「你唔好理我得唔得?」殷書賢無力地講道,佢嘅內心早已比迎面而嚟嘅種種壓力壓垮,「鎅刀比番我⋯」253Please respect copyright.PENANAldmByegC8v
253Please respect copyright.PENANAcVodEf9Ezd
「唔得。」邱茗然堅決地講道,佢怕殷書賢會將鎅刀搶走,所以緊緊地將鎅刀握住,「今次我唔會好似上次咁好人比番把鎅刀你。」253Please respect copyright.PENANAhi2qrkRJtB
253Please respect copyright.PENANA1dpefb1Qcf
「你當我求你啦好唔好⋯」殷書賢伸手出嚟,佢唔想硬搶,只好懇求邱茗然將鎅刀還番比佢,「我真係真係好攰呀⋯真係好辛苦⋯」253Please respect copyright.PENANAKIiFEskPvU
253Please respect copyright.PENANA1ooPu0gHip
「唔得。」邱茗然搖頭堅決拒絕253Please respect copyright.PENANAdlod3k3ZZO
253Please respect copyright.PENANAgKQ8GTUT02
「比番我!」殷書賢嘅內心有啲忍無可忍嘅感覺,崩潰嘅感覺滲到每一個角落,佢即刻伸手攞,邱茗然緊緊地握實鎅刀喺手中253Please respect copyright.PENANAkneJDSoHqS
253Please respect copyright.PENANAd18xExzB3V
「你睇下你隻手。」邱茗然將拎住鎅刀嘅手收到身後,另一隻手一下子捉起殷書賢嘅左手253Please respect copyright.PENANAg0zUYfCCs7
253Please respect copyright.PENANASw5OBEsMGB
殷書賢嘅手已經佈滿新嘅傷口,仲有啲係啱啱鎅出嚟,仲有血跡;邱茗然捉住殷書賢嘅手腕,作為朋友又好,邊個都好,佢都唔會比殷書賢繼續傷害自己253Please respect copyright.PENANAsNzFcZxFlu
253Please respect copyright.PENANA6GOZ4LxFds
「你睇下你已經傷到咩地步?」邱茗然眉頭一皺問道,「你要傷害自己到咩地步?」253Please respect copyright.PENANAdIVNPmza7C
253Please respect copyright.PENANAd3awc6mXZn
殷書賢抽手,將邱茗然嘅手甩開,佢耷低頭,雙手掩着雙眼托住額頭;邱茗然望住殷書賢手上嘅滲血嘅傷痕,佢知佢辛苦,最近殷書賢一直都講緊佢好攰好辛苦253Please respect copyright.PENANAGNY9OqGFH4
253Please respect copyright.PENANALJyF2WX3sP
「我都覺得我要死啦⋯」殷書賢嘅聲線微微顫抖,「就嚟透唔到氣⋯」253Please respect copyright.PENANAyAr49pcs8L
253Please respect copyright.PENANAwUl7OvjKum
「你咁同我講嘢令媽媽好難過,但我只係為你好」253Please respect copyright.PENANAP3bEznYweQ
253Please respect copyright.PENANATLk5S9Hv4m
「第一名對我同爸爸嚟講唔重要,只係想你考得好,DSE考得好,你將來會好行啲」253Please respect copyright.PENANAPSKAvqthrg
253Please respect copyright.PENANA2WKyJVGAVU
「唔係要逼你讀醫,只係為你嘅未來好」253Please respect copyright.PENANAa3UmUsBveA
253Please respect copyright.PENANACvBG83kWt2
「我係過來人,你係我個仔,我點會害你?」253Please respect copyright.PENANAlN8nsLa0dc
253Please respect copyright.PENANAta1R2j4cSI
對殷書賢嚟講,一句「我係過來人,點會害你」就好似感情勒索一樣,媽媽特登打電話過嚟講一大堆嘢,但原來根本只係兜一大個圈,都係逼佢行呢個「過來人」想佢行嘅路⋯253Please respect copyright.PENANAYe13BG4T0x
253Please respect copyright.PENANAvxyEB5Tvmg
「我真係唔明⋯點解嚟到呢個關頭,都可以講得咁理直氣壯話係為我好⋯」殷書賢嘅雙手掩住臉,佢好攰,又係身心俱疲嘅一日一樣,「明明只係想佢知道我有幾攰、幾努力、幾比心機⋯想佢反思一下佢到底比咗幾多壓力我,但原來⋯佢都係覺得一啲問題都冇⋯」253Please respect copyright.PENANA8qb5dzLsCc
253Please respect copyright.PENANAmv4mm5wA8k
邱茗然唔知要點樣回答,佢唔係殷書賢,佢唔可能100%了解殷書賢嘅辛苦佢嘅攰,佢可以做嘅,係安靜咁聽殷書賢訴說佢嘅難受⋯253Please respect copyright.PENANA1sherpeJ2C
253Please respect copyright.PENANAwBUNbBnBOM
「我由上到高中開始,生活就變到得番讀書;我成個聖誕假,除咗出去玩嗰一日,我每日都係溫緊書⋯」 殷書賢嘅聲線夾雜住明顯嘅難受,「唔係我想要咁樣,而係我冇得揀⋯我好驚,見到成績有少少跌咗就好驚⋯好怕最後會真係令好多個人失望⋯」253Please respect copyright.PENANAS3vc9czeED
253Please respect copyright.PENANApn8Aay42Xh
「喺學校全部都係講住成績,番到屋企梗加唔洗講,我媽又朝提到晚⋯唔係要我一定要考第一,就係一定要考醫學院,DSE嘅成績表上面要有星⋯」253Please respect copyright.PENANARDktZMg2iK
253Please respect copyright.PENANAFL2Pfmgcc3
「第一名同學霸,就好似離唔開我一樣,但你知唔知有幾重⋯?唔係淨係一個名銜,係一個好重好重嘅期望⋯」殷書賢每一下呼吸,都覺得胸口比重物壓住,要呼吸一口新鮮嘅空氣都覺得好困難,「我冇完成爸媽嘅期望嘅話,代表我唔夠出色⋯我唔係淨係要對得住第一名嘅名,係要對得住所有人嘅期望⋯考唔考到醫學院都唔係最令人窒息嘅事⋯」253Please respect copyright.PENANADri8B7o9mH
253Please respect copyright.PENANAe8kr0XB65M
「唔係咁樣⋯咁,你對得住自己先係最重要嘛⋯」邱茗然嘗試安慰殷書賢,佢冇感同身受,但佢睇到佢嘅窒息,「唔係你唔夠出色,係大家對你期望太高,你對自己要求太高⋯!」253Please respect copyright.PENANAq9axy5K9Sz
253Please respect copyright.PENANALOaDIfioab
邱茗然望住殷書賢嘅手,不禁沉思起嚟:「到底窒息到咩地步,先會以傷害自己嘅方法令自己有喘息嘅機會?將佢逼到牆角嘅,又係邊個?」253Please respect copyright.PENANA1sjoqAGW74
253Please respect copyright.PENANAtEZRzDAJmM
係聽起嚟好似好光榮嘅三個字,作為第一名要對得住嘅事:期望、其他人嘅期望、自己嘅期望,因為人地嘅期望而成為自己嘅期望嘅一部分嘅期望⋯253Please respect copyright.PENANAlEphEUiOBN
253Please respect copyright.PENANAYo2I7MQeSg
「我唔想我爸媽失望,佢地亦唔會再比我考一次第二名,我嘅路,佢地安排好,要我去行⋯」殷書賢講咗一啲之後,感覺輕鬆咗少少,但都係好痛,好難受,「佢地嘅期望,好重,好高要求,壓到我好痛⋯我反駁佢只係想佢明白我⋯」253Please respect copyright.PENANAN2JzqYBNhM
253Please respect copyright.PENANA9Vpf21shXB
比起要成為醫生,一份自己冇興趣嘅職業,要入醫學院對殷書賢嚟講,唔係最痛苦:最痛苦嘅係,其他人嘅「一定要做到」嘅要求、目光,將佢狠狠咁壓住,壓到佢根本冇起身嘅能力253Please respect copyright.PENANAlVlEQoUbe3
253Please respect copyright.PENANAxpgDkrIao2
喺所有人都追求成為最好最優秀嘅時候,有冇人諗過代價?讀書或者從來都唔辛苦,又或者其實讀書都有讀書嘅苦,只係冇人會去理解253Please respect copyright.PENANAxNyebCWvSK
253Please respect copyright.PENANAGySnIxtJBC
成年人嘅世界中,早就冇咗讀書一回事,佢地唔會理解喺不斷改革嘅教育制度下,學生所承受嘅只係比以前嘅更多253Please respect copyright.PENANACCXlJhnGkm
253Please respect copyright.PENANAvwQoyPVMXP
要求你要做到我心中想要嘅模樣,但會唔會忽略咗孩子真正想要嘅嘢?佢做到之後,開心嘅係你定係佢?253Please respect copyright.PENANAoTUMAwfENs
253Please respect copyright.PENANAt7blTwbRFm
「你唔需要去強逼自己去完成人地嘅期望⋯你完成到自己嘅期望就可以啦⋯」邱茗然將鎅刀收起,從裙袋拎出紙巾,捉起殷書賢嘅手,溫柔地將佢手上滲出嚟嘅血都抹走,「一直保持住喺第一名嘅位置,係你憑實力拎番嚟嘅本事,唔係必然⋯你將來要讀醫,但讀醫係唔係你想行嘅路?如果唔係,唔緊要,你可以揀,呢個係好成績可以得到嘅權利。」253Please respect copyright.PENANAr3z2OnyGf3
253Please respect copyright.PENANAGs1gfnigHu
殷書賢沉默不語,佢嘅目光定喺佢嘅左手上,其實佢冇思考過自己想要點樣253Please respect copyright.PENANADbudsIxdRR
253Please respect copyright.PENANAuefUi4OBHI
喺佢嘅成長當中,父母嘅期望對佢嚟講先係最重要,就算唔想都要完成,咁樣先對得住父母對佢嘅要求,佢地先會開心253Please respect copyright.PENANAWPUS5186Tw
253Please respect copyright.PENANAU2IIV4aZYX
「我呀~好欣賞你可以一直靠自己保持喺第一位,但係第一名唔代表一切,唔代表開心、唔代表快樂。」邱茗然微笑道,「我爸媽雖然都會一直講考試考試,要考得好要努力,會攞我同哥哥比較,但佢地唔會要求我按住佢地嘅要求行,因為將來嘅路係我地自己行,當然要揀自己想要嘅路。」253Please respect copyright.PENANAE9KGvlPzrN
253Please respect copyright.PENANAjSLpmx8HNV
殷書賢沉默不語,要放低自己一直遵從嘅「規則」好困難,早就成為潛意識中嘅習慣,道理佢都明白,但要做到好難253Please respect copyright.PENANAoTVln1Xmno
253Please respect copyright.PENANAKVgMis9LDz
「殷書賢,你唔係讀書嘅機器,亦唔好當自己係讀書機器。」邱茗然輕皺着眉頭,卻以柔和嘅聲線開口講,殷書賢不禁一愣,「就算我地點樣解釋都好,佢地都會唔會明,所以你唔好當自己係機器一樣,遵從自己嘅心就夠。」253Please respect copyright.PENANAXRc9IYAuVm
253Please respect copyright.PENANA1j8kXyhPYW
253Please respect copyright.PENANAHL74lZxdw1
253Please respect copyright.PENANAJd4xgHuc6B
253Please respect copyright.PENANAQCsyZHbusj
IG Link: https://www.instagram.com/nd_cotttoncandy/?hl=zh-tw253Please respect copyright.PENANAhAJ7kJzTOR