「世界要毀滅了，可是我喜歡你。」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsSCZTuEp1z
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ18VIecGI1t
再次用那過於老舊但還堪用的懷表確認時間後，我說。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXap0OKbtC7
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhYinKOVMEo
這樣的話語，想必不襯這春光明媚、風和日麗的下午茶宴吧。無論是傳達噩耗，更別說緊接著在那之後的表白心意，都該選擇更有那樣情調的場合才對。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQUbODxnZVA
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwpGMqJazVR
像是無雲滿月的夜空下，由傾倒的大樓所構成的廢墟中，沾染塵埃，顫抖著相擁的男女主角帶著哭腔確認彼此的心意，最終步向結局——336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVjSbdBb30f
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm0ryDlBUGv
這樣的安排做為災難片的結尾應該再恰當不過。但，假如考慮到女主角的話，那果然像現在散發著愜意氛圍的午後才更合適。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡU8hEiPrwl9
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrVMr9ETpEj
坐在對座的，是位長相清秀的少女。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7P9i0zSYjQ
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzi8TfPUxjF
端著純白色茶杯啜著紅茶的她，形狀姣好的嘴角無時無刻都帶著完美的微笑，像是和煦陽光下吹拂而過的微風，輕柔而舒暢。而這副樣貌就如同理所當然的適合她。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡL5dtIwhpMW
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5wnaf8WM7o
當然，以個人而言，還是希望她至少在我表白後，能稍稍在那抹微笑中，混入那怕些許紅霞。儘管那不可能。
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5ZrFj5eHfp
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQvTXBR8F6G
就在昨天，世界被宣布將要毀滅。原因是什麼，我也不太清楚。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaOj1n4GDbP
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFN1q6bqybK
總之人類再也無法在地球上活下去，無論原因是隕石墜落、行星爆炸，或者外星人入侵都一樣。我沒想在世界毀滅前，還多費時間去理解就算理解也無能為力的事實。只不過在新聞報導中講解的博士，聲音既無力又悵然，大概是在困惑自己為何還得在世界末日的前一天接受採訪。僅是那副樣貌莫名讓我理解到，「啊，一切都結束了」。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfqTD7Bpg88
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIgXtnr2Nsn
外面亂成了一團。前一天還平凡安穩的城市，此刻卻充塞著怒吼與哭號，槍響及鬥毆聲。不過，說實話我並不意外，或許是因為過去也曾數次接觸過這城市被掩蓋的陰暗面的緣故。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGtoKyegjRa
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡofZfq7gJ8D
我想到自己的工作，然後再想到那些身為上流社會的雇主。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmL54YQegiK
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjjlywUZhHo
就算世界毀滅，總還是有人能找到方法活下來。以現今人類的科技，應該能對這樣殘酷的現實作出某種程度的反抗。但那與什麼都不是的自己無關，我將與地球上其餘同樣無能為力的幾十億人一同滅亡。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1qjnBTJSOw
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWXfcv03ROv
想通後的第一個反應是想哭，可真窩囊。儘管用槍用刀了結了那麼多性命都毫無感觸，但面臨不可理喻的狀況淚腺就會變得脆弱，那是我直到最後也改不過來的壞毛病。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7BQ8txTEfA
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbiWWItnwh5
雖然事到如今也無所謂了，不過在哭之前，我想起了一件非做不可的事。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0bbdlVKCQW
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtQpSxC0eOz
我拿起電話，撥了她的號碼。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOfWimFq789
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp28K6TebBA
撥號聲響了一秒，兩秒——當確切意識到壽命的界線時，就連僅僅剎那的等待都嫌浪費。等到心中默數超過十秒後，對方才終於慢悠悠地接起。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡte2Qig3SRy
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjrpbVSyqvQ
「喂？」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSSPcgXNzE4
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgM0PbSqmzl
通過聽筒響起的，是從數位轉成類比訊號，略帶點雜訊的她的聲音。就算在這超現實的時候，只有她的聲音一如往常的沉穩，一如往常的悅耳。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBjobgq0TzX
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK3ErQqGgL6
「我有話要對妳說。」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFcE0ViAgK1
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe3vgW3lKpE
相較之下，我的聲音快哭出來似的又破又啞。不過，在她面前自卑也不是一天兩天的事。再說，外頭被觸動防盜警鈴的汽車響個不停，或許她也沒怎麼聽清楚。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfyTXdJVehv
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡium3mTjFcC
「那就說吧。」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡI0BJFRN8NA
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa4Jg8QgtFJ
她的話語太過愜意，對於還陷在混亂中的我而言，那樣的聲音彷彿使我離現實又遠了一點。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpSR5HRhKA2
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡboOOugsjY1
「是非得和妳見一面才能說的，很重要的事。」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKvbDiF4MCv
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhBmcFCIaij
「我還以為你是那種效率至上，更理性點的人。怎麼了，最近看了什麼羅曼史小說嗎？」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKWMur0giwG
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhkUiyuCA5h
啊，果然那種無時無刻維持從容的態度令人煩躁。在別人扯著嗓子哭喊怨嘆也不奇怪的狀況下，她還能雲淡風輕的笑著，只是自顧自地活著。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE5XZQhYjTj
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWpCrNVj5iF
那只能說不可思議了吧，而從前就喜歡上這樣的她的我也同樣如此。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7kPMO6urJ1
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNIyi0Tk1yl
我壓低聲音，或許其中還不由自主地摻進了沉痛。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYHQPL6qNJ3
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrgJA0nfnmN
「……世界應該要毀滅了。」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyUCIb5Rjpp
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP1sWf61KEq
「哎呀，真的？」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHBy6BJBC0y
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtgKJf6LGmr
「多半是，真的。」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ30B4aQ8MlQ
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡogafQky1Q3
一般在這時間，她總捧著書瞧，所以這消息她大概真是首次耳聞吧。但就算如此，她的聲音也依舊像是迎接早晨陽光那般輕鬆。同時，她也明白我並不是會為了開這樣無趣玩笑就特地打擾她的人——通常這是屬於她的專利。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMRC2OKndWR
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDFiVk8kfzb
「這樣啊……」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzc8OcZOnhr
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuAkhsZSVdg
話筒的另一端，聲音停了下來，而我也沉默。對話出現了空白，而這想必不是由於錯愕或震驚。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIfru0dbSVJ
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqbpy0X8vGz
按我對她的理解——336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZz19Jg0CoP
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡraIxnPPPdP
「那麼，久違的開個兩人的茶會吧。」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKoBNRdLnlH
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbFXVrKIp6W
她說。而她那漾起微笑的面容浮現腦海，宛如近在眼前般栩栩如生。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLrNzICp4IR
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK6xKRBC10d
——那恐怕只是啜飲紅茶時，理所當然產生的間隙。
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzrY1IWcFjy
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcXnvFNaKF5
恰如三月般的柔和陽光在平等的時間內撒在每一處，而連最後的土地享受完那來自一億五千萬公里外的恩澤後，世界將會毀滅。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSYAL4nudQ6
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeQsxX186WN
體認到這事實的我與她，正在她宅邸內的花園裡舉辦僅有兩人的下午茶會。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIBtLuSH0q1
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4xLf3Fm0vF
花園裡種著萬紫千紅，顏色艷麗的花朵。百合、杜鵑、玫瑰、海棠、紫陽花……總之無論數量或種類，都多得嚇人。儘管經過細心的呵護及嚴格修剪，再加上獨樹一幟的規劃設計，使其華麗不失格調，可她對前一代所留下的這些不太感冒，而唯獨鍾愛一株葉片混雜著紅與黑，宛如染著乾涸的血斑似的彩葉草——至於那個它，現在就在設計古雅的法式餐桌上，點心架的一旁，宛如另一位沉默的與會者那般待著。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9PIO0Ssd9L
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJcuKlQDYC8
希望她別以為我是向那株彩葉草告白就好。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGsD5mjrrax
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9BMlbmFdHv
腦袋中浮出連自己都覺得可笑的擔憂。然而我還是想找藉口：對她而言，那畢竟是做為餞別禮，意義相對特別的盆栽。雖然由送禮者的我這樣說會顯得有些自吹自擂，但她在這時還把它放在身邊，也相當程度說明了她對它的重視吧。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoev7tRBvnq
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSHO0jbFU25
腦中不由得浮現出往事。我與她的相遇，大概只能說是奇蹟。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrelZ42BO9c
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjxPB3AjUfN
當然若是鉅細靡遺的解釋，可能直到世界末日都講不完。但若把一切必然連鎖而導致的偶然撇除，單就論契機的話倒挺容易。被拋棄的垂死男孩，因為某貴族千金的心血來潮而得救——336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡupNdlsxE9K
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpdbEnXGEwL
簡單來說，就是這樣有點老套的故事。同時，也不是個在和故事女主角告白後適合訴說的故事。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr1VsHMvm96
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCn15Cwlc2n
她終於把茶杯放下。「喀拉」一聲，瓷器碰撞發出清脆悅耳的聲響，而她抿了抿唇，有如盛夏通透藍天的眼眸望向我。其中並沒有喜悅或不滿，更準確地說，我完全無法從那無暇的雙眼中讀出任何一點情緒。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIhguyoqyLs
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4sgxoDh9bY
「我曾認為——當然就連現在也一樣，我認為我是個消極的人。」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQmMMa2fbOs
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmlapiuiKZ6
她的嘴角揚起溫和的笑，接著說。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlUFQ7v72Ri
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlipCr62xL9
「雖然不想把原因全然歸咎於他人，但果然有很大部分是因為家庭因素吧。出生在名門，有著能讓我予取予求的財富，可無論什麼需求都能被滿足，那自然而然就會缺乏慾望。舉例來說就像惰性氣體，一旦滿足了就不會想再進行反應。可人還是複雜得多，只要少了，自然而然就會渴求，那是求生本能。」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSzz0gskqnr
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP50vYwyAJj
從以前開始，她總是這樣。什麼也不講明，說話彎彎繞繞，可又偏偏有著穩定而自信的嗓音，令人不由得沉浸其中，就這樣忍不住聽到最後，於是才理解她所表達的意思。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvKCFQR2OOt
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYoZmUtRROl
「或許我挺中意這樣的狀況。」她說，「再過不了多久，世界就會毀滅，一切將歸於終焉。對我，對我們而言，過去活過的時間，留下的那些證明不復存在，就連這僅剩有限的時間也變得毫無意義，因為人類剩下的未來實在太短，就算完成了什麼，那也會在頃刻之間瓦解消散。」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcnA8HRcLtz
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBFZO844tzg
說完，她的表情中沒有悵然，沒有失意，倒看起來有些像在緬懷過去。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ669LQ9Ywmr
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8UMHmYAHcn
事實上，過去類似的對話不勝枚舉，而我總是站在她的對立面，反駁她的說詞——但那畢竟只屬於個人的想法，所以最終也不曾得出過彼此都認同的結果。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYGaLjNEYik
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTbHpnGzHge
她也不是事到如今還想對此多說什麼吧，所以我只是靜待她說出話語的下半部分。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpdDJbwemmM
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9ohduSKnLH
「不過，如果要說我對現在感到最滿意的理由，那肯定只有一個。」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqYPslN3y3K
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJDUhvRqhjF
那雙澄清的藍眼毫無保留地注視著我，而從其中映出的我，表情想必既陰沉又僵硬。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMUrvMrxzy6
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDyApdleDm6
「——因為只有在這未來與過去都不再重要的現在，你才會容許自己，像這樣出現在我面前。」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsFDUuiCmXR
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeH8SWz7Baf
從以前開始，你總是那麼頑固。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe6JoBswtuF
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMmbpvXB5NA
少女有如自言自語般悠悠低吟。對此，我完全無法否認。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjLXt0ziEfU
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkXsLuCcxPq
「親口對我說吧：包含五年前的那起事件，和在那之後的你，以及事到如今才出現在我面前，對我表白的原因。」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOPCGXDrA2Z
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8jgT6aHinU
——五年前，我離開她，獨自一人逃往遠方。說離開或許不夠精確，對她而言，那是難以諒解的背叛吧。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4svKvbXdRB
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLk756PUDpH
「我還以為妳早就知道一切了。」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVNR3FCAh7C
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ6F9NRhslU
「有些東西是非得由當事人講述才能明白的呀。將回憶化作言語，在那過程中產生的，舉例來說：情緒，也就是呈現出個人主觀意識的那些。我很期待你會說出怎樣的故事。」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡn7F12XUZdk
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEYK6J60RII
「那恐怕要讓妳失望了，畢竟不是多有趣的話題……而且還得花上好一段時間。」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP0eUuuOGXX
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7CE11Q2ZSN
「我不介意，就讓我們奢侈的敘舊吧。對我而言，不存在比和你一同相處更具價值的時間。」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoJEnnAfgZL
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTNUMCRnaWk
她的笑容中彎起一絲的甜美，而由那空靈嗓音低吟而出的話語更甚。至此我也無法再婉拒，或者是只要是出自她口中的要求，我多半都無法拒絕。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEd2sVjESHV
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPT98lGVwbC
真傷腦筋。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNtoThTCz0x
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkaBzw8bIco
那，從哪開始說才好？336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ32xojVM6Tp
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQKgf7lHy4s
我在腦中構築語序，很輕易就得出了答案。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmqOvs0cV2j
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZdbh4aIQHe
果然，得從一切的源頭開始解釋吧。
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvyMLCsinAR
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg4xDKrudEp
我的雙親，是當之無愧的人渣，大概在根本上就出了點甚麼問題，可以說是瘋了吧。對外還能勉強維持正常的表象，實際上裏頭早已腐爛。所以「天下無不是的父母」這句話對我而言只是笑話，非常難笑的那種。應該沒有人會在整條腿的皮膚都被剝下來後還笑得出來才對。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeHKceVujVp
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkoCJKgLEDh
貧窮的家裡無法提供——或者說就算有錢，它們也不願給我些正常的食物，最多就是一時興起，丟隻被活活燙死的老鼠死屍讓我吃下肚——那或許是當時從它們那得來最能被稱作食物的東西。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡC19Ss9HBM1
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlEqe5SSHlB
直到現在，混著碎骨與毛皮的肉的腥臭氣味，偶爾還會在腦海中一閃而過。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4TU5dkoXzl
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtk4Sr9DvoV
對於童年，實在有太多太多不願回想的難堪回憶，煩不勝數。我不想再花時間敘述，就講結果吧。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB12ohubBck
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrWCNd6qLOh
在某天可能是終於玩膩，或者是其他理由，總之，它們盡興的對我施暴後，用個袋子把奄奄一息的我裝起來，隨便找個地方把我給扔了——畢竟在那裏，路邊的屍體並不是那麼少見的存在。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYxoNH4eH3H
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5BTlObumEE
神智不清的我倒在小巷，一旁街道上的喧囂含糊地和自己越發薄弱的呼吸聲混在一起，大腦似乎再也懶得去理會理所當然的疼痛，身體只能感到無比的沉重。死神或許正站在一旁了吧，但不巧那時的我，連睜眼的能力都沒有，所以無緣見他一面。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3Qo5RCPwY2
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeTDrzn8Sx7
對於死亡，那時的我就見得不少。被孩童玩弄至死的雛鳥，被車撞死的狗，街弄裡長滿蛆蟲的棄屍——見到的人們厭惡，撇開視線，並露出看見穢物般的表情，抱怨那狗娘養的鬼東西觸了霉頭。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEi6kyhujZ6
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq7f6Y1DlyH
過去我也是如此。但當自己真的觸及死亡時，感覺就不同了。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ41IM4nPP6E
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡynrb5zW1qp
四肢發麻，很冷，但身體卻無力顫抖。嘴裡發酸，五感像是融化那樣，唯一能明白的只有心臟的跳動越來越吃力。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjqr3EanvMP
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWm79BSK6Hl
我感受不到淚水，但那時的我想必淚流滿面，因為這才確切明白，絕沒有比死更不可理喻的事物存在——但為什麼我得受這些苦？我還想活下去。就算還得繼續受凌虐，就算死可能更輕鬆，但唯獨我還不想從這世界上消逝，我不想變得跟過去自己見到的那些一樣，所以我懷抱恐懼和絕望活到了現在。為何就連這點卑微的要求都變成是奢望？我不想死，真的。我不想死。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡavy3WGCkXd
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3DExVO0sSy
——況且，那兩個人還能活著。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLYzz6gFYmj
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtX9VjIUxIq
憑甚麼。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmBNvwDzcM5
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEsP70NDCMD
憑甚麼？336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnAGWfb3z7S
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6riOrFaipV
那強迫我降臨在這悲慘世界的存在、奪去我性命的兇手，卻還能享受自己的快樂活著。只有這點我無法忍受。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNtflpuq0wA
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAErzeCJT1i
對它們我只有滿腹的恨意，我恨它們的笑，我恨它們的飽足，我恨它們還能自在的呼吸。只有它們的絕望才能撫慰我。只有見到它們毀滅後，我才能安息。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXrd9CoLNLN
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuX5H3FXrLs
所以我不願死在這。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKaM3UO9IJy
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡO1z65r54J4
我想活下去。我想報仇，我想折磨它們，我想賜給它們痛苦，我想為那兩個喪心病狂的瘋子送上相襯的末路，我想讓它們嘗到我所經歷過百倍以上的苦難，我想要它們和現在的我一樣沉溺在對死亡的恐懼中化作無意義的肉塊——336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJAdyOLnuEp
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9ZI3AU2yp0
——就是這樣的眼神啊。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlO2WHw9xth
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡS7QsJe6BpL
少女緬懷般的聲音響起。我不由得愣住，而她坦率地直視我的眼。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYE2blEqkG9
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSEJLoZJC5P
陽光再次閃耀。遠處的花香，枝頭上的鳥鳴，以及她那輕輕摩娑我臉龐，光滑而略顯冰涼的手。這一切都讓內心陰暗骯髒的情緒漸漸消散。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEka7PccHJ2
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi4L90KqxCL
「那時我從你眼中見到，內心悸動不已的，就是你現在露出的眼神。」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSyRWcwhR0t
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFG6hwaUEKv
「……妳這怪僻真該改改。」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2LynRjXCwd
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgRfv5JYZ27
我猶豫了一下，垂下了視線，移開了她的手。那不屬於自身的溫度消失，不得不說有點失落，但這才有辦法正常進行對話。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ42Hbj1GHEG
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWMwnyrrnGT
「我喜歡光彩奪目的東西。就像在夏日沙灘上熠熠生輝的玻璃珠，或是在靜謐月光下散發皎潔螢光的水晶——抽象的說，人們為了目標或理想努力，或者是對生的渴望，對我而言，那美的幾乎讓人窒息。」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjLdSmRbSQ2
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8V8NgZs5VA
「怪人。」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcc76yPu7iE
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2BqilJxXbF
「別那樣說自己心儀的對象嘛。而且也得慶幸那時你碰上的是我這樣的怪人，你才有辦法活下來不是嗎？」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPGtiLsaDWC
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4tr886UBOi
我啞口無言，畢竟那是無可否認的事實。她遇上了我，並施以援手，最後甚至還得以存活。再說一次，這果然只能用奇蹟來形容吧。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYAIb4vvCYw
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7I0oUkRExT
「不過，這下就搞懂你為甚麼會做出那樣驚人的事情了呢。當初搜查事件的警官，可都被規定得自備嘔吐袋才可以進入現場。」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNXRz21xP2F
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzBPBG341QS
「……是嗎？」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCWw7QY9sLp
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ99ddgxZYlF
她聳聳肩。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡV4WkBJDlYn
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3t9UvHRqgk
「玩笑而已啦。當時我還沉浸在某人不告而別的悲傷中，壓根沒想過那起事件與你有關哪。」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNjhqw9tE9A
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKncCtTaE6M
她笑著，但其中卻能看出顯而易見的不悅。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0egPUoeqrI
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtCVkY0Wm19
「抱歉。」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOcrAYYADyt
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBuqtfD4xde
「嗯？你是為了什麼道歉？」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhyzfsJRK25
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSJXZwvjdKG
「大概，全部。」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPYzSHmGVU8
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjEQmH5nSJX
「這樣也太狡猾了，以前你偷吃我的點心還裝作沒事的事情我還沒找你算帳耶！」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhczThTxdry
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcTmitd7A2C
「……還要再加上我完全忘記有這回事，抱歉。」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjzmWmUdQ7s
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKm1Ocbg5nb
「……原諒你。畢竟那只是我胡謅的。不如說偷吃點心的是我才對。但那不是重點，不許岔開話題。」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5sVisD41GM
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0sEXx5ZhrG
「……抱歉。」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbTmdWOsq7K
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKwP5H8EQTU
「告訴我，為甚麼離開了？你應該明白，以我的身分，替你處理掉可能有的麻煩，並不是件難事吧？」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkiF004Esav
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrp8MhTEOT7
「當然，我明白。」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡR1y4ldrOKD
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfeJIzyGYn1
這裡的法律對於權貴相當「通情達理」。加上事件出在貧民窟，要不是屍體的狀況太過慘烈，甚至都不會被當成案件處理吧。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡah1dyRhG8V
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXGoyCv8oa4
所以，我想逃離的並不是刑罰，而是自己。
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbLTZK0Ck7B
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjDuVdbdEPK
那天夜晚，我潛入它們的住所，制伏後打暈。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsRFPcz5USv
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMSKvvI8HZ5
塞住嘴，綁在椅子上，接著用針撬開它們的指甲。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6PNj2TV1lz
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ967tHnSdbY
它們一下子就痛醒了過來，但嘴被堵住，只能嗚嗚的叫著，我沒理會，只是依序，左手，右手，左腳，右腳，把一片片那塞滿污垢的指甲剝下來。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQNVoOauaYv
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡanlPGMz8QM
再來是頭髮。用的是沸水。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLokKY13Wcn
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf4UDJs6Auk
再來是牙。用的是鉗子。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAlt4gSugsS
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVAI2w3aI2q
再來……336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi5KWrNUAb0
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ04RwTMwy5I
對它們的凌遲持續到日出。女人在兩個小時前就被男人殺死了，而男人活著，但也僅是還沒嚥下最後一口氣而已。腐朽的木製地板，斑駁的牆，早已涼掉寒酸的湯，這個室內所見一切，幾乎都被血與肉末塗上鮮紅的漆。我也不例外吧。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKzMbouM2C6
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRPDwQlLnar
靜靜的我望著倒臥在地的屍首。男人連著眼皮的眼珠落在地上沾染灰塵，被刨去血肉的半張臉，被火灼燒而焦黑的手，碎裂腿骨裸露出的粉色骨髓——終於，我忍不住反胃，吐了出來。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0obCH2X4eQ
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIlQyIAvCiU
「確實，我恨它們，更恨不得它們死。從我活下來的那天起，復仇就成為我繼續活著的唯一目的。而我也有覺悟，要親手將那兩人推入絕望的深淵。」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvWVJSxslLc
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEyxMH3RQTT
「可實際下手後，它們的痛苦卻不如想像中的甘美，他們的哭喊聽了也只想把耳朵緊緊摀起——但就算察覺了，理性卻無法順利地讓身體停下。它反倒像樂在其中似的，用盡一切方法去折磨無力反抗的那兩人。」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIavw8fzAdY
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfqfQlHPMwl
最終，復仇帶來的只有空虛與罪孽。而犯下這番暴行的我，又與它們有何不同？336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvC3Nowuuc8
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOoKgNoKXNj
「所以我逃跑了。已經無異於禽獸的我，怎麼有資格待在妳身邊，又怎麼有資格像甚麼也沒發生過那般享受幸福？」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpld5Hm4r0z
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFnU0Wd8EZF
或許當時我該讓法律制裁更好。但若是如此，我十之八九會被貴族出身，不願浪費寶貴時間在貧民窟案件的法官大人，草率的宣判死刑吧。這麼說，我的離開在某種程度上確實是因為刑罰沒錯。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKTye4tqsgZ
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTPWlZrzsin
我希望受到公正的處罰，但這國家的法律無法做到這點。我想贖罪，但卻毫無頭緒。不知如何是好的我，最終懦弱的拋下少女獨自一人，孤身逃向遠方的城市，並在陰影中躲藏著生存。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7lGz9m3NQU
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7q5QP9aPHF
這想必無法稱作懲罰，可那時我只覺得無路可走，只好選擇了這樣宛如自我滿足般的做法。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡz0D1XkRdLC
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeKXZnKH1JU
「總之，這就是全部了。無趣而令人生厭吧。」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlDVY2rbY6d
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡc9hbz5rAk3
我往後靠向椅背，長長地嘆出一口氣。而少女依舊是不知在想些甚麼的表情看著我，開口。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8vz8rsTtFJ
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8H0neTVSsi
「……我居然是因為這樣的理由才被甩了呀。」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqzochqCBrX
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJqMerSsqZ0
「……抱歉。」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcgYqOjtYlR
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZCntaTUXHU
也是，肯定難以接受吧。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMeRGaTpsf8
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTyeZqToMxC
若是這份情感在五年前向她傳達，那一切，包含至今為止的人生，肯定會大大的不同。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCd6zXpGbBT
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLaCDZ7LaCn
假如重來，五年前的自己，是否會放下仇恨，而選擇追求眼前的幸福？336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpa1AZm8RSh
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2RzUbilmJQ
說實話，我不確定。畢竟復仇絕非光鮮亮麗的夢想或目標，在那前方有的只是地獄。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAJZthkZWii
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcmrl1FfzzV
但若說放棄，那滿腔的恨意又該何去何從？原諒它們？靜待時間消化？不，絕無可能。果然最後我也只能吐出這樣表面的道歉。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTLHc3IzMBL
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡddDyliVzD2
而她搖頭，笑容少見的有些苦澀。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnOzHCHLY1D
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcIJ3p7Bda9
「我明白的。本來我的期待，在收到這株彩葉草時就該破滅了。那再明顯不過的意涵，怎麼可能沒有察覺？可奇怪的是，我卻遲遲無法死心，明明就只是那樣消極的人呀。」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa6T3N9ixBN
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡepmyxQY01e
她拿起茶杯，沒有啜飲，而是望著杯底殘留，早涼了的紅茶。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5ZiV3X8jqi
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWhYVJkI9d8
「那是我的生日——更是我父母去世的那時候。為甚麼非得選在那時拋下我離開？該不會你出乎意料地恨我吧？」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLcG9ZDqn1b
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrqeDdqsn1O
「……沒有這回事。」不如說，截然相反。「我喜歡妳，和妳相處的時光真的很快樂，甚至足以動搖我復仇的念頭。但正因為如此，我必須在對妳的喜歡還沒壓過仇恨的時候下手……」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr3BHdBU1Fo
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK82vCLYWoY
「我不會問，那為何還要堅持復仇。因為那沒有意義。」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡphb7VopZl5
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb4V4PpUjSC
她「碰」地放下茶杯，打斷我的解釋。深紅的液體從杯內撒出，濺在少女的衣襬上，而她的語調既快又急。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyzDQGD1zcl
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaYgZ6cj6Dc
「但既然如此，過去對這些隻字未提的你，事到如今又為何還來向我坦白？」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsaYIvKIxjO
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2rlDUegK7o
少女清澈的雙眼，此刻散發過去從未見過強烈而不容我逃避的意念。在那眼神的注視下，我差點承受不住別過眼去。但原本正午熾熱耀眼的陽光，隨時間經過一秒比一秒衰弱。已經不再有我軟弱猶豫的餘地。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmKTI86GUBC
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPLLjxnbE7c
更何況，我正是為此而來。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyi58Usqv0L
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3zgRdAvGZh
對象就在面前，覺悟也已足夠，也沒有臨陣脫逃的藉口。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsJWSCKOiY4
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN586oapskA
我深吸一口氣，終於下定決心開口。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIuwfc8IqBL
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡznDrXVXNrb
「我一直都在思考。就連和妳通完電話前往這裡的路上，和妳見面的前一刻，我都在想，是否該打消向妳告白的念頭。」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAmm2AFZKjP
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ8uMrtNmWh
「是啊，畢竟在世界毀滅的前一天才表白心意，無論被接受還是拒絕，又能改變什麼呢。」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGpig4sNEzI
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1hGLuSxz1q
「或許妳說得沒錯。但我是個卑鄙自私的人啊，想法既頑固又利己，甚至為了可笑的自我滿足，連喜歡的女孩子都傷害了，老實說就是個十足的人渣。但就算是我這樣的討厭鬼，果然在世界末日之前，還是會想做點甚麼，讓自己沒那麼混帳啊。」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyZvTha66SX
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZFslaT4XrA
這是我發自內心的實話，但少女聽著微微皺起了眉頭，表情是顯而易見的不滿意。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuiP05hi7Dk
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡL3xf3vYZpY
「……別開玩笑了。你至今為止堅持的，只是那麼不堪一擊的事物嗎？」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNBZkh46oOw
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡburjiwgqKV
「不是。但在死亡面前，我終於認清，對我而言還有遠比那要更重要的事物。」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDzMWTApHp7
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7flQE3ol8m
「我不明白你的意思。」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwJH8JcMcNZ
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKsRMQXQ5M1
她直直地盯著我，我張嘴，而本該出口的話語卻不由自主地停下。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWHE7bx0aTW
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcqJJCVNj2A
要解釋的話，可得把自己那些幼稚的想法全攤在她面前。說實話，只有難以啟齒能形容。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDh8uriUKVP
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡveplCwJCQ6
她會看不起我吧，唾棄那些任意妄為的念頭，甚至對我失望透頂也有可能。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBDJn0iOrbD
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfzqxEG0nrc
「我沒辦法放棄對妳的喜歡啊。」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOni6WCAw66
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqPmRILNQZs
不過，我還是說了。更忍不住低下頭，隱瞞羞恥而泛起的潮紅。但我沒有停下，而是一股腦地繼續傾訴言語。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZyepEJ6ucg
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIcyEcF26YE
「我喜歡妳。從過去到現在一直。我本以為會好好地把那秘密帶進墳墓，不過我似乎沒有堅強到在見到妳以後，還能忍受這份情感無人知曉，就這樣化為塵土的痛苦。」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVbqFklXxGL
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDiXZkn3jSM
「但我可不記得自己喜歡上的是這樣沒有原則的笨蛋。」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmoBhpxN0zz
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJCRSr1IFoq
雙手沾滿鮮血，斷送了無可計數的人的命及希望。這樣罪無可赦的我還妄圖追求幸福，實在是恬不知恥吧，果然自己還是十足的混帳，完全沒有反省。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqu96vjJBAU
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8G2HrRQ1Ax
「我也以為我要更死板點，看樣子自己是比想像中更不要臉。」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlgsZy4qrkO
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjSkLen8y0Q
「那麼，你的自責，你過去認為需要償還的罪呢？」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMMg5vSiF5V
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVlfsEzyh5D
「就先賒下來，等死後交給神來審判，下了地獄後再還吧。」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMGAxBdl1Kb
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqqPFtiezfL
「……你甚麼時候開始對莫名其妙的宗教感興趣了？」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoK1VqFMANe
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5PeCmxLT0u
「剛才。」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmUzLcn3MCh
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxEqksdCKLM
不過是教義亂七八糟，只為了貪圖方便而利己的信仰。這樣看來，不如稱其為褻瀆要更貼切點。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmkvJ0T7jvv
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJwSUHDQTWP
「真蠢。」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8DMlQEjk4b
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNzsM7DCx7O
「抱歉。」我深吸一口氣，「但我果然還是喜歡妳。」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPrvnk6X9Ad
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjeyPmsLkdc
腦袋雜七雜八的念頭混在一起，說出口的句子也凌亂破碎，邏輯更是破綻百出，胡言亂語也該有個限度。但她沒有恥笑，或者對我冷嘲熱諷，而依舊擺著那副毫無波動，難以理解的表情，沉默地看著我。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ171fmyMWoC
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcWYInGRiQT
就這樣對視了十來秒。她像是認輸般的撇過頭去嘆氣，就像沉思似地看向飄著雲的藍天。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ13I9OObxVh
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYpi40AA0TU
然後，她接著回答。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡO4xBfGhiMH
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcaafsGxr00
「我也是呀。」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcOxhE7oFYS
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡloi9nSET2m
就只是那短短四個字，讓我感到心臟猛烈確實的跳動。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRto1txPum3
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2XSRLxIXTS
滾燙的血液運送氧氣及幸福感，使四肢充滿活力，我費了好大的工夫才忍住歡呼的衝動——但她的反應卻與我截然相反。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1THmiXM0ZG
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtCauw0Q9DE
少女只是靠向椅背，右手托腮，冷冷地遙望天空，沒有再開口。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnft6iVb5f4
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6prErbZkVh
許久。至少對於僅存的時間而言，足夠久的時間裡，我抬起頭來，安靜望著她，而她望著天。那側臉上的表情有些虛幻。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡESEaWQ5ZWx
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ1gfSHpSBa
……那樣就好了吧。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbftUc3G0WE
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH9MRxOMKjZ
我這麼想，不再拿出懷錶。因為無論結果如何，我也已經了結了自己最後的心願——336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw6mWL1T3uz
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYiEGT25Zp9
但是——宛若低喃，輕如微風的話語從她口中訴出。但是，彷彿接續我未完成的句子。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBc6BxJWuBu
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnhfGK71PmV
我沒有漏看一絲她表情的變化。也因為如此，我目睹了那與世界末日足夠相襯的那個瞬間。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh2t9rTL8Gb
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyAjR3cGrOs
「啊啊，這果然只能帶來痛苦，不是嗎？」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2dDN5XIH19
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡquBn09dZdI
——她的聲音明顯地顫抖著。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPetPEdN6P3
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIsLOZZjC8P
彷彿真的覺得困擾般，她細長的眉皺起，緊緊抿住的嘴角不再上揚，取而代之一雙眼泛起淚光的她，轉過頭來面對我說。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWMRFjRMmlt
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIHKMwlRAMv
「為甚麼不把那感情藏到最後一刻？吶，就當作是騙我吧。說你喜歡我只是個玩笑，只是在世界完結前心血來潮的惡作劇——為甚麼要讓我朝思暮想的美夢成真？為甚麼到最後才害我喜歡上那所剩無幾的生命？」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLOL99qTeNB
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6K27BEXZEQ
她緊緊揪住胸口，我一句話也說不出來。只是想著——果然我罪該萬死。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMLunEDdV35
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6rzucIme5x
晶瑩的淚珠劃過少女白淨的臉龐，午後柔和的日光灑在她金燦的髮絲上，而同樣溼了眼眶的我的眼中映出的她，宛如散發著光輝，顯得耀眼，顯得聖潔。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6AROApgxUd
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlLVsjqLvsS
但是，這肯定不是那麼美好的東西。畢竟其中包含的是對死的恐懼、對即將逝去的生的不捨，與對剛開始就得完結的戀情的悲嘆。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4add3cRXZV
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbyUsZU0DC9
無論她表現得多麼雲淡風輕，終究還是個正值青春年華的少女。面臨突如其來的死，面臨一切瓦解殆盡的末日，怎麼可能不受影響。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyCVwuBKzCk
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJCtllS8qux
「本來還能欺騙自己的。在世界結束的前一刻還能再見到你，光是這樣就已經足夠，就能帶著真的只是那麼一點的遺憾結束。真的已經做好這樣的心理準備。但被一直喜歡著的人告白後，怎麼還可能做到！」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzJZbtgBp2d
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡS3DuUlLudM
她不停地落著淚，而過分甜美的哭腔令人動容。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQ70qVoNvIM
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdVHnLEqf3Y
方才的喜悅已不見蹤影，我看著那樣的她，心如刀割，可大腦卻只想得出廉價的安慰。光憑那些蒼白無力的話語，又怎能止住她的淚水？336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXNmmG2F5IM
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5HownBdlt1
如果可以，我多想現在將她擁入懷中，替她拭去淚水，成為她的助力。但她流淚的起因是我一廂情願的話語，若再做出那樣像是置身事外的舉動，連我自己都無法原諒。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoXo9G2IlTy
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUd27i1eefy
難道我又錯了嗎？336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMRFCII26A0
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡU4rLQU9VlT
這樣的念頭在腦中一閃而過。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTAMqnMHgZp
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8jS1JNnvWN
——當初如果放棄復仇就好了。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7lwO2DZQIq
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmj86QrrSp4
當初再更厚臉皮一點就好了。或者，自己只需要好好放下這份情感，今天別來和她見面就好了。這樣一切都不會改變。甚麼也不會產生，也就甚麼都不會消失，少女更不會在這最後一幕，流下悲傷的眼淚。一切會如日出日落那般理所當然地迎來終結——正如過去我們所預想的那樣。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeZx1gmjr3J
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ86ibPZplgA
但是。我搖搖頭，將那些毫無幫助的想法從腦中驅逐。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQSfyqRjWEZ
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡABcDaJSeEi
是啊。或許過去自己真的錯了。但追求幸福不該是錯誤。無論何時，傳達心意也並不是件會讓人痛苦的事。我是這麼認為的，而我也希望少女那麼想。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡASiRzhohYy
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1OfW2ZCpDi
所以自己果然既自我中心又卑劣。但就算這樣的我，她也對我說了喜歡，那這樣就好。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡry8LYhFPyh
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5ZA7bibOgH
接下來該做的就是拚盡一切，為了讓少女能再次展露笑顏。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA5uA3q1IGn
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbmpuld92EW
「確實啊。才剛實現的戀情瞬間就要破滅，而且還是因為世界末日這種難以接受的原因，當然很痛苦。但就算如此，我果然還是認為，能在最後向妳傳達心意，真的是太好了。」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtxhNR0i1og
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9xOJh7znab
愚鈍又無知的我，無法堆砌華麗的文藻，也講不出能打動人心的名言佳句。自己更不是正向熱血的主角，沒有必須打倒的邪惡魔王，也阻止不了即將到來的末日。我唯一能做的，只有將心中認為正確的事物，盡其所能準確地轉化為言語傳達給她。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJFAKiZEve7
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhgHuPfYYQ8
「一點都不好！能聽見你親口說喜歡我很開心，可那不夠啊。想一直和你在一起，想牽著手出門，還有更多，更多……但那些再也做不到了！既然這樣，還不如甚麼也不要開始更好不是嗎？」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx5aKNrJDEB
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ50TUWbhWCp
淚水濕濡化著淡妝的臉，而姣好的臉龐上表情扭曲。她就像淹溺於絕望中那般向我呼喊著。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtSW59fZPPa
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIBb5rN3sfo
——不是這樣的。我否認。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡn4b6bWkEqc
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5OxnKfEGYm
「比起一無所有。就算必須承擔失去的痛苦，就算只是稍縱即逝，我還是認為感受過幸福的人生更加美好——人終究是活在當下。就算餘下的未來只剩不到半天，那怕感受到的喜悅只是剎那，但在心中誕生的感觸，閃亮耀眼的某些東西，都該有所價值才對。」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8lQioBs3xX
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBbirzTmVHf
「……那只是你的想法吧。」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwRnmzNAANW
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2gQDJA9Gvl
「妳說得沒錯，那只是我的想法。價值觀並不是能強加給誰，或者由他人定奪、評判對錯的東西。就像過去我們所談論過的那樣。」我起身走到她的身旁，蹲下。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMeXYSWRpJz
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡd3o5K9mrbr
「所以我沒辦法說妳錯。但——」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBa04hb8Dsl
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYyTmNr5cgb
千萬人有千萬種幸福的定義，追求的方式也不盡相同。但畏懼失去而駐足不前，那樣並不算是幸福。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6oaLrsuh3k
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoamWHNK58t
「——比起哭泣，果然能讓人笑著的那方更棒，不是嗎？」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsodi1is1Md
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5KoEM2j4mj
我輕輕替她抹去淚水，一面扯出了不熟悉而僵硬，甚至還有點扭曲，但總之確實存在的微笑。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5vatmirDrw
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiRuWwWUIkm
儘管是像我這樣又遜又不入流的傢伙，還是希望能讓喜歡的女孩子不再流淚，並能露出幸福的笑容。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ96eTHgN3wY
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡz97NP3ysmA
「這也……太犯規了！」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRvNoFAiUt0
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw4SGpOiwxx
她淚如泉湧地喊著。並像要毆打我那般撞進我的懷中。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE7cFUSH5k7
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQtUlcFEvZr
結果而言，她沒有停下哭泣，反倒更進一步，宛如孩童似地嚎啕大哭。她泣不成聲地說著抱怨與罵人的話，對象有大半是對我，而剩下的因為聲音哽咽與嘶啞而無法辨別。我摟住她，感受懷裡的溫度，以及肩頭上落下更加炙熱的淚水，然後拍著她的背，就這樣直到夕陽沉沒，夜幕降臨。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZlN3HKssDI
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJa6tWODeEO
在那之後我們換了位子，是兩人位的長椅，我們倆並肩相依而坐。藍紫色的夜空依稀可見點點星光，而皎潔皓白的月高掛在上頭。周遭響著蟲鳴，以及青蛙清脆的歌聲，營造出鄉村似悠閒的氛圍。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0CAbUbVhQ0
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡirhM09AGyY
一旁立燈散發昏黃且溫暖的橙光，照亮這畝地。許多被吸引的小蟲正繞著那飛舞。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡohGks8uSTq
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP9s8GgcpME
印象中她對蟲沒有好感，無論色彩豔麗的蝴蝶或是蛾。不過，現在也不是在意那個的時候。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2hKJE5V7xp
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmlOyR7jE70
「好久沒那樣哭過了……大概有記憶以來這還是第一次。」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhGsqIjDd7w
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtnjCO6wMsZ
她的頭靠在我的肩膀上，聲音還有些低啞。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUNywtCSdzi
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJGnU4Xa4Sp
「大概也是最後一次了。」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUj7P41Gfqp
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwvkVAJWUTS
「住口。你是想害我繼續哭嗎？」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGZA22bcdKe
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5g1eJyXG8B
我搖搖頭。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHkPkZ2P9It
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfhXT5sA1ar
「我的意思是，從現在開始，我會盡可能地努力，為了讓妳不再哭泣。」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ93QdnnARz9
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnlDSaEVunC
「呼，哈哈。所以這些台詞都是從哪本愛情小說上看來的啊？」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡO2W4VCFzV8
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUJIQEY7BUX
她笑出聲來，伸出白皙而纖細的手指，戳了戳我的臉。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT6mtFlBlTP
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdReIAAf9E2
「少囉嗦。」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwcTgUxOGC1
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxUctjF8aLl
……果然那種裝模作樣的話不適合我啊。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUbXfQfi36r
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzgO2CeRvp4
銀鈴般的笑聲響起，和諧地融入夜色。直到總算滿足後，她稍微縮起身子，握住了我的手。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1LcAgEeKMQ
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2cjgXC3PWm
她的手細嫩又柔軟，和長滿厚繭的我的手截然相反，而我毫不在意地輕輕回握。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCJwWUeZWzl
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKB49u26XTm
「嗯，感情真是奇妙的東西。」她閉起眼，嘴角牽起一抹輕笑。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡO4AyUh9Y2P
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa0jM1900dQ
「像這樣碰觸著你就能感到幸福，但滿足的同時，內心卻又呼喊著要索求更多……」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡihKlF0vDnt
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjZYHv1n41v
她的細語宛如夢囈，身體更加靠了上來。胸膛能感受到她心臟的跳動，而鼻頭能感受到她吐息的吹拂。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNhEyntNbOb
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrUJliVMNuV
她跨坐在我身上，距離近的讓我眼中只容得下她。蔚藍的雙眼殘留哭過的痕跡，但其中卻散發耀眼的光彩；而那頭柔順的金髮在月光照拂下閃著銀色的光輝，此刻的她就宛如湖中的妖精那樣魅人。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9o1gSypXPH
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9xHIV0KBNF
「所以，更加地滿足我吧。」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpbMeQgaYIO
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHCsB065dFf
「……悉聽尊便。」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAM1BUNYrRS
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡurgXua9q0q
「然後，別再離開我。」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuUUMdfUigB
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK54OntpG8Z
「我哪裡都不會去。」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5SE5jZqes3
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuU2lM0g6p9
「謝謝。我愛你啊。」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqHkQlkFw0P
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw8z9MJE4Y9
「我也愛妳。」336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlYEkGbQhlD
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVIsNOCc16s
聽完，她笑了。希望那不是台詞太過肉麻的緣故。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9jihFWfLTk
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpWbAytq9qz
嘴失去了說話的作用，因此刻有比言語更能準確傳達心意的方法。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ1l37GrOfA
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZj4MoqH5pV
而老舊的懷表盡其所能的拖緩指針的步伐，每一度都轉得艱辛。那模樣宛如要替主人多爭取一點時間似的，充滿徒勞卻美好的意象。336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYMYthmVgz7
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCsNAzAJcT0
然後，指針重合——336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB32izebkWr
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDDUcvfpHHa
一天就這樣結束了。
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUoMp9ddHwI
（世界要毀滅了，可是我喜歡你。）
336Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx6wEBshT2v
