“Tonight, Hillview is getting lucky with a meteor shower. Couples of Hillview, be sure to take advantage of this to-”320Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDj4hjFpM7Y
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I change the channel. Why does everything remind me of him? Now I know what Nao felt like back he was rejected for the first time. I shouldn’t have made fun of him, this feels terrible. 320Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcGJPg8G7RR
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I look at my phone and the desire to call him consumes me again. No, I’ve called enough. At this point, I’m probably coming off as a stalker. I lost my chance at a love life.
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Look at me, I can’t even gather the strength to go to school early anymore. But I still have to go. I leave my room and go to the bathroom. At least, I try to but Nao is still inside taking a bath.
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*Knock*320Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0maeiJes7E
*Knock*320Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKxVqgbK7sS
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Alyson: “I still have to go to school Nao, get out already.”
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*Bathroom door opens*
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!!320Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdooJmbSAQM
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Nao: “H-Hey Alyson.”
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Holy….he…actually looks…hot? How did he get so tall and…well built? I actually have to look up a bit.
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Nao: “Are you…blushing?”
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Alyson: “N-No! Your growth spurt just caught me off guard. Out of the way.”
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He gets out of the way and I ran past him into the bathroom.
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*Sigh*320Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6yrwAhUxYQ
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Alyson: “I must still be emotionally compromised. There’s no way I would find him attractive. Yeah, I just need time.”
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I say that but a familiar smell fills my lungs. All around I can smell him and I start to think back to that night. What we almost did…
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Alyson: “Haah…”
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I stop myself from reaching down with a hard slap to the face.
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Alyson: “Calm down, I’m not some lovesick puppy.”
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*Sigh*320Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡONXMSwUC8V
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Alyson: “Why is the bathroom smell like Alphon anyway? Damn, I must be losing my mind. All from my first and only crush, god I’m pathetic.”
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I recompose myself and get ready for school. After washing up and getting dressed I go downstairs to see Nell watching TV.
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Alyson: “Hey Nell, I’m going to school.”
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Nell: “Yes, I’ll see you later.”
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Alyson: “You usually cook around this time. What’s wrong?”
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Nell: “N-Nothing, I just have a lot on my mind. Have fun at school.”
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Alyson: “…Sure, later.”
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First Nao, and now Nell is acting different. What’s happening to my family? It’s…starting not to feel like home anymore.
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I walk out the door to school and wonder who’s fault this all is. These and more thoughts cloud my mind yesterday and today. I just can’t put them completely down and my grades suffer for it.
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I pull myself through the school work the best I can until lunch comes. At least I can relax here.
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“Hello Alyson.”
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My mistake, I forgot about the vultures.
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Alyson: “What?”
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“What’s wrong? Your grades have been slipping, does this mean we have a chance to become queen now?”
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Alyson: “Pft, you? I might be falling down a bit but you 40 places too low to threaten me.”
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“What the hell you say bitch!?”
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I raise my hand and prepare a snap.
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“!!”320Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqeDgLppItg
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Alyson: “I’m still queen and you will show me respect. Go back to your sits before I add you to the black list with the rest of the trash.”
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“…I-I’m calling your bluff. You never put anyone on the black list and the one you did managed to get off of it. Favoritism much? Deanna would never do that.”
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Alyson: “So what?”
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“What?”
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Alyson: “If it was mercy for my brother that means I would have no trouble sending a bunch of nobodies into the black list. And unlike Nao, there are no second chances.”
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“…Tch, Deanna might have been a bitch but at least she was fun. Let’s go.”
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The 3 harpies leave me to my food and I sigh in relief. This will only get worse if I don’t pull myself together.
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???: “Don’t let them you down.”
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Alyson: “Huh?”
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I turn around to see a surprising face.
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Alyson: “Deanna?”
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Deanna: “Huh, you actually responded to me?”
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Damn…
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Alyson: “Think of it as a small mercy.”
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Deanna: “Heh, you must really be out of it.”
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She sits next to me with her own small plate of food. I wonder if this will harm my image but…I don’t care right now.
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Now that I look closer, she’s changed a lot. The vain bitch I shoved into the dirt looks like a typical nerd with glasses.
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Alyson: “You’re bold sitting here while being a Black Lister.”
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Deanna: “You looked like you might need some help. One queen to another.”
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Alyson: “Why would you help me? This is not some scheme to escape the black list right?”
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Deanna: “No, I’m actually happy with the position.”
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Alyson: “You’re kidding?”
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Deanna: “Less pressure and I can focus on studying.”
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Alyson: “…S-Studyng? You?”
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Deanna: “I know you had a lot on your plate so you didn’t notice but I’m done faking my grades. Besides, no boy wants to do my work for the nonchance of fucking me.”
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Alyson: “Damn, I didn’t see that coming.”
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Deanna: “You let a lot fly past you. Even I didn’t do that, I always had ears everywhere. You’re too busy studying and being an unobtainable flower.”
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Alyson: “That’s all that matters to me. Becoming queen is only a stepping stone to greater things.”
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Deanna: “If that’s all that matters what’s stopping our queen’s march to victory?”
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Alyson: “…I don’t know if I should tell you. The last time I saw you, it was when you were on the ground crying from losing your empire. Why approach me now?”
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Deanna: “Because you replied back and you’re going to lose the queen position like this.”
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Alyson: “No I’m not, I’ll bounce back when I sort through some issues.”
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Deanna: “I hope so because no one else here deserves that title.”
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Alyson: “…Thanks.”
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Maybe…she can understand what I’m going through. Just a little bit of the pressure. But before we can talk more I start to notice some mumbling and glares.
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Deanna: “Seems like my time is up. See you later Alyson, I hope you can find a break from that pressure you put yourself under. And if you made a mistake, you should admit it and apologize. It was too late for me but not for you.”
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She leaves my table and slowly disappears back into the background. I’m left with a slightly clear head. What’s important isn’t my feelings for Alphon but my family’s feelings.
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I need to know what’s going on with Nell and…Nao. Maybe I should apologiz-
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NO! HE IS A THREAT TO YOUR FAMILY. REMOVE HIM LIKE YOU DID TO-
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No…I don’t want to do that again. He’s…my family too. Family, I fought so hard to earn. Someone else can motivate me to improve.
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YOU’LL FACE DISAPPOINTMENT! IN THE SAME WAY HE WILL DISAPPOINT EVERYONE WITH HIS INEVITABLE FAILURE.
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You’re right mam….you always are. But…I shouldn’t be the reason for his failure right? I shouldn’t have Black Listed him and sicced Anton on him.
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It all hits me at once. I’m…the reason why my family crumbling like this.
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That one mistake…
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All because of my desire to keep appearances. It caused Nao to explode and strive beyond what’s possible. Even before that, if I encouraged or helped him maybe he could have been better.
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…But doesn’t that Lilly-
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Trevor: “Alyson, babe, I need a favor.”
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*Sigh* I’ll put it out of my mind. It’s all in the past anyway.
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Alyson: “Stop calling babe, we’re not dating.”
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Trevor: “But you are a babe so I don’t see why I can’t call you that.”
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Alyson: “…What do you want?”
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Trevor: “Two things. First, I don’t want anyone else as queen so I hope you get better. Deanna was annoying and a bit clingy. You’re much more interesting.”
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Do you not resemblance, you’re perfect for you each other. Well, used to be.
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Trevor: “Second, I’m dying to know what Nao is up to.”
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Alyson: “…I don’t follow his every movement.”
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Trevor: “You live together and your siblings. You really don’t know what he’s doing? Man, you two have problems.”
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Alyson: “…Can’t you just leave him alone?”
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The air starts to freeze as Trevor’s eyes narrow and burn with searing intensity. I-I never saw him look at me like that before. I can feel my legs begin to liquefy and shake. Is this what Nao has to deal with it…what everyone else sees?
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Trevor: “That’s one thing I won’t do, even for you. I don’t have a lot of time as it is. You have no idea how hard it is to not siege your house for Nao.”
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Alyson: “W-What do you-”
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Trevor: “It’s fine, I’ll ask his friends instead.”
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Alyson: “Wai-”
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And he’s gone….he’s way faster than usual. The rumors of his training weren’t lying. Nao…
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I ignore any prying eyes and scarf down my remaining food. I run after Trevor and after some minutes I find him intimidating Anthony’s group.
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I stop him from hurting Nao’s friends and make sure everyone leaves. After one last look, I return to my day.
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With a more clear view of what to do, I blasted through my school work like usual.
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I return home and for the first time, Nell isn’t there to greet me. I go to my home and wait until Nao comes home. By then I’ll have everything ready.
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Tonight, I’m going to start fixing the damage I’ve done.
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