個未醒的夢裡。阿杰察覺到他的妒意，露出一個輕蔑笑容。353Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxm8h7tS0zS
353Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMt7sDvBP3v
昔日無所不談的摯友相顧假笑，不再努力尋找共同話題。353Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCYar62TAHL
353Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnscu3123nI
緣起緣滅，不由自主。353Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzagZboRFsD
353Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYZU3cRZgWk
既要緣滅，何必緣起？353Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxy92dPriuS
353Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQIVzLeHc8C
他百思不得其解。353Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLCKr4kHNeM
輕嘆有三。353Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOx5BoMkV0f
353Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoUpnkvtZEa
自己的身影忽地浮現腦海。353Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyDpEU2Fcqo
353Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIIy4JSiPDq
身影有前無後。難怪，少有留意自己的背。妻子笑說他背部有七痣，像北斗，可導航。他苦笑，笑自己人生無方向。因為自己看不見北斗？只好抬頭望天。天無星，難打卦。無卦，有掛，掛心的掛。掛甚麼？不知道，總覺得人生缺失了甚麼。甚麼甚麼？不知道，難以言明。353Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1OyV5TcptM
353Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyB2RjUnPV7
鬱悶。353Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoWnA8v7XGF
353Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVaEYSJg8Dz
懷念媽媽的腿，想要抱抱。懷念阿杰手中的籃球，想要奪走。353Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqVY4Dl1Ifw
353Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsHIQ0qZoSb
去抱！去奪！353Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUIBYHtsfvT
353Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRnZwSUiefK
抱甚麼？腿已不在。353Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfLUfETTqWS
353Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSAJf8hMAXT
奪甚麼？球已不在。353Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtfoLXoZ9NX
353Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq2tBIKixLt
為何不在？為何統統不在？353Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtQljX5d9Xd
353Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUhue70LPAq
那傢伙沒有回答，繼續前行。353Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4hqCj2y0YM
353Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAhKEAjYzmk
停下來！353Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhrrQP3B2vA
353Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ54CdQBEO6p
那傢伙沒有回答，繼續前行。353Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnESKKces40
353Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTbzfbEFv1D
慢下來！353Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8nrEriXL9G
353Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4bkLmJvtjY
那傢伙沒有回答，繼續前行。353Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5pIO960kU0
353Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwz4KzPJztP
他只得拼命追趕。走馬看不見花，花開花落馬不知。馬累馬停，他累他停。回頭一望，是天不是地。何時開始背朝天？不肯定，許是拼命追趕期間、忘記自身當刻。竭力抬頭，盡力挺身。不果，只得餘生躬背望地，無法望背望星。353Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCM8wfHN9OV
353Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUrsMtfbaWc
孫兒笑問他為何腰背變躬，他答背上擔子過重。孫兒受驚拒絕背負擔子，他說無法選擇，人人不由自主。孫兒再問何解不由自主，他道是變幻莫測之故。孫兒三問為何會變、如何變、可否不變？他答不出話來，淚目凝視孫兒。353Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2zUxjVeGUd
353Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXxNrC5Ymse
昔日的他，今日的孫。353Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzdhkwEwBZ5
353Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwUVmAL6Pds
永劫，輪迴。353Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVfvVyQiC2D
353Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9RfMGYCfjT
不敢思，不求解。353Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhzB5uPNEn7
353Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡt7lBG3pBB5
嘆，嘆，嘆。353Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSRd2sNHhdP
353Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0qY2BEgV26
孫兒問他是否有煩惱，願為他出謀解決。353Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTvFGVRoI7Q
353Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRjw0OBqlEQ
他搖頭。353Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsYRXUqgCZs
353Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtB2FEJKvHX
深知世人永遠無法解決那傢伙。
註：此篇會收錄於短篇小說合集《雜念集》第八十一章353Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmjeVvgXyta
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