![](https://static.penana.com/images/chapter/1408273/Ql_.jpg)
-免責聲明:故事內容涉及以人類加入妖怪食物鏈情節,純粹以現時生物學生態類比,只屬幻想與虛構,如有雷同實屬巧合 - 32Please respect copyright.PENANAEtOvD87H4H
32Please respect copyright.PENANA6WPVj3Pe0M
「喂,華仔。」條鬼佬以鬼佬腔廣東話叫我。「今晚有無節目?無就一齊去一野咬到d女一頸血啦?」32Please respect copyright.PENANAv3qoBXfF6E
32Please respect copyright.PENANAWxaDPLtvnW
問返果時做咩咬鳩我?佢話,因為佢飲醉左酒喎。而家我焗住要同佢住。無計啦,就算嬲鳩佢咬鳩我,都要同返d生活習慣一樣既人往,做野起上黎方便d呀嘛。32Please respect copyright.PENANAUl2kkgxVcA
32Please respect copyright.PENANAuNaq0vx3kf
「戇鳩仔先會用牙隊落人條頸,噴到成身都係。」我話。32Please respect copyright.PENANA48RIEBFwQE
32Please respect copyright.PENANAriXhbzncub
「哈哈,我係戇鳩仔。咁先好玩!」鬼佬話。其實鬼佬份人都幾nice,有少少英國紳士feel。不過鬼叫佢咬鳩我咩?咬鳩我我就屌佢架啦。32Please respect copyright.PENANA89k0lyXNBG
32Please respect copyright.PENANAzK7DbynPRz
鬼佬平時真係會著到成個吸血鬼咁,典型英國風格既吸血鬼。每年Halloween佢就最出位架啦。佢對於班本土派香港殭屍就好少理,因為佢吸親既,都係鬼妹。美國妹英國妹俄妹賓妹索高維亞妹,有邊種妹佢未食過?所以呢,佢又唔會話搶哂班殭屍風頭。有時真係想學下佢咁豁達。英國佬就係咁。BTW佢話佢最憎蘇格蘭吸血鬼。32Please respect copyright.PENANAwqzYc44Ig3
32Please respect copyright.PENANAqtAsE2Hgzt
我地住埋同一個單位,位於元朗某間村屋。如果你都住附近,不防留意下果有架老爺benz,就係我地所在既位置啦。咁當然唔會話埋你知咩車款啦:o)32Please respect copyright.PENANAtQrFzgcok0
32Please respect copyright.PENANAEAoGU8GdvT
不過鬼佬佢佢從來唔會渣,因為佢會直接變蝙蝠飛去目的地,渣架車過老蘭?佢先唔會啦,過海好撚貴喎佢話。所以成日叫我郁下架車,費事電池無電,叫人黎救車又洗幾舊水。32Please respect copyright.PENANA6OEsvuRiFb
32Please respect copyright.PENANAdg9Eh8cEzs
(旁白:點解你地成日乜都話貴?)32Please respect copyright.PENANAxek1RHeYCq
32Please respect copyright.PENANAJDHSkg28CN
屌啦,吸血鬼都要洗錢架!我地要一日2餐,一個月要飲一次人血,果兩餐唔係錢呀?仲有交租呢?燈油火蠟呢?香港做咩唔洗錢架?做吸血鬼,係香港仲難生存,都唔知邊忽有血!鬼佬就話唔洗點做野,幾百年前銀行D錢,今日仲收緊息,都咪話唔和味!至於我,就係雙失吸血鬼。32Please respect copyright.PENANAPYAnbD7Iqe
失業、失戀。32Please respect copyright.PENANAFAIz4yMf8t
32Please respect copyright.PENANAPcNAmSkIzN
不過咁,呢部黑色 Benz都叫做變左我溝女既工具。32Please respect copyright.PENANAs6jtM5CKbM
32Please respect copyright.PENANAMZ6xwXjcY7
呀係,小姓劉,名叫做華仔,德華。因為我好鐘意做愛,所以d人又會叫我做愛德華,或者華仔。二十年前,1996年係24歲。今年,2016年,個樣仍然係24歲。32Please respect copyright.PENANADRupwyIBe9
32Please respect copyright.PENANAP9076ATAVN
當年未有SARS,大學生好吃香。今年,大學生做慘過擔爛泥怪。我雖然用左十年時間,讀左個degree,但都唔知做乜好。我呢D夜行生物,除左看更都唔知做咩好囉。試過係老蘭d夜店做過一排bartender既,不過環境太嘈了,吸血鬼對耳唔多頂得順。32Please respect copyright.PENANA4GL0NBDizS
32Please respect copyright.PENANAvdBtmFtoF7
但係,最近見左份新工,希望可以搵到食啦...我諗,應該都幾過癮既。32Please respect copyright.PENANA7GDwBkj5lQ
32Please respect copyright.PENANAlhyKYcAhW4
====================================================32Please respect copyright.PENANAyWSB5hRPap
32Please respect copyright.PENANADgMABXjpq6
「華仔下嘛,請坐。」一個著住西裝的女人話。32Please respect copyright.PENANArjQsKAHnZp
32Please respect copyright.PENANAlyv2jCewkq
「..唔該。」我話。「可唔可以拉左個窗簾或者..較暗少少個燈。」32Please respect copyright.PENANAS4dLK3hYAE
32Please respect copyright.PENANAyQztMIwCP8
「先生,我都想請你除左副超先,我地先至可以繼續。」個女人話。32Please respect copyright.PENANAyXl7SDq14g
32Please respect copyright.PENANAYJ9tqY6EjV
超,除咪除!吸血鬼唔鐘意見光姐,唔代表見光會死。32Please respect copyright.PENANAcgzmG7Ms6C
32Please respect copyright.PENANADutbiTAGOt
「愛德華先生,想請問下你對於你申請既職位,有幾了解?同埋有咩期望呢?」個女人問我。32Please respect copyright.PENANAXKbQh1gksj
32Please respect copyright.PENANA3YSSPgnLZs
「咩呀...殺人之嘛下嘛。」我話。32Please respect copyright.PENANAaJ9n8CGKqP
32Please respect copyright.PENANAZtuMHBtxew
「你的確講得無錯...」女人話。「不過...我地指定要殺既人物,一定要以特定方法令佢死亡,唔係只係殺。你知啦,香港地呀嘛。」32Please respect copyright.PENANAtfmR5Akyyp
32Please respect copyright.PENANAoWuKi7TeG2
無錯,我見呢份工就係全職殺手。當然唔係上jobDB就搵到啦,點都要靠D門路先至搵到。(唔好問我邊度搵)32Please respect copyright.PENANAvcYTdSkRS1
32Please respect copyright.PENANAWJJjrmTYZS
(旁白:香港有殺手架咩?)32Please respect copyright.PENANAg5kMqb3uRE
32Please respect copyright.PENANAqHH3Ohkeau
你地以為香港無殺手?哈哈,咁你地就錯了....你地自己睇下政府公佈既每年香港失蹤人口數字啦,每年穩定地有幾百人。我可以話,除左比我地呢類人外生物食左之外,都係殺手所為。32Please respect copyright.PENANA1bfrifgsNt
32Please respect copyright.PENANA8XOHPdm1tL
「明既明既...」我話。「不過可唔可以舉少少例呢?」32Please respect copyright.PENANAY7JsY2vHd1
32Please respect copyright.PENANAEk4oZwdN4d
「我地係你正式加入前,唔可以講太多。」女人話。32Please respect copyright.PENANAwYwduqHrty
32Please respect copyright.PENANApR3YCkZm4u
「咁我加入囉。」我說。32Please respect copyright.PENANAN2coygWCN4
32Please respect copyright.PENANAY6GUPqbdZj
「等等先....先生,我都未知道你適唔適合我地呢份工作。」女人企起身,指住一個紙板人。「我想請你係500米外,刺殺佢比我睇下。工具有哂係檯面,你可以用任何方法。」32Please respect copyright.PENANAXPMcTtvdWy
32Please respect copyright.PENANAFwkx5oGizV
我望住檯上面,有刀有弓箭有球棒仲有支甜筒,就係無槍。32Please respect copyright.PENANAQgFWCwlMX8
32Please respect copyright.PENANA7i7LeMhTqp
不過都好,比槍我反而唔識用。一個正常香港人有幾可掂過槍呀?32Please respect copyright.PENANAwSQBToE8tk
32Please respect copyright.PENANAwknZ5U6FVM
「開始得未呀?」我問。32Please respect copyright.PENANAUIq8AYqf1o
32Please respect copyright.PENANA6l47BTytw9
女人點頭。32Please respect copyright.PENANAFXrftkNyL0
32Please respect copyright.PENANAxSmd6M5sQF
難得有機會,我當然要玩返少少花招啦,豈有此理個女人睇少我?區區一個人類....睇少我?32Please respect copyright.PENANAzqpwmCS4Fo
32Please respect copyright.PENANA4kIZHpFzRm
「颯!」一下風聲,紙牌人既頭先經比我撕左落黎,係我手上。而我仍然企係原位。32Please respect copyright.PENANA7ulEnuAWHd
32Please respect copyright.PENANAHobKHAWtbu
「....」女人呆左。「你點做到架?」32Please respect copyright.PENANAkZXa7rcbCD
32Please respect copyright.PENANA9v1qleQPql
「秘密。」我羅住個人頭放係我塊面前面當做面具。32Please respect copyright.PENANAk4yvW0Nw1r
32Please respect copyright.PENANAjfuIuIj15Z
「....」女人開始好好奇。「起碼都話我知呢個係咩門派既武功?」32Please respect copyright.PENANAzJRjx05J89
32Please respect copyright.PENANAEyTH8iaMIJ
我轉一轉個方向再擺pose:「都係秘密。」32Please respect copyright.PENANAImJA1ENHTH
32Please respect copyright.PENANA6e9Nhc7R5p